Hi. I've been reading this site since October, but have never joined in. You all have been a great help! I've been TNA since I was 18 (I'm now 33). In October I was diagnosed PA. My stress level has escalated. I was used to the TNA, but to me, the PA is worse. Peanuts (as you all know) are everywhere!
My husband travels 2 weeks at a time. I am a stay home mom with a 4 yr old and a 10 yr old, and I'm paranoid all the time. I'm sooo afraid I'm going to have a reaction when I'm alone with them. My husband and my mother just don't "get it". My husband thinks it is no big deal even though he has taken me to the ER twice after eating out. He sat down yesterday w/ my 4 yr old and ate Reese's pb cups (that my mother brought over) in the family chair that I always sit in, and I freaked! He thinks I'm crazy. Does anyone else have a spouse that doesn't get it?
Also, I've read that some people trust Pillsbury slice and bake cookies. Last night I was making some of the chocalate chip for my kids (I don't eat it b/c I don't trust it) and there was a nut in it. It was either a walnut sliver or a pecan. I'm not sure which. Just thought I'd let you all know.
On Dec 27, 2004
Yikes--base support starts with your family. All the time, it's my wife and myself against the world to protect our PA son, although at times our two daughters "suffer" from foods we no longer let them eat at home, that's the way it goes when you think of the consequences. My wife and I will not eat what our son can't eat, unless we escape out to dinner once every 3-4 months!!! I'm not one to dole out advice....but does your husband want to raise your kids alone if something should happen to you? Best of luck.
Chris Danielle 12 NKA Jessica 9 NKA Christopher 3 PA Level VI
On Dec 27, 2004
Welcome to the boards!!! just if your intrested- ive got a nut allergy site too!! (Im 13 and treenut anaphylatic!) [url="http://www.goingnuts.cjb.net"]www.goingnuts.cjb.net[/url]
and also its forum
On Dec 29, 2004
Hi and welcome BelindaA! MY DS is 3 1/2 and PA - avoiding all nuts.
DH was a little bit slower in the starting process, he backed me up but I had to go over some details over and over, til he got the picture of how serious this is. (that is probably because we have never had to face any bad reaction). DH always tought of me as a worrier anyway before the allergy (I can worry too much sometimes about things but now I am glad I am this way).
I showed him some posts on this site, so he could see that everybody worries in a situation like that, asked him to do some searches on the Net, go to the doctor with me, etc.. and now he is doing all that on his own. He is getting more and more aware and careful everyday.
My family was worse to explain to, I had to be firm and make my point across. Now they are very supportive.
My tip is educate your husband and family with proofs and facts and ask for total support.
------------------ Luisa [img]/peanut/boards/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smile.gif[/img]
On Dec 29, 2004
Originally posted by BelindaA: [b]Also, I've read that some people trust Pillsbury slice and bake cookies. Last night I was making some of the chocalate chip for my kids (I don't eat it b/c I don't trust it) and there was a nut in it. It was either a walnut sliver or a pecan. I'm not sure which. Just thought I'd let you all know.[/b]
Belinda, welcome to the group, and I'm sorry you had to join us!
Have you contacted Pillsbury to let them know about the nut you found in their product? I'd really like to know what they say in response. Did you save that bit of dough or anything by any chance for testing?
On Dec 29, 2004
Sounds like you're having a rough time getting your family to help protect you. Does your dh think you're a worrier? Would talking to your doctor or allergist (assuming they take things seriously) be helpful? Maybe he's a facts kind of guy. Present him with some.
The last statistics I saw were around 30,000 ER visits a year and 150-200 deaths from food allergies. Check out foodallergy.org for some good facts if you haven't already.
I feel for you, if I were in your shoes, I'd be really upset. Maybe he just needs some time to digest what this means, or he doesn't want to believe how serious this can be. Sorry, just guessing here...
When we got my son's diagnosis, my dh's first response was, "ok, we'll avoid peanuts, no big deal". It took him a few days and then his father did some research and talked to him and it sunk in how serious it is.
