What was the Most Influencing Factor in deciding to homeschool?

Posted on: Sat, 01/03/2004 - 10:48am
MommaBear's picture
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?

Posted on: Sat, 01/03/2004 - 11:23am
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For us it was spiritual beliefs followed by better educational choices , followed by a better control of the child's social activities.
I've seen pa/ta kids public school successfully without issues, so that didn't even enter into our decision.
Of course reading all ya'lls trouble with pa/ta in the classroom , it makes me even more grateful that we homeschool.

Posted on: Sat, 01/03/2004 - 1:16pm
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[b]flexible curriculum[/b], that could fit a child able to read Harry Potter at age 5 and who hates drawing and crafts.
Can you imagine him spending a whole year in kindergarden?? Not me.
Also found out how inflexible the private schools were in my area.
PA was somewhat of a factor, but not the most important one. Just an added bonus, I guess.

Posted on: Sat, 01/03/2004 - 1:52pm
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We had 'heard' of homeschooling before DS was diagnosed, but I'm not sure we would have done it. The multiple allergies were the number one factor in our decision, followed closely by a desire to have better control over our child's academics. Having spent a year or so looking into it, spiritual aspects have started to become more of an issue.

Posted on: Sat, 01/03/2004 - 4:56pm
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I loved the idea of homeschooling before ds was born. Individualized curriculum at the time the child needs instruction looked really appealing! We live in an urban area, so why not take advantage of the art museums, nature centers, orchestras, libraries and all the marvelous "field trips" whenever we want. I also thought that my DH and I make a good teaching team.
DS's multiple food allergies were what convinced my husband. We'll take it one year at a time. But I've come a long way in convincing him, DH asked to be the one at home during the day when I finish nursing school.
Jacqueline

Posted on: Sat, 01/03/2004 - 5:15pm
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I felt like the school did not have any concern for my daughter. The principal is the type of person that is not going to do anything that she doesnt have to do. The teacher my daughter had that didn't take her PA allergy serious and at 5 she thought my daughter was old enough to take on the responsibility herself. A teachers comment that it was impossible to monitor everything that came into the classrooms, how it was the parents responsiblity, (I took that as the PA child should be the parents responsibility not the schools), and that it was a good thing I took her out of school. The classroom aide that ate the snicker bar at my daughters classroom table, I told the teacher about it and apparently she didn't see it necessary to tell the aide it was a peanut free classroom because the next day I asked the aide if the teacher had explained anything to her and she hadnt. The day of the x-mas party I found the butterfinger in my daughters book bag then told the teacher and she just took the bag of candy said oh with sort of a laugh and tossed the bag on the classroom table. This is just some of the reasons.
Doesn't make me too confident in the school. This is what influenced me to homeschool.
I think she is learning more at home then she would be in school but she is missing out on friends. Thats the only down fall I can see about homeschooling.
Lynn

Posted on: Sun, 01/04/2004 - 2:32am
Jennifer1970's picture
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Lynn , check around , there should be a homeschooling club of sorts where your daughter can meet new friends. We've got two really good homeschool groups in the area and our town only has 4,000 people in it. Certainly in a bigger area they'd have more clubs.

Posted on: Sun, 01/04/2004 - 4:07am
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I live in a town of 3000. There are no homeschooling groups here.
Lynn

Posted on: Sun, 01/04/2004 - 4:30am
StaceyK's picture
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If we decide to homeschool over private Catholic school, the peanut allergy issue will be the #1 reason. This is because we are extremely opposed to public schools, and if we can't safely go to the private school, we would never consider the public one. Every day we hear of another reason for this. The moral climate, the 'socializing' messages in the curriculum that we feel are opposed to not only our personal beliefs, but actual reality, also, the quality of the education in *OUR* local public schools is substandard. Also, we have noticed a disturbing trend of NOT *no* religion in schools, but just no Christianity, while other religions are not only allowed symbolically, but actually TAUGHT or are part of enrichment exercises whereby, for example, the students pretend to be muslim for a week or Hindu, including praying in those particular ways. BUT Christianity, our faith, is simply FORBIDDEN outright. We feel this sends the wrong message to our children.
These are just a few examples.

