Some people can be so RUDE!!

Posted on: Fri, 05/05/2000 - 11:49am
momma2rac's picture
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Joined: 03/03/2000 - 09:00

My son's daycare went peanut free a few months ago ( I think the video "it only takes one bite" scared them)
A couple pulled their boys out of the school yesterday. One of the reasons she gave was having to go peanut free. She said "Well I shouldnt have to change my lifestyle for anyone else" , "Why dont they just leave and go somewhere else?" I wonder where else she expects us to go when I suspect everywhere we may run into people who think like that. I really almost felt like writing her a letter and say something like it in case you want to be better educated on this subject.
I know it can be a pain for other parents.. but I would like to believe that I would gladly pack something else in my childs lunch if it could potentially kill someone else child..
It makes me sad sometimes knowing that we will have to deal with these types of people.

Posted on: Sat, 05/06/2000 - 12:02am
Kris's picture
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Joined: 07/29/1999 - 09:00

pThe more we educate other people the better off we'll all be. My cousin had a child with a pa in his class last year. The child's mom came in for parents' night to talk to the parents about pa. My aunt had a little of that "Why should I change my lifestyle for your child?" at first. She mentioned it to my mom and my mom told her all about my son and how it really is a threat to that child's life. Her attitude changed and knowing that someone in her family had the same allergy helped her see the light.br /
I don't have the solution for rudeness, but we need to keep on teaching people. You are doing the right thing./p

Posted on: Sat, 05/06/2000 - 12:19am
rilira's picture
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Joined: 11/11/1999 - 09:00

pUnfortunately, there will always be people who do not "get it". I have had a lot of luck with telling people that " I am not asking you to completely cut these foods out of your life. I just ask that you wait until you leave school to consume these products so my daughter has a chance at a normal life.I understand your child has a right to eat what they want. But is the right to eat the food in the middle of the day as opposed to at home more important than another childs life?" I remind people that what they are actually saying to me is their child's snack is more important than my daughters life.It is amazing the difference when you word it that way./p

Posted on: Sat, 05/06/2000 - 1:50am
mkruby's picture
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Joined: 05/01/2000 - 09:00

pWow...I can not believe the ignorance of some people. I understand that we don't have a right to tell people what they can or cannot do..but this is ridiculous. I think that a child going for 2 1/2 hours in pre-school can go without peanut butter. What, they eat for like 10/15 minutes? I hate to say it, but it won't be the last time you run into this...parents of my childrens' friends do not invite my sons over to play because of their fear...we just have the friends come here. Ignorance and prejudice is going to be there and as I see it, your child is better off not having a child that is being taught such ignorance in your child's classroom and the less rejection he will feel because of it. So basically this lady did you a favor and she didn't accomplish anything for herself or her son, ripping him/her away from his classroom. Heck with her. I am curious as to the preschool's reaction though. Are they going to reinstall peanut products because they are afraid of losing a few bucks?/p

Posted on: Sat, 05/06/2000 - 5:17am
momma2rac's picture
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Joined: 03/03/2000 - 09:00

pNo the school isnt going to change the policy. We were just at a school picnic and I was talking to this new mom. Her daughters legs were red. I asked if she wanted sunscreen and she said no its exema. I said food allergies? She said yes to milk and other stuff, then she mentioned that she tested her with peanuts by putting it on her face and giving her some and she broke out in hives. I said oh, have you got an epi pen? she said no. it was almost like she didnt want to deal with it. The interesting thing is that she is a NURSE!!br /
The majority of the parents are fine with it. The school is a non profit and we do a ton of stuff there so I would be really surprised if they changed the policy/p

Posted on: Sun, 05/07/2000 - 12:48am
Lisa M's picture
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Joined: 03/07/1999 - 09:00

pThis brings up a point that I agree with. The more you are involved in the pre-school or school on a volunteer basis, I think the more open the administrators are to helping you withproblems. Our sons' preschool and grade school are at the church we belong to. I make myself very visible there and am also the pta president for both schools. I just try to be a positive, helpful mom and I think that helps when I go in to talk about my youngest child's allergies. They've been very good about it. I also have gotten to know the elementary administrator well this year because of working with her on projects and I mention every now and then that we still have another school year to discuss what we will have to do for Brett when he starts Kindergarten. This way it won't come totally out of the blue. I know this is a lot more difficult for working moms because of the lack of time./p

Posted on: Sun, 05/07/2000 - 1:01am
rilira's picture
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Joined: 11/11/1999 - 09:00

pI agree 100% Lisa M. I know things have gone so well for us this year because i am very involved. I think it also helps with getting the parents to cooperate when they personally know you. I am fortunate that i don't work. (Actually I was just hired to be an aide in my daughters class). I know many working parents in my daughters class do help in ways that they can. They have projects sent home for them to work on. Things like stuffing envelopes, cutting out paper, stapling. These things take up a lot of the teachers time and they are very appreciative of the help.Some parents help 1 hr. every other week. Just any time or effort you could squeeze in would be well worth it!!/p

Posted on: Sun, 05/07/2000 - 3:00am
mkruby's picture
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Joined: 05/01/2000 - 09:00

pMe too...I am the VP of our PTA and have had no choice but to be a stay at home mom. I have noticed that being involved definately helps with communciation with not only the school, but allowing other parents to ask questions and learn about allergies./p

Posted on: Fri, 07/28/2000 - 11:04am
stine's picture
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Joined: 07/28/2000 - 09:00

pWhen my sons school went peanut butter free there were alot of complainers. During the parents orientation one mom even stood up to complain. I really had to hold back the tears. One mom even said that her childs doctor said he HAD to be eat peanutbutter and asked if my son could just eat his lunch in the office. The school director told her if that was the case then she needed to bring in a note from her doctor and HER son could eat in the office. She never heard another word about it.I am always amazed with the number of moms that say their child won't eat anything except peanutbutter. If they never made their child another sandwich would they starve themselves to death? On another note... I agree with the moms who said volunteering in your childs school helps. I have always been my childs room mom and volunteered eleswhere in the school which I am sure makes them more willing to help me./p

Posted on: Fri, 08/04/2000 - 5:27am
Mommy's picture
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Joined: 06/20/2000 - 09:00

pBefore I found out my daughter was allergic, I read an article in Todays Parent about PA and felt like crying so much because of the hell some parents went trough. And then I found out I'm in for the same ride, imagine that! But do you really want to know why people are so rude: It's because this world contains too many self centered people, if it's not happening to them then they don't want to hear or see it. It's so easy to be rude./p

Posted on: Fri, 08/04/2000 - 5:52am
Heather's picture
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Joined: 10/08/2006 - 09:00

pWow, there are some really great ideas in this thread. Rilira, great suggestions about how working parents can help around the school!/p

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