Does your child ever freak out because ....

Posted on: Sun, 04/25/2004 - 2:25pm
Renee111064's picture
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Joined: 07/05/2001 - 09:00

Does your child ever freak out because someone is eating something potentially dangerous to them?

Recently my ds has been freaking out because of the potential danger he feels that he is in because the food product "may contain" peanuts?

I've explained to him that he doesn't need to freak out that he just needs to remove himself from the situation as quickly as possible if he feels threatened.

He freaked out recently at my mother's house where there was candy (not sure what brand of may contain may have been m&m's).

How would you handle this situation?

Thanks for the help.

Renee

Peanut Free Store

Posted on: Sun, 04/25/2004 - 10:05pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Renee11064, quickly wanted to say yes (children need up for school) this has happened with Jesse and I'll post examples and how we've dealt with it later. But no, it has definitely happened.
Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
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Posted on: Sun, 04/25/2004 - 11:51pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Renee11064, Jesse is not comfortable being around "may contains" because of the 1 in 5 chance. When he came home from school at Easter, he had been given some candy that was "may contain" in a plastic egg. What he did was give the candy to his sister and I (the rare occasion that we even eat "may contains") and ask that we wash our hands and brush our teeth afterward. I believe he's simply cautious.
When we were at his Grandmother's during March break, she ate a "may contain" croissant. He asked Grandma if she could please wash her hands and brush her teeth after she ate it. I thought this was pretty cool of him actually because he's used to being in a peanut/tree nut free home and not used to visiting other people overnight in their homes.
He did "freak out" later though with her when he thought she was giving him the bag from the croissants to put some toys in. He got almost hysterical and just kept saying that he didn't want a baggie for whatever toys she wanted bagged up at that moment. Both Grandma and I realized where he was coming from and he was shown very clearly that it was not the croissant bag (she recycles bags from fruits/veggies etc.) but a new Glad bag. Then, he was okay.
How old is your son?
I've seen Jesse be really freaked out about "may contains" and then it seems this year, a bit less so (the giving of the Easter candy to his sister and I), but I've also really found that it depends on how he's feeling (as if that really explains anything [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/rolleyes.gif[/img] ) I guess sometimes if he's feeling overwhelmed re his allergy (and he will NEVER talk to me about it), "may contains" bother him more than at other times.
I'll place the links for our trip to Toronto and also the Santa Claus parade in this thread for you to have a look at (still continuing to thank Nutternomore [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] ). With the March break trip to Toronto, I think it was just heightened anxiety re everything, so yes, PA was included. Extensive label reading and questioning. With the Santa Claus parade, it was actual peanut products being eaten beside him that has us moving.
Then, there was the summer a couple of years ago, where he just seemed to be in "freak out" mode for no apparent reason. Honestly.
What I do is first get him settled down as best I can and then I really just talk to him about what's going on - why is he freaked out, what is he uncomfortable with, and how we have different things in place to keep him relatively safe.
Hope this kinda helped. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
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Posted on: Sun, 04/25/2004 - 11:57pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

The March break one:-
[url="http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/Forum3/HTML/001281.html"]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/Forum3/HTML/001281.html[/url]
Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
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Posted on: Mon, 04/26/2004 - 12:00am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

And the Santa Claus Parade one:-
[url="http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/Forum3/HTML/001203.html"]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/Forum3/HTML/001203.html[/url]
You poor woman. You get e-mail notification thinking that your thread is booming and all it is is idiot woman who can't get all of her information in one post! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/rolleyes.gif[/img]
My apologies. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
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Posted on: Mon, 04/26/2004 - 1:23am
robinlp's picture
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Joined: 05/14/2002 - 09:00

My son has started doing this especially at the Park. He is only 3 so I'm not really sure how to handle this. He is just started to learn about his allergies so I don't want to tell him not to be cautious but it is hard to find that balance w/ children.