Obviously, you need your family's support to help you feel safe and to prevent reactions. Good luck with everything. Post any questions you might have.
------------------ ***[b] ALLERGY ELIMINATOR*** [/b]
Meg, mom to: Matt 2 yrs. PA,MA,EA Sean 2 yrs. NKA
On Dec 29, 2004
Have you been tested or need any new tests done? Sometimes I think the family needs to hear it from the doctor how serious this allergy can be and what they recommend for your safety. Teach your 10 year old how to administer the epi-pen, just in case. Pracitce with an old one into a grapefruit. Buy peabutter or soybutter and have your family try it as an alternative. I have read where some families did a blind taste test and did not know it wasnt peanut butter. Good luck.
On Jan 6, 2005
Thanks everyone for the advice. Sorry, I haven't logged on in a few days.
My husband did go to the allergist with me once, but he acted like it still was nothing to worry about. I have printed out some info for him to read, and I tell him a lot about the allergy. He's always been the type to NEVER worry about anything. It's just going to take a LOT of me educating him over and over until he gets it.
I do have a list of instructions by the phone for my 10 year old in case something happens. He knows where my epi pens are, but I haven't shown him how to inject one in case I can't. That's a very good idea!
About the cookie dough, I haven't called Pillsbury. It happened at night, and then I just kept putting it off until I forgot. I will call them. That was the last of the dough, and my kids finished it off. I'll let ya'll know what they say.
I bought some soybutter last week, and I love it! My son took a teeny taste and said ugh!, but he didn't really give it a try. I did tell him the pb will be banned from our home, b/c I have to feel safe in my own home.
Sorry I'm replying to everyone at once. I haven't really looked at all the ways to reply or post.
Thank you all!!!
On Jan 6, 2005
Hi and welcome. I am also pretty paranoid about what my son eats. We have known about his PA for about 1.5 years. After we found out, it took us about 4 months to get all of the PB out of our house. He was only 2 so we kept it on a high shelf and my daughter only ate it occassionally. We also had a few may contains in the house which my son did not eat. But after a lot of reading and learning about contact and inhalation reactions, everything was removed from the house. Our allergist also told us we needed to get it out of the house or he was going to have a reaction eventually.
The Peanut Allergy Answer Book is pretty good and short. There are a lot of stories about people having reactions from contaminated sources and also how fast deadly reactions can occur. Perhaps your husband could read this book as well and maybe he will get the idea of how serious it is.
I would just tell him that PB won't be in the house anymore. If he wants to eat it away from the house fine, but he needs to let you know so he won't get you sick by kissing you.
I have a 12 year old daughter and she is great about the allergy. Definitely let your son practice and also review procedures with him regularly. I posted our action plan on the refrigerator which describes the symptoms of a reaction and how to use the EPI.
PB is good, but I really don't miss it at all. I can't bring myself to eat it anymore.
On Jan 6, 2005
I've got adult on-set allergies to peanuts and sesame seeds. I was married and had two kids when this all started.
I can completely understand your fear of being alone with your children and having a severe reaction. At first, we couldn't figure out what I was reacting to. I couldn't get off antihistamines long enough to get testing done, and I was reacting every day. My husband missed a lot of time at work. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/redface.gif[/img] He ended up having to book a few weeks off, just to babysit me so that I could NOT take antihistamine to get some testing done.
He also did a lot of travelling, all across Canada and occasionally in the US. Usually he would only be gone 3 - 5 days.
As I got more accustomed to what I could/could not eat, I got a lot more comfortable with him travelling. Now, I don't worry about it. (The two kids I had are now adults, and I have a six year old, so, I am still often alone with my child.)
I agree that it would be a good idea to teach your 10 year old how to use the epi-pen on you. My six year old has been trained on using the epi-pen - but because he carries his own. He is allergic to insect bites/stings.
