\"You\'re the First Parents That Have Ever Wanted to Do This\" - A Small Vent (Promise)

Posted on: Tue, 06/08/2004 - 6:11am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

So, helps to know that I've had a horrid year with my children's school with regard to PA. Written school plan thrown out the window. Constant things throughout the year that just made me want to bang my head against a brick wall until it split open.

I have the BE A PAL certificate that I usually hand out to Jesse's classmates at the end of the school year. My husband and I also write a letter thanking everyone for their efforts for the "peanut free" classroom. Depending on my financial situation at the time, I buy Smarties for each child.

So, speaking with the principal this afternoon. I have the certificate here for him to sign. Then, I simply photocopy it off and if I'm allowed to have the first names only of the children in Jesse's class, I sit down and write them on each individual certificate.

I ask the principal if it would be okay if I did this. I explained to him where the certificate came from (FAAN), what it looks like, etc., that it requires his signature. I go on to tell him that I have seen really young children thankful and empowered by this simple piece of paper.

I told him that I really wanted to give them out in Jesse's class this year because I really had a lot of questions from the children this year re Jesse's allergy (don't know if they've ever had a peanut free classroom before). And 8 year olds, I guess, feel pretty comfie asking questions (or some do). I had a lot of questions and comments throughout the school year and I actually thought it was super (some of the comments were sad, but whatever).

So, to me, this class really deserves being thanked. I don't know if 8 and 9 year olds will appreciate it the same as I saw 4, 5 and 6 year olds. Have no idea.

(We didn't do it last year because I was so ticked off with Jesse's teacher - not a very *good* thing).

Anyway, I do need the principal's permission (and signature) to send out the certificate and also the letter from DH and I.

He says, okay. No other PA parent (he didn't say PA parent, probably just parent in your situation) has ever done this before. I have never been presented with this before, but it sounds okay. I'll take a look at it (the certificate).

Of course, this does come from the man who insisted that no coconut be written into the "peanut free" classroom letter and it also comes from the man who told me that my son would outgrow his allergy (although to-date I have not seen a medical degree on his office wall).

So, just because he's never heard of it before, he makes me feel like I'm doing something weird?

I had actually wanted to see if I could have them presented to Ember's classroom as well because she's in a "peanut free" classroom and you know what? I always love it when she is, even though she is not PA. But with his response to doing Jesse's classroom, odd thing for me to be doing, I thought, no don't even go there.

Waiting for the kids after school tonight the other PA parent (the Mom this time) is standing beside me and she says, "have you seen Chapman's have popsicles out?" She's really pleased and has been going wild buying them because she had never found a "safe" popsicle before. O K A Y..... (although this *could* be relevant to the thread running under Main Discussion re WWYD and the field trip).

I then went on to tell her about all of the NEW products that they have out and that she could get them at our local corner A&P Ultraplus.

Anyway, yup, I'll be the first one to hand out a BE A PAL certificate. Big whoop. I could swat that man upside the head. I honestly could.

At least he didn't nix that and the thank-you letter as well. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/mad.gif[/img]

Thanks for listening. Really a small vent, as promised.

Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]


Posted on: Tue, 06/08/2004 - 10:48am
momma2boys's picture
Joined: 03/14/2003 - 09:00

What an idiot! This should inspire you to pack boxes and get the heck out of there!!
Do you have a copy of your thank you letter posted anywhere on the board? I'd like to send one out this year.

Posted on: Tue, 06/08/2004 - 11:46am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

momma2boys, I don't think I have the thank-you letter posted here, although I might have a long time ago. I'm not even sure because we were so angry last year and didn't do the letter if I kept it in My Documents. I will check though.
Basically all we do is say that we're so and so and that our son was the PA child in your child's classroom this year and that we appreciate all of the efforts that you went to, yadda yadda.
I'll see if I can find it somewhere and let you know.
I realized when I posted what the principal had said to me that some people might read it and think, okay, what did the guy say wrong? It was just his tone and because of the really horrible experience I've had with the school this year period that I was upset.
Okay, so no other PA parent preceding me (or that he has ever known - his children do attend a peanut free school) have thought to send home BE A PAL certificates. So?
I have seen what positive things they can do. I really have. I'm not positive that 8 and 9 year olds are going to care, but it's worth a try. I'm angry with myself for being passive aggressive last year and not thanking the children at least (but I had a helluva time with some parents to as well last year).
The point in telling about the other PA Mom who has just found Chapman's popsicles is that if she's just found Chapman's popsicles here in our town, which has a ton of grocery stores (unlike when I lived in the one horse town) and stores that do have the complete line of "new" Chapman's products, well, I don't know. Great that she found them. But I'm also saying that maybe hey, she doesn't know about FAAN and I'm 99.9% sure she doesn't know about PA.com.
There's nothing wrong with any of that, but again, just because he has never been asked to sign a thank-you certificate before, don't me feel like a gosh darn alien. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/mad.gif[/img]
FAAN has their BE A PAL program for a reason and although I have never used any of the other materials, I always use the certificate (except for last year).
I have seen the positive effects it has on the children that receive it. They feel thanked. They feel empowered.
Now, of course, I'll see how it goes over this year, and maybe Jess is getting to an age where you don't do those kind of things anymore.
Anyway, let me see if I can find our thank-you letter. You would think, knowing me [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/rolleyes.gif[/img] that I have posted it somewhere on this board, but I'm thinking I haven't for some reason. It's a pretty generic letter.
Also, vic had some really great introduction and thank-you letters and I'm not sure if she posted them a ways back. I know I used her introduction letter last year.
And yes, I am packing. Come he** or high water I am leaving this town. It is a beautiful place but it has been so unkind in so many ways and I just want to go home.
Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

Posted on: Wed, 06/09/2004 - 12:08pm
Galette's picture
Joined: 05/26/2004 - 09:00

Dear Alternative,
I'll tell you, when you deal with the pa ignerants it's very hard because we (I, I should say, don't get them, "not getting it" at all).
I would have felt the same way you did. Esspecially because I know what people you have been dealing with, from the sound of it. I met them last year in my dd's first school. Great first time in school let me tell you.
I want to pack my bags too. Doesn't it stink to no end how we have to feel and what we have to do to keep our babies safe in the schools?
I know, believe me, what terrible illnesses
could be and thank God for our health. But I can't get over one thing. That I am not allowed to send dd where they do what they have to do with p/trn a with concern, compassion and most importantly (to me I think) willingness.
I want her to go elsewhere, but I can't have that, it's the only time (in adulthood) I've actually felt like throwing a tantrum about something I can't have, just like a child. Maybe I should get my H to put up the punching bag in garage.
I think you actually have to teach yourself not to get sick over it, because I could see how it can so easily creep in.
Anyway, I hope someday people like you, me and God, who knows how many others don't have to attend the "school from he**" if they know somewhere better they want to go.
Take care,
This started out as a pep talk sorry if it got depressing. I guess you really struck a cord with my last year, and I felt so bad for you and disgusted with these types of people. We shouldn't have to feel like an idiot for a kind and thankful gesture. He as an educator should have saw the opportunity to encourage children in ... I guess it's not that high on the list of importance, COMPASSION!!

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