Posted on: Mon, 01/05/2004 - 8:13am
Kay B's picture
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Oh, definitely the peanut allergy. After our dd was taken out of kindergarten in an ambulance because the school was lackladasical about handwashing rules, they REALLY didn't want her there. It seemed they looked for any excuse to exclude or humiliate her, so that we would take her out. (Such as making her eat alone at a table on a stage in front of the whole first grade, or saying they were taking all the other kids to a class party (serving unsafe food) and leaving her behind. )
One thing about peanut allergy is that often it is easy to make "the problem" go away, in that if they make it unsafe enough, a parent feels compelled to pull their child from school. And even though I have sometimes felt like a complete failure because I didn't fight longer or harder for my daughter to stay in school, at least my heart doesn't pound every time I hear an ambulance pass by -- wondering if it's racing to save my daughter. And on the upside, she's able to work well above grade level in several areas.
Kay

Posted on: Mon, 01/05/2004 - 10:07pm
MommaBear's picture
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Quote:Originally posted by Kay B:
[b]Oh, definitely the peanut allergy. After our dd was taken out of kindergarten in an ambulance because the school was lackladasical about handwashing rules, they REALLY didn't want her there. It seemed they looked for any excuse to exclude or humiliate her, so that we would take her out. (Such as making her eat alone at a table on a stage in front of the whole first grade, or saying they were taking all the other kids to a class party (serving unsafe food) and leaving her behind. )
One thing about peanut allergy is that often it is easy to make "the problem" go away, in that if they make it unsafe enough, a parent feels compelled to pull their child from school. And even though I have sometimes felt like a complete failure because I didn't fight longer or harder for my daughter to stay in school, at least my heart doesn't pound every time I hear an ambulance pass by -- wondering if it's racing to save my daughter. And on the upside, she's able to work well above grade level in several areas.
Kay[/b]
your words gave me chills, they hit so close to home. Little goosebumps, even.

Posted on: Fri, 01/09/2004 - 10:31am
FromTheSouth's picture
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Since my dd is airborne/casual contact p.a., it definitely influenced our decision to h.s. these past "6" years. At first it was an age issue, as well. We didn't feel a kinder. would remember to ask before eating food (this proved to be true several times..fortunately in our nut-free home) and she was potentially going to be exposed to p.b. on a daily basis. Most of the schools hadn't even heard of peanut allergies and certainly not of a dc as allergic as my dc. A lot of media attention has helped in this regard but we haven't been convinced they will take the preventative measures and respond quickly to analp. shock. I now have 3 other dc, two of which I also h.s. and a toddler.
I reevaluate our educational options each year. I feel there are social reasons "not" to send them to school and, based on test scores, have to wonder if they would get a good education at our local schools. I take it one year at a time.

Posted on: Tue, 01/13/2004 - 12:41pm
tcperrine's picture
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I never would have considered homeschooling if not for my daughter's PA (and later developing mild asthma). However, after reading dozens of books and talking to dozens of people, both online and IRL, I am compelled to dedicate our family to homeschooling.
Just today I saw a bus go by as we were laying on a blanket in the backyard basking in the warm sun and cool breeze (we're in FL). I felt bad for those kids coming home so late in the day and having to go inside for homework. We had a picnic lunch outside, read 2 chapters of Little House in the Big Woods (discussed hunting, bullets (eek), and butter churning), played a pollen-gathering/honey-making bee game (she was actually pulling pollen off of hibiscus flowers while pretending she was a bee), later we smelled a far-off fire and saw very small ash particles landing on our book. She did not know what ashes were so I got a piece of paper, a match, and lit up. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img] Later, we made bread together (she measured all the ingredients and formed her own loaf) and I had her pick out 12 pre-frozen homemade meatballs and put them in a pot for dinner. Mind you, my daughter is only 3 1/2 so this was quite an educational day for her.
So, PA may have brought me to homeschooling, but I am convinced it is the best thing for us. For that, I am grateful to her PA.
Carolyn
[This message has been edited by tcperrine (edited January 13, 2004).]