I wanted to mention that there is an *adult forum* on the board. If you haven't yet, you might want to take a look at it.
btw, peanuts and sesame seeds are both banned from my home. I do allow *may contains*, although I don't eat them, and I'm careful not to let them actually touch anything I might eat.
Gotta run, be back lately.
On Jan 6, 2005
Thanks SuzyQ for the book!
Anna Marie, I felt like I was reading some of my own words. I have severe outside allergies, and I was also constantly having some kind of reaction. I would have to wait for my husband to be in town to stop taking my antihistamine in case I had a bad reaction. Before he started traveling, he was coming home from work a lot b/c of some reaction. I guess now that I've had all of my testing done, and learing so much, I can look forward to relaxing. (But I doubt it will be any time soon!)
Thanks! P.S. Anyone from Mississippi?
On Jan 7, 2005
[img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] Yes, over time you can relax.
btw, when my husband eats anything with peanuts, nuts, or sesame seeds - I sleep on the couch. Now, when he goes away on business, he has an affair with a box of Turtles. (the chocolate kind) Sometimes, when I know he'll be gone for several days - I hide a box of them in his bag.
On Jan 7, 2005
Originally posted by AnnaMarie: [b] [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] Yes, over time you can relax.
btw, when my husband eats anything with peanuts, nuts, or sesame seeds - I sleep on the couch. [/b]
[i]Good strategy[/i]. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img]
On Jan 8, 2005
Necessary strategy for me. I have had serious reactions from his sweat. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/redface.gif[/img]
He no longer eats peanuts or sesame seeds when at home. Well, not intentionally. He did eat something with sesame seeds in it and didn't realize until after he had eaten it. (Why the heck would someone grind up sesame seeds to put in a bread product???? I thought they were for texture not taste.) Anyway, when he got home he told me, so we slept separate for a few nights.
On Jan 8, 2005
Had yet another talk with my husband. Don't mean to sound dumb, but does DH stand for dear husband or d___n husband, b/c right now mine is not dear!
He's out of town, I wasn't feeling good. I've had a lot of problems with my throat swelling for the last two months. Finally found out it's from mono. Anyway, I was still paranoid, so I began once again talking to him about the severity of allergy attacks. He actually said I should be able to get a shot to cure me. I asked him if he zoned out when he was at the Dr.'s office with me b/c he said the same thing to the Dr. He said he rembered the Dr. telling him that there was no shot to cure this and it was very serious. I told him once again that the epi-pen is crucial, and if it's a reaction that goes beyond hives, that benadryl won't fix it. I've only had two ana reactions, and he was with me both times. I don't get hives. It goes straight to my throat. I get an excrutiating itching burning in my throat and deep in my ears like someone lit a torch in my throat, my throat swells, I start coughing, and my chest gets extremely tight. Both ana reactions have been within a few seconds of eating. He has seen both of them and taken me to the ER. He is driving me crazy! I told him the next time he came home I really needed him to read up and absorb this into his brain, b/c I can't afford his naievity! I can't get him to understand that if I'm alone and don't get my epi-pen in time that I could pass out and die. He thinks benadryl will cure it all!
Sorry, didn't mean to vent.
BTW, I did show my son how to inject the epi-pen on me. I just hate it that he is 10 and I have to put this all on him b/c he is the only one here old enough to understand since my husband is always out of town.
On Jan 8, 2005
My husband at times has given me a bad time about my food allergies.
One thing I have done is that every time I read about a death on here....I tell him about it and how it happened. I have noticed his resistence has lessened. We went to a wedding reception last month and he told me when they got the desserts with peanuts out...so we left and went shopping. He didn't even argue about it.
I, too, worry about having reaction when my family is gone...we live in the country...also worry about having reactions during snow storms.
Here are some good strategies for you to think about that I use...
First, have enough epi-pens to cover a trip to the hospital....an epi-pen lasts about 15-20 minutes.
