when the activity is for a non pa sib, but pa son will be there

Posted on: Thu, 12/16/2004 - 7:14am
julieneaman's picture
Joined: 01/11/2004 - 09:00

This has come up several times in recent months and I was wondering how some of you handle it. For example, my non pa dd is having a Christmas party for her Daisy troop. This group meets for an hour twice a month. All the moms and younger sibs generally go and stay since it's so short. Snacks are not usually eaten there. But, this week they're planning a pinata, food, etc. Would you ask for non pa treats bc of pa younger brother, etc or just try to figure a way to keep him out of there? What if I have to bring him? Thanks for any input.


Posted on: Thu, 12/16/2004 - 7:32am
travelplus's picture
Joined: 04/18/2004 - 09:00

Please don't discriminate just because your son has PA and your other son does not, In life we have to accomodate.It would be anti-social to keep his brother at home just because of PA. It's like a consequence for something that he did not cause. I know I would feel resentment and upset that I was left out of something that I would enjoy. Why does it always have to revolve around food? Can't you think of something that all could enjoy? I don't have PA.

Posted on: Thu, 12/16/2004 - 8:54am
2BusyBoys's picture
Joined: 09/03/2004 - 09:00

I kept my DS home from a neighbor's bday party last week and let my older non pa DS attend. The mom told me ahead of time that her daughter really wanted PB cookies instead of a birthday cake. Since the younger son is still too young to really know what he is missing I let him watch a favorite video and have a juice box (what a treat!) while his brother was gone. When big brother came home we washed him up well.
I've decided I can't fight (or win) every battle so I'm choosing them carefully. If your son won't mind staying home or doing something else that might be an option.
Good Luck to you!
Jodi mom to:
Dominic 5/22/01 NKA
Zachary 3/18/03 Peanuts, Dairy, Eggs, Avoiding all TN, Fish, Shellfish...

Posted on: Thu, 12/16/2004 - 9:06am
leers's picture
Joined: 07/09/2001 - 09:00

If my non Pa children have events that may have a peanut issue I let them attend and have what they like. My PA child usually does not attend. He attends enough functions that people accomodate for his allergy that it works out in the end. He never feels left out. If I have to bring my PA child with me I just keep him away from the food and clean my other children up the best I can. I have never had an issue...It is whatever you feel comfortable with.
Hope that helps

Posted on: Thu, 12/16/2004 - 3:11pm
mcmom's picture
Joined: 06/15/2004 - 09:00

I wouldn't ask for non PA treats in this instance, because your PA child isn't the one who is part of the Daisy troop. *But* if you know the other moms fairly well maybe you could let them know you're worried about it, and see if they wouldn't mind not bringing anyhting with nuts. Could you offer to supply the pinata candy yourself? (So far, I've never had a problem with a pinata, everyone has always used the big bag of "Child's Play" candy, which is all safe Tootsie stuff.)
Even if you don't get to talk to the other moms, I wouldn't worry ahead of time about the snacks - there may very well be no peanut products there. You don't say how old your PA son is - if he's young enough, and if there *are* foods you feel nervous about him getting near, maybe you could take him for a walk around the building in a stroller? (I'm assuming the meeting is in a school or church.)
If your daughter is in Daisies, I assume she's around 5 or 6 (I have boys, so I;m not sure [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] ) Would you be able to drop her off and go back and pick her up? I know my friend who has her daughter in Daisies never stays for the meetings. Could another mom keep an eye on your dd during the party while you go run an errand with your son? I'm sure you want to be at the party for your daughter, just throwing out another option. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

Posted on: Thu, 12/16/2004 - 6:04pm
TRexFamily's picture
Joined: 11/30/2004 - 09:00

My toddler (18 months) is PA/TNA. I'm the president of our homeschool group and a Jr Girl Scout co-leader. I have asked that both groups be peanut/tree nut free. However, my DD is integral to both groups. We're a package deal; where I go, my toddler goes. We have a large GS troop (28 girls), and they need me to be a co-leader. So far, both groups have been very accomodating.
However, my DH is a cub scout leader; and we do not request that the pack meetings be PA/TNA free. I bring her and keep her with me at all times. Another cub scout has a younger brother who is PA/EA. His parents do not request that all foods be P free/E free. (The younger sibling is 3.)
This really depends on how accomodating your Daisy leader is, how friendly you are with her and your comfort zone. She may not mind sending home a list of safe candies, but she may balk (for some unexplainable reason). Girl Scouts is about the girl, not the family.
I have a very tight comfort zone and bring DD outside before the pack meeting ends, and snacks are served. Will there be crafts/activities before snacks are served? Can you attend the first part of the party and leave before the food is served?

Posted on: Thu, 12/16/2004 - 11:13pm
julieneaman's picture
Joined: 01/11/2004 - 09:00

Thanks for all your replies. There is another mom who has a toddler going to the meeting. She's taking my Daisy and I'm keepin her toddler at my house w/ pa ds. It should work out fine.
My pa ds is the youngest of 3, so he's frequently along for their activities. I just hesitate to always ask for accomodations when it isn't his activity. If I know the people well or I think it will really be an issue, I will, though.
I often volunteer to bring snacks, goody bags, etc. Geez, this pa stuff is expensive!
Anyway, thanks again.

Posted on: Fri, 12/17/2004 - 12:54am
synthia's picture
Joined: 10/05/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by julieneaman:
[b]This has come up several times in recent months and I was wondering how some of you handle it. For example, my non pa dd is having a Christmas party for her Daisy troop. This group meets for an hour twice a month. All the moms and younger sibs generally go and stay since it's so short. Snacks are not usually eaten there. But, this week they're planning a pinata, food, etc. Would you ask for non pa treats bc of pa younger brother, etc or just try to figure a way to keep him out of there? What if I have to bring him? Thanks for any input.
Would you ask for non pa treats bc of pa younger brother,[b] YES!I have twins one with PA(Little V),and one without PA(little A).In school the teacher knows that Little A is not allowed to eat peanuts or thier products because of Little V,per his allergiest.The reason is because you can not keep them apart and the risk is high![/b]
Serino he eats it wipes hands on clothes and hair touches his back pack and has it on his breath so fourth and so on.
As the allergiest put it "it would be like me having a peanut allergy and dh eats it and then kisses me" A no no![/b]
On another not I have a 8 year old she is allowed to eat pbj at school if she would like to. However,she knows the rules.
1 She is to tell me as soon as she sees me.
2 she is not to kiss or hug or touch Little V until she has taken these steps.
3 She is to wash her hands after lunch.
4 she is to come right in to the house and change her clothes and wash her hands and brush her teeth.I put her clothes in the washer right away(by them selfs).
It's kinda funny because at first my 8 yo said she does not eat pbj because she does not want to brush her teeth!Now she say's she doesnot want to [b]not[/b]be able to hug Little V upon school letting out.What I beleive is that she wants [b] no harm to come to her sister[/b]
What if I have to bring him?
Explain to the child that you need to ck all labels before he can touch or eat anything.I tell Little V it is not safe for her to eat because of Peanuts.Later on when she can read I will then start to explain to her about the different labes in re: to may contains, processed on, made in ect...
If you do bring him,just make sure you take [b]Epi-Pens[/b] and read all labels.
Good luck and let us know how it goes.
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