New, needing moral support

Posted on: Sun, 03/14/2004 - 1:17pm
jngmom's picture
Joined: 06/16/2003 - 09:00

I have been reading these boards since my ds was diagnosed with PA back in August 2003. He is now 19 months old. I just learned this evening from older daughters (6,5) that their father (who told me 11 days after son's birth that he wanted a divorce)took them to the Crab Shack for dinner... a local restaurant with buckets of peanuts on the tables. THey stated that father kept son safe by keeping the peanuts at the other end of the table.

He does not agree that son has PA because the blood test came back negative, although the skin test and the oral challenge were both "impressive" and positive and I have witnessed 4 reactions in the past 9 months, with the hives getting bigger each time. I guess this was his way of saying - you see, I told you so. I feel certain that the father would not recognize the signs unless my son actually stopped breathing.

I will be calling my attorney in the morning to try and petition the court for supervised visitation until my son is a bit older... I am really just posting for moral support....

I have super wonderful friends and family who have been so supportive, but you just don't understand the fear of PA unless you have a child with it....

Thanks for listening.

Posted on: Mon, 03/15/2004 - 2:12am
Merri-Kim's picture
Joined: 01/30/2004 - 09:00

So sorry to hear that you're having a hard time. I understand how terrifying it is to think that people don't understand and may be putting your child at risk without knowing it. It seems that some people are just not willing to hear. I hope you are feeling better soon and that your children's father will recognize the dangers soon.

Posted on: Mon, 03/15/2004 - 2:57am
AJSMAMA's picture
Joined: 06/12/2002 - 09:00

He is obviously insensitive and ignorant. I am very sorry that you have to deal with this. Good luck with the supervised visitation. I am sure I read another thread similar to this a year or so ago. The woman was in a situation very much like yours. Hopefully whoever that was will see your post and offer some wisdom.

Posted on: Mon, 03/15/2004 - 3:27am
mommyofmatt's picture
Joined: 03/12/2004 - 09:00

That must be really hard for you. We have some family members who don't get it, and it's incredibly frustating and tense when my son is around that food. It is good, however that your other children told you, so you know what's going on. At least they get it, and can help watch out for him.
Good luck!
Meg, mom to:
Matt 2 yrs. PA,MA,EA
Sean 2 yrs. NKA

Posted on: Mon, 03/15/2004 - 3:41am
CorinneM1's picture
Joined: 06/20/2002 - 09:00

You stated that he does not believe that your son is PA due to a negative blood test, but other positive tests. Its fairly simple, has a doctor diagnoised your son with PA and given you a prescription for an epi pen(s)? If so, I would think that you will or should bring this information, documented medical information to your atty when you ready to file a petition.

Posted on: Mon, 03/15/2004 - 7:09am
jngmom's picture
Joined: 06/16/2003 - 09:00

Thank you to everyone for your encouragement.
Yes - my son was diagnosed and given epi pens even before any formal testing was done because his eyes and face swelled up and he broke out in hives from one bite of a pb&J sandwich.
I also read through the thread of a very similar situation from last year - I wonder how things worked out for that mom and her two daughters.

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