Second, restrict your diet when you are alone to fresh vegetables, fruits and meats...no manufactured foods at all. (This is the way I eat 98% of the time, anyway.) Don't eat restaurant food at all.
Third, wash your hands a lot.
Fourth, wash all dishes in a dishwasher.
Fifth, don't allow any peanuts in the house. It has been a rule in house for years and it took some time but everyone complies with it now.
On Jan 9, 2005
Belinda - the d in dh stand for either, depends on the mood of the writer. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img]
This is [b]the[/b] place to vent. Do it as much as you need to.
Mostly my husband *gets* it. I saw my anaphylactic reaction through his eyes. It was my first sign that this was really serious - the look of terror in his eyes.
But then, sometimes, he kind of [i]forgets[/i]. (That's not really the right word, but, I'm just not thinkinging really clearly and forgets is the best I can come up with.)
Since we were married many years before I developed my allergies - sometimes he thinks they'll just *go away*. He thinks, maybe I should just try a bit. (He suggests doing this in a hospital, not at home - but I still won't do it.)
For him, the [i]refresher[/i] usually comes at work - not at home. A guy that works for him had an ana. reaction to a bee sting (he's fine). A co-worker had an ana. reaction to cross-contamination with a walnut (he's fine). And an out-of-town employee lost his wife to an ana-reaction (ate a doughnut that never used to have nuts in it). The guy described the entire thing in detail to my dh - not realizing that he was talking to someone who's wife has had an ana. reaction.
cathlina, you are an adult with pa? Do you allow may-contains in your home? I'm just curious. I do allow them in my home, but I don't eat them.
On Jan 13, 2005
It would be sad if your dh and mother only got it if you died from a recation. I'm lucky, my dh is very vigilent (he saw 1st hand a reaction 1 month after we started dating, been together nearly 20 years) and dd (also pa) is learning to be more careful. Only last Sat at dh mother's house dd checked the label of some biscuits and they said "contain peanuts". I immediately took the pack off her, we washed our hands, no reactions. I am however worried because the open packet went into the biscuit tin - cross contamination could be a problem unless the tin is washed properly. I will be checking this when we visit again. I hope that your family get it asap as there could be a tragedy for which they would never forgive themselves for.
On Jan 14, 2005
I called about the cookie dough. There's not really much they can tell me since I threw away the package. They did tell me that it didn't seem possible for that to happen, but will try to look into it.
Last night I broke out in hives after eating some bread I made with a new bag of flour. My dh is still out of town. I called my sister who is about 20 min. away to come over. I called my dh and he stayed on the phone with me while I took benadryl and to see if I was ok. After about 15 min., the hives started going away and nothing else happened. My dh has 2 cell phones, so on the other one he kept calling my sister to see where she was, and called around to neighbors to get my son home b/c I was alone with my 4yr. old. I was shocked at how concerned he was. He kept telling me to call the dr. or go to the dr. I kept telling him I didn't need to b/c nothing else was happening. My sister walked in, and I got off the phone with him. I was ok, but had to call the dr. anyway b/c dh kept insisting on it. Dh kept calling back to check on me, and he has called several times today. I was really surprised, I think he may be coming around.
Now my mother may be another story. My sister told her she was coming to my house and why. My mom did not call one time to see if I was ok. I sent a book home with my sis and marked the very imp. things, but told her to tell mom to read it. I just hope she does.
On Jan 18, 2005
First thanks again for responding to my intro thread. I just read yours for the first time and I am so sorry that you are going through this and feeling alone. It must be very scary when your husband travels and you begin to have a hive reaction. Luckily your kids are not babies - not that its any easier - but at least you can teach them to call for help if they need to.
Do you have a neighor close by that is aware of your situation? Someone the kids can call if they need help?
I'm glad your husband is starting to become more sensitive to all of it. I think some men have a different way of coping with things. Maybe his denial is beacause he's afraid to admit that he's scared.
Good luck to you. I hope it gets easier. And btw -- the DH thing was too funny. Lately mine has been more of a D--N H also!