Why can`t everyone be this nice?

Posted on: Mon, 02/05/2007 - 4:11am
Carefulmom's picture
Joined: 01/03/2002 - 09:00

There really isn`t any answer to this question. It is just a vent. So dd age 11 1/2 had a girl sleep over this past Saturday night. Sunday we went miniature golfing and out to lunch. Dd is allergic to milk and peanuts and avoiding tree nuts. So there is this one restaurant right near the mini golf place that we have eaten at before. Due to the milk allergy, there is almost nothing dd can have in restaurants, but the one thing she can have is shrimp cocktail, which she has eaten at this restaurant before. So we get there and shrimp cocktail is no longer on the menu. I ask the manager and she says they don`t serve it any more. I saw a few shrimp dishes on the menu (Mexican restaurant) and asked if dd could just get some plain boiled shrimp and some ketchup. The manager says the shrimp arrives from outside with a butter sauce---not okay. So we go to this other restaurant that we have been to before where they make dd a special plate of pasta with marinara sauce, making a fresh batch from scratch for dd with no cheese, etc. (It is so hard to eat out with milk allergy!). So out of about 50 items on the menu it is the only thing dd can have. So dd`s friend decides that since dd cannot eat anything else, the friend won`t have anything else either. She will have the special milk free pasta marinara that dd is having.

So here is the point. I just don`t understand all these adults who make such a stink about giving up peanuts for our kids, they can send anything else they want to school with their child for lunch. Yet they get so bent out of shape about not sending peanuts to school. And here is dd`s friend giving up 49 out of 50 items on the menu just to be nice because dd cannot have them. I just wish adults would take a lesson from kids.

Posted on: Mon, 02/05/2007 - 4:17am
bandbmom's picture
Joined: 12/14/2005 - 09:00

Hi Carefulmom!!!
What a nice story! How very considerate and sweet of your DD's friend. Your story made me smile :-)
I truly believe that it's the parents 99% of the time that have the problem with not sending in peanut items, NOT the children themselves. From what I seen with the kids in DS's classes in K, 1st and 2nd grades, the kids care and are very considerate about DS's allergy. They want to make sure he's okay and safe. Some parents/people are just ignorant and don't want to make the effort to find a safe alternative.
Thanks for sharing your positive and happy experience!

Posted on: Mon, 02/05/2007 - 4:29am
chanda4's picture
Joined: 12/14/2006 - 09:00

I agree, a very caring friend, her parents must be doing something *right*!!!
It's nto always the parents(btu I do agree most the time it is) we actually had some 4th graders passing around a petition to get the lunchroom back tot he way it was(our school is the one I've shared the link her ebefore, about having the hot lunch sit together and the cold lunch sit together, and wash hands after...) anyways, they actually are trying to fight the principal to get it switched back(because it interfers with their ability to sit with some of their friends)....what rubs me the wrong way here...THEIR parents are backing them up. SELFISH, pure SELFISH behavior
I think you should thank yoru daughters friend, in front of her parents...at what a sweet and kind, UNselfish jester that was!!!
Chanda(mother of 4)
Sidney-8 (beef and chocolate, grasses, molds, weeds, guinea pig & asthma)
Jake-6 (peanut, all tree nuts, eggs, trees, grasses, weeds, molds, cats, dogs, guinea pig & eczema & asthma)
Carson-3 1/2 (milk, soy, egg, beef and pork, cats, dog, guinea pig)
Savannah-1 (milk and egg)

Posted on: Mon, 02/05/2007 - 4:31am
NicoleinNH's picture
Joined: 06/21/2003 - 09:00

Carefulmom-What a great story! You are so right about the kids getting it way before the parents. The children usually have no problem making accomodations; it is the adults that mess it up [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

Posted on: Mon, 02/05/2007 - 4:34am
gvmom's picture
Joined: 08/24/2005 - 09:00

It sounds like your DD has a great friend!
I, too, think that children are much more considerate than parents are. Kids don't care about the same nonsense as the parents do -- at least from what I've found in my dealings with people at school. They want to have fun, and if there is no food -- or safe food, big whoop! They are cool with it.

Posted on: Mon, 02/05/2007 - 4:36am
krc's picture
Joined: 01/16/2007 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by NicoleinNH:
[b]Carefulmom-What a great story! You are so right about the kids getting it way before the parents. The children usually have no problem making accomodations; it is the adults that mess it up [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
I totally agree. It's so nice to go to the school and see how protective *MOST* of the kids are of dd. (We have had a couple incidents w/ not so nice children but I think its all due to their parents KWIM?)
Your dd is lucky to have such a good friend [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
[This message has been edited by krc (edited February 05, 2007).]

Posted on: Mon, 02/05/2007 - 5:26am
saknjmom's picture
Joined: 04/02/2003 - 09:00

great story....I find the same thing with many children who interact with my son. There are kids who no longer want PB because they don't want to make their friend sick.
Adults are the ones who need to re think their positions on food allergies.

Posted on: Mon, 02/05/2007 - 5:38am
Chicago's picture
Joined: 04/21/2001 - 09:00

I agree it is a great story.
I wonder if since food allergies have recieved more attention in the media, labelling,schools etc... if today's kids will grow up to be more in tune with that being a health issue then the older generations. Just a thought, but hearing about a hidden disablity like food allergies when you are young may make it easier to accept?

Posted on: Mon, 02/05/2007 - 1:31pm
joeybeth's picture
Joined: 09/01/2006 - 09:00

kids ARE the greatest. they are so full of compassion and seem to love helping out. too bad it doesn't rub off on more adults. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

Posted on: Tue, 02/06/2007 - 12:06am
lilpig99's picture
Joined: 12/22/2005 - 09:00

I totally agree on the difficulty level of eating out with a milk allergy...waaaaay hard. And I can only hope my daughter will grow up having friends who care enough about her to behave with such compassion. Kids have that sort of inherent compassion that only seems to get tarnished once adults show them otherwise. Thanks for sharing....

Posted on: Tue, 02/06/2007 - 1:13am
anonymous's picture
Joined: 05/28/2009 - 16:42

Most kids are kind and compassionate. Many adults are as well, but fewer than kids. I think we all start out that way, but life changes us.


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