Posted on: Thu, 04/22/2004 - 11:51pm
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OK Mommabear, here is my question. I gather from diff. threads that you are trying to set up a plan so that your cubs can attend public school instead of homeschooling as you are doing now.
I am not questioning your decision, but was just wondering (as I have considered homeschooling myself) what is now influencing your decision to stop homeschooling?
I've really tried to get info about homeschooling as far as social dev., the childs feelings about it, the parents feelings, etc.
Do you now feel that public school (or maybe private, not sure which route you are going) is now the better option?
If it is personal reasons than forget I asked. Just gathering information for future reference.

Posted on: Fri, 04/23/2004 - 12:23am
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Quote:Originally posted by momma2boys:
[b]OK Mommabear, here is my question. I gather from diff. threads that you are trying to set up a plan so that your cubs can attend public school instead of homeschooling as you are doing now.[/b]
Just to clarify, [i]I am still going to homeschool[/i]. If my son can safely attend and access services, even a full program, [b]so be it.[/b] We are still in that process. It's been a long process/journey. Let me get my answer together, just about to sit and watch "Cheaper By the Dozen" with hubby and going to work later. Probably when I come home tomorrow morning. (He also brought home "Kill Bill",.......... I chose Cheaper By the Dozen". [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img])
Quote:Originally posted by momma2boys:
[b]I am not questioning your decision, but was just wondering (as I have considered homeschooling myself) what is now influencing your decision to stop homeschooling?
I've really tried to get info about homeschooling as far as social dev., the childs feelings about it, the parents feelings, etc.
Do you now feel that public school (or maybe private, not sure which route you are going) is now the better option?
If it is personal reasons than forget I asked. Just gathering information for future reference.[/b]

Posted on: Fri, 04/23/2004 - 8:22pm
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MommaBear - I decided to homeschool not because of PA, but because of the utter failure known as middle school.
Ignoring 504 plans, which included accomodations for ADD, and letting her flunk 5 subjects out of 7 with out even giving a crap are the main reasons. And then there was the abusive "friend" my daughter put up with and even left a suicide note for in her locker. The joke of a counselor really enjoyed showing me that. (See, you daughter is a failure, not US). Arrgh. Bad situation, bad people, BAD SCHOOL!!!
-Kay

