What do you do when PA child is asking for peanuts?

Posted on: Fri, 11/21/2003 - 11:47am
brimor's picture
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Joined: 06/09/2000 - 09:00

Our 9-year-old daughter (who has been PA since she was 6) has been saying lately that she really wants to have peanuts/peanut butter again. She remembers eating it and loving the taste of it...she also remembers the anaphylatic reaction that sent her to the hospital which is why I can't understand why she'd be asking for it.

We've told her that she can't have any, but I'm just afraid that she's going to be our Morgan and push the limits and try it and see what happens.

Has anyone dealt with this, and how did you handle it?

Thanks

------------------
Liz, mom to:

B: asthma, bee sting allergy, mild EA's and eczema

M: asthma, peanut & nut, severe EA's and mod eczema

A: asthma, peanut, nut, fish, penicillin, severe EA's and eczema

Posted on: Sat, 11/22/2003 - 12:54am
joeybeth's picture
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Joined: 09/01/2006 - 09:00

my youngest pa child (she just turned 5) sometimes makes comments about her desire to try peanut butter...which she's never had. this usually happens after some commecial on tv talks about how delicious it is, or something like that. so far i just explain to her that she can't have it no matter what and that she has many other alternatives. she can't remember any of her few reactions when she was very little.
my older pa daughter is about to turn 8 and is much more accepting of the allergy. she never makes any positive comments about peanuts or wanting to eat peanut butter like all her friends. she is more concerned about her health and safety and can remember her reactions.
once last year she did ask me.."mom; tell me the truth. IS peanut butter really as good as all my friend's say?" (she has never had it except during her first very serious reaction as a baby). i tried to be honest and yet positive and said, "well...truthfully, yes. it is very good. i used to eat it before i had you and your sister. however, there are lots of other things just as good or better that you CAN have like strawberries, some chocolates, homemade cakes, etc." i tried to be as honest as possible while reminding her that there are lots of other things they can eat.
i also remind my girls that they have outgrown their soy, wheat and egg allergies (which were never life threatening, in our situation) which is something to be thankful for. and that many other people have other food allergies in addition to the peanut allergy. i told them about a child here that has a very serious allergy to all things containing milk. his life is much more limited than ours is. i've told them there are so many other things we could have to deal with that are more complicated than pa.
i never want to downplay the seriousness of their pa or make them feel they don't have the right to be angry about it....just wanted to help the girls see the big picture. it does stink, big time, that they can't have what their friends can have and that they have to be so careful. i want them to realize i agree with that but i also want them to see that it's something we can live with. it's so hard to try to help them focus on the positives without minimizing the seriousness of pa.
just wanted you to know my kids have the same questions and desires as yours, most likely. i guess that part is normal.
joey

Posted on: Sat, 11/22/2003 - 3:59am
skanb's picture
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Joined: 05/24/2001 - 09:00

What about trying the sun butter or safe soy butter? From what I hear, both of these taste very close to pb, but are safe for pa kids. Would this help? Kristi

Posted on: Sat, 11/22/2003 - 5:58am
momjd's picture
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Joined: 02/24/2002 - 09:00

How much of the 'scary' information have you shared with her? Are there any materials, reactions stories, etc. that she's not seen that you would be comfortable showing to her in order to get your point across?

Posted on: Sun, 11/23/2003 - 2:11am
brimor's picture
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Joined: 06/09/2000 - 09:00

Thanks for the replies!
I guess maybe it is a normal part of an allegy kids life - to wonder about and want what you can't have.
We haven't tried the sun butter or soy butter yet, but I'll look around here and see if I can find it. Maybe that will keep her pb 'craving' satisified.
When she her her first reaction, we went over everything that could happen, including that she could die. We were honest about reactions with her as we thought she had to know what we were dealing with. And probably another reason we were so honest with her is that she's a bit of a daredevil and we didn't want her to test this one. I guess it's a fine line how much you tell your kids, and I would guess that some would say we told her too much. But in the real world, you have to know what you're facing so that you can deal with it.
Thanks for everyone's thoughts and ideas...I like to hear them!
------------------
Liz, mom to:
B: asthma, bee sting allergy, mild EA's and eczema
M: asthma, peanut & nut, severe EA's and mod eczema
A: asthma, peanut, nut, fish, penicillin, severe EA's and eczema

Posted on: Sun, 11/23/2003 - 2:17am
darthcleo's picture
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Joined: 11/08/2000 - 09:00

I'm not even sure where I stand myself on this, but have you considered doing a food challenge for her at hospital?
She *would* get to taste peanuts, and she would probably learn her lesson that way.
Don't do it outside of an hospital setting, though, and *ONLY* if your allergist agrees to it. It *is* playing with fire after all. I'm not even sure myself it would be a good idea.
On the other hand, I know my uncle let me take a puff of his cigarette (French ones, unfiltered, very strong) when I was 6 yo. I have never ever touched a cigarette since. I coughed for 48 hours and thought I was going to die. Totally cured me! Maybe a similar approach could work?

Posted on: Sun, 11/23/2003 - 12:30pm
megans mommy's picture
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Joined: 08/26/2003 - 09:00

Megan is almost 2....so not old enough to ask for peanut butter yet. She loves her sunbutter though!! Her sister still has peanut butter (which we are VERY careful with) and she has sunbutter. We are trying to switch over to a totally sunbutter house only--my husband and I don't eat the peanut butter. It actually doesn't even taste good to me anymore!!
Here is a link to sunbutter. [url="http://sunbutter.com/"]http://sunbutter.com/[/url] The shipping is very expensive, but I just ordered a case (12) of the 1 lb jars and shipping was $15.00. It came to about $4.00 a jar, which I didn't think was too bad at all. Before when I ordered 2 jars, the shipping was almost as much!! I would order a sample (it's under $2.00) and if you like it, I would buy a case. This might make your daughter feel better. Maybe she won't feel as 'left out' if she has something similar to peanut butter.
Oh, and if you type in 'allergy' under the coupon code, it will deduct .75 from your order. You can even do this on the samples!

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