Posted on: Mon, 04/26/2004 - 2:37am
CVRTBB's picture
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Joined: 11/23/2001 - 09:00

My son does freak out if someone comes near him with a pn product but only occasionally with a may contain, usually when he thinks it has actual peanuts in it. I can't really blame him though as he has had some severe reactions to trace residue (on basketballs, computer keyboards etc...). He probably gets it from me though because I try to remove him from any situation where there is pn products around.
Valerie

Posted on: Mon, 04/26/2004 - 4:50am
Kim M's picture
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Joined: 06/09/2001 - 09:00

Renee, how old is your son? I have not run into this yet; maybe DD is still too young (5 1/2)?
Although, as I am typing this, recently my daughter has been saying that people aren't even allowed to [i]say[/i] the word "peanut" because peanuts can hurt her. So, maybe that does qualify as freaking out. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
My take is it's better to be safe than sorry, so I would rather have her be more on the freak out side than the complacent side. I don't particularly worry about her being around may contains, but if at some point she decides that it makes her nervous, I can't really see arguing with her. Her life, after all. I think the best thing you can do is just talk it out with your son, and try to get him to articulate his fears. Maybe by getting him to think things through you can get him to be a little less fearful. But if you can't get him to calm down about it, I would let him make the decision. Perhaps if he sees that he has to power to remove himself from any situation he finds fearful, he'll start to feel more comfortable.
ETA: Sorry, I just went back and re-read your post and realized that you are already telling him that it's OK to remove himself from those situations. Just what is he doing by freaking out? This may just be a phase he's going through as he matures and starts to internalize just how dangerous peanuts are to him. Hopefully as you help him learn how to handle the situations he will learn to deal with them more calmly.
[This message has been edited by Kim M (edited April 26, 2004).]

Posted on: Mon, 04/26/2004 - 6:05am
teacher's picture
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Joined: 11/02/2000 - 09:00

Yes, my PA son just started doing this recently ... he is 6. I took it as a good sign that he is beginning to take SOME responsibility for his own health. But that being said, I don't want him to live a life of anxiety over this.
What we usually tell him when he's getting upset is that he is fine and healthy NOW and he has been living with this for over 5 years. That usually helps him out a lot. Plus, there are a couple of other PA kids in his school, and I will point them out and say, "See? PA kids can do JUST fine ..."
That being said, there are OTHER times when I find it's important to emphasize (and even OVER-emphasize) the dangers around him. I learned from this board to teach him to trust NO ONE implicitely, except his parents. It's ALWAYS okay to second-guess even the most well-meaning adult. That's a tough one for kids!
But yes, it's definitely tough to find a fine line between anxiety and being careless. Especially if your kid is emotionally oversensitive to begin with (and mine is).

Posted on: Mon, 04/26/2004 - 9:48am
Sandra Y's picture
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Joined: 08/22/2000 - 09:00

We eat may contains at home around my PA son, so he is not at all nervous or uncomfortable when other people are eating them. He knows as long as he doesn't eat them himself he'll be fine.
Your son freaking out might have more to do with his personality. Some people are just more high strung and fearful. I am that way myself, but my son is the relaxed type.

Posted on: Mon, 04/26/2004 - 10:18am
erik's picture
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Joined: 05/15/2001 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by Sandra Y:
[b]We eat may contains at home around my PA son, so he is not at all nervous or uncomfortable when other people are eating them. He knows as long as he doesn't eat them himself he'll be fine.
Your son freaking out might have more to do with his personality. Some people are just more high strung and fearful. I am that way myself, but my son is the relaxed type.[/b]
Hi Sandra,
I must be the relaxed type too. Peanuts never freaked me out - if someone near me ate an Oh Henry or Snickers, etc it wouldn't bother me, as I knew I'd only have a reaction if I ate the product. Kids even ate peanut butter sandwiches in the same room, as we did not have peanut-free classrooms when I was a kid. If I was in the park and kids were feeding peanuts to the squirrels, I wouldn't run away.. I'd rush over to watch.
I am surprised at how much fear that so many PA kids have of peanuts. So many kids seem so scared [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/frown.gif[/img] When I was a child, I knew that as long as I didn't eat the peanut product, I would be fine, so I never freaked out. Maybe my personality is more relaxed?

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