Posted on: Sat, 04/24/2004 - 1:20am
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Disclaimer: I am not offering advice in any manner or form to anyone. Only answering questions as they pertain to my *own* cubs in their highly individual, unique, and personal circumstances.
Quote:Originally posted by momma2boys:
[b]OK Mommabear, here is my question. I gather from diff. threads that you are trying to set up a plan so that your cubs can attend public school instead of homeschooling as you are doing now.[/b]
My youngest cub (age 4) [i]already[/i] attends an Early Intervention Program. We also homeschool him a PRN. My older cub (age 8) is 100% homeschooled currently. It would not be instead of, but [i]in addition to[/i]. Homeschooling added a whole new dimension to parenting/family life. We don't intend to discard it. It affords us more time to be a family. We love it. Even Grandma loves it...................
She has a boarding school background and was eager to help implement. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] [i]How sad the immeasurable contributions/wisdom/gifts of Grandparents and the elderly in general are sooooooooooo overlooked at times.[/i] My mother is firecracker. You know, the need for her wisdom and assistance came when she [i]needed to be needed[/i] more than ever.[i][b]God surely doesn't give us more than we are able to bear.[/b]
I'll have to say I couldn't have done it on my own. She is a wonderful resource (and waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more decisive than I). I'm still learning from her.
Quote:Originally posted by momma2boys:
[b]I am not questioning your decision, but was just wondering (as I have considered homeschooling myself) what is now influencing your decision to stop homeschooling?[/b]
Trying to put my finger on that same question. We won't cease to homeschool. (At least not entirely, not sure yet where everything will land, or in what proportions, as we are [i]still in process[/i]---- IEP first, 504 next. Since we have more experience with the healthcare aspect than the educational one I feel identifying our child's educational needs will help us in determining the course of the 504. Of course, some items are [i]non-negotiable[/i]. [i]We are[/i] prepared in either event. [b]It's a wonderful condition to have[/b]. Remember that angst, I posted about over a year ago? I don't know where it went. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
[i]If[/i], this fall, my oldest cubs is attending school outside the home, or provided by the school in another setting, I hope my oldest cub doesn't lose that beam when he tells people "I'm homeschooled". [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img]
We would like to maintain what [i]momentum[/i] we have achieved.
Did I mention the public school he previously attended that is allotted to our area has a new principal, new superintendent, new vice superintendent, and a new psychologist? I mean, I might as well mention the private school he attended also has a *new* principal. (But that is a *moot* point.)
Don't see *why* we should [i]stop[/i] homeschooling, even if he attends a public school fulltime. I mean, we have *enjoyed* it. We have viewed it as a very special time. It would be heartwrenching to see it go *entirely*.
I'm also noting that I cannot predict the future. I may important someday that my cubs be "documentable in the system". Don't even know if I will be alive "someday". Does anyone?
Quote:Originally posted by momma2boys:
[b]I've really tried to get info about homeschooling as far as social dev., the childs feelings about it, the parents feelings, etc.[/b]
I never looked it up much myself. [i]I Didn't feel the need.[/i] There might be a few blips I posted that I came across, but given the situation we previously found ourselves in, we just did it. Failure was not an option.
I mean, I don't *think* it is necessarily unusual, odd, or detrimental. Why. Would. It. Be? (Never did feel that way, just didn't feel it was anyone's decision to make or demand for our children and ourselves except [i]for us[/i]. My tax dollars should be proof enough of that. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/tongue.gif[/img] However, I do believe that possibly there exist children who needs cannot be met in a "traditional school setting". Some possibly not in a school building at all. I mean, "homebound" options.
Back to homeschooling. It's in one's approach. I think homeschooling can be a very rewarding part of parenting/family life in general. For everyone, all the way around. [b]Circular. [/b] Children learn from everyone (I remember that---since I may or may not be pleased with [i]what[/i] they learn.) At least from the way we approach it.
I mean, as a child, and a teen, [b] I would have loved to have been 100%, full time homeschooled. [/b]Maybe it's just me. My mother was [i]always[/i] homeschooling me one way or the other. I just also happened to attend school in a *traditional school setting*. Maybe it's just me.
Just off the top of my head......... I [i]disliked[/i] the lunchroom, [i]disliked[/i] the bus (on the limited occassion I rode it), and I [i]disliked[/i] dodgeball. In any form. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/tongue.gif[/img] I loved my family. I still do. They were a [i]priority[/i]. They still are.
Quote:Originally posted by momma2boys:
[b]Do you now feel that public school (or maybe private, not sure which route you are going) is now the better option?[/b]
Honestly? Don't know. I mean, we have a limited sample. The private school I myself went to and trusted as [i]wholly[/i] as I could ever trust a school, wrote my son off [i]literally[/i] and overnight, when certain meager requests were presented hat in hand, and by default, wrote both of them off, and [b]never looked back[/b]. And our family, prior to the decision to send both of our children there, put a great deal of effort, thought, and heart into that choice. It was due some very special persons in our public school system who looked upon our children with compassion and understandng that we even entered into this [i]process[/i] again.
My son has never asked to return to school. He has never complained. I do believe *he is happy*. When I ask him if he would like to attend school (traditional setting ---still, gotta wonder what "traditional is") he almost acts............[i]heartbroke[/i]. I mean, he always hugs me when he tells others.
He does eyeball artwork, "classwork", and other items youngest brings home from "Early Childhood", even if he already has is own "homeschool" items to post on the fridge. Inevitable, huh?
They have invited our whole family on their fieldtrips. [b]They have made him welcome.[/b] They have made both welcome.
I will note that while I have heard [b]passively[/b] "it is important to send children to school so they can socialize and make friends"............. I admit it would pleasant if he met but one child as happy and as welcoming as he is. Individuality aside. There will be time enough for that. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img] Great if it works out that way...........but, I feel there would be equal value for my cubs experiencing the side of socialization (within safe limits of course) that affords them [i]real lessons[/i]. Lessons that will prepare them for what lemo........curves life is known to pitch. KWIM? (Maybe many don't). Painfully we realized this.
Again, at this point we are still in [i]process[/i].
I am told that there is much our school can offer/afford my cubs. Some of it which our insurance coverage has denied/revoked coverage for. Currently, youngest cub has been treated [i]royally[/i] by the particular branch of the public school system that serves our area. The staff we have encountered there have been outstanding, kind, compassionate, understanding, ethical, and informed. There has been an expressed desire to do the same for my oldest cub. The staff we recently met with at the same school building we anguished in over a year ago showed similiar promise. Trying not to stand in the way. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] [b]Either way[/b], we are prepared.
We cherish our children being with us whenever and wherever. It's that we would miss the most.
As always, life is a journey.
[This message has been edited by MommaBear (edited April 24, 2004).]

Posted on: Sat, 05/08/2004 - 1:16pm
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Wow MB, what a great post. I am so happy things are working out for you.
Over this school year there have been many times where home schooling looked like the best way to meet our son's needs. We REALLY had to fight with his school to even acknowledge his needs and not brand him a behavior problem. (which they tend to do).
However, sort of like your situation, suddenly things turned. We don't have anyone new, but they all seem to see him more as a funny and engaging little boy instead of a pain in the butt.(once we forced them to accomodate Ds, and then he was able to cope and much happier) AND, now they are bending over backwards for him/us. DS actually LIKES school now, amazingly enough. And next year, he will get to go to a pull out program for gifted children. (if we're still here and not in the USA)
However, like you said, I home school as a supplemental thing TO school. We DO a lot-not a lot of written/producing things, but we tour facinating places, identify bugs/birds/animals, volunteer at the SPCA...and when you mentioned the elderly I thought that it would be fun to volunteer in an old folk's home. I love it just as much as you do. There's nothing cooler then watching your kids as they are totally wide-eyed and facinated by something.. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
Man, I really gotta visit Chicago......lol

Posted on: Sun, 05/09/2004 - 1:54am
MommaBear's picture
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Quote:Originally posted by KarenH:
[b]Man, I really gotta visit Chicago......lol[/b]
[img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img]
*************************
You know, I believe everything that happens has a purpose. I mean, just look at the past year or so. I think where my family is is a *good* place (not talking about location [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img]. I think where we are was only possible through certain processes. That whole heat/dross/silver concept. Something about all things working together for *good*. We are very pleased at this point, and still in process. Did I think this is where we would be before? Couldn't have said. Just one of those times (of many) where you just have to do what you have to do.
Do I think it will work out a certain way? No. Do I have my suspicions? yes. Am I prepared for any way it works out? [i]you bet.[/i] [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img]
KarenH, I love your posts. You know that, don't you? Here is hoping you pass through Chicago sometime. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

Posted on: Sun, 05/09/2004 - 3:41am
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MB-you made me grin [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] You're so sweet.
Hope you're having a nice Mother's day....

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