new and petrified

Posted on: Mon, 07/05/2004 - 11:35am
melissa's picture
Joined: 07/05/2004 - 09:00

Hi everyone,
My 17 mo old DS has been egg allergic since 8 mos and is now confirmed peanut allergic. I have spent the weekend reading the posts on this site and am so glad I found you. We don't know anyone w/ this problem and I am so scared. How do you get past the idea that anything can hurt him and that he can never be out of your sight? I think I can pretty well control what food is in our house (unless something is mislabeled etc) but how do I keep him "normal", let him go to preschool, go to restaurants, go to school, church, etc and not go insane? I am just consumed w/ fear right now and don't know who to talk to . My DH says "we'll handle it"...not a big help. I'm just scared and worried and I want him to have a good life even w/ this problem. How did you all cope w/ this?
thanks so much, and I look forward to getting to know you all better.

Posted on: Mon, 07/05/2004 - 2:30pm
anonymous's picture
Joined: 05/28/2009 - 16:42

Welcome. Your story sounds very similar to mine. My son Cade was diagnosed egg allergic at 9 months old and peanut allergic right at 2 years. We have been living with PA for almost 2 1/2 years now and I like you at first was freaked out and occasionally now and then I still get that way. But as with all things new and different it becomes a way of life. PA is your life now and you will learn how to deal. Gather as much knowledge as you can. Read books - "The Peanut Allergy Answer Book" is a wonderful start and read these boards - you will find out so much here that even doctors don't know. Ask questions here. After a while you will become an "expert" in this field and you will gain a sense of authority by educating others around you about PA - especially those who will be caring for your child. Tell everyone and anyone who will listen about PA. Keep your home "safe" so you will have at least one place that you can feel relaxed. Pray when your child is not in sight and then pray some more. There has never been a day in the past 2 1/2 years that I have not thought about PA, but knowing what I know now about it I feel much more prepared and ready to handle a possible reaction.
Cade PA
Carson NKA

Posted on: Mon, 07/05/2004 - 9:49pm
anonymous's picture
Joined: 05/28/2009 - 16:42

It is okay to be scared and overwhelmed at first - that means you are taking this seriously and will do a good job at keeping your child safe!!
Our ds has a PA since 6 months old and he is now 9 1/2. His first reaction was to touch and his tests show him as severly allergic. He has never come into contact since.
The rules we follow are that nothing - absolutely nothing even with "may contain"- comes into our house. This is his safety zone. Find companies whose labelling you can trust and purchase their products.
Then you educate - your child - your family and then your pre-school and your school, etc. It can be hard and frustrating but it is worth it for your child.
I always feel that you are never given anything you can't handle. As you become more familiar you will feel better - some days you will panic, some days you will even have a good cry after you say no to a Birthday Party of a child whose parents you don't think understand the allergy - and other days you will sit for 4 hours at a birthday party of a school friend so your child can go.
It really will work out. Our ds is outgoing and a real clown - he knows what he can eat, what he can't, and when to ask.
Just take one day at a time.

Posted on: Tue, 07/06/2004 - 2:06am
mommyofmatt's picture
Joined: 03/12/2004 - 09:00

We've been dealing with the PA for 1 yr now, and at this point I feel pretty educated, so some of my anxiety is gone.
Now I'm starting to think about pre-school, and the anxiety is ramping back up, but that's what people seem to post about here. The anxiety seems to ebb and flow depending on the age and milestones of your children.
Unfortunately, you have plenty of company in the anxiety area. Hopefully that makes you feel better?!
I agree that educating yourself and your family and friends is the first step. It will help relieve some of your fears. Also, I agree with making your home a safe haven. I'm very relaxed at home.
You'll be able to tell who your biggest supporters are going to be, and they may surprise you. I've actually found more understanding from some people I've known a year, than from people I've known for 10 years.
I also found the Parents Guide to Food Allergies by Marianne Barber really helpful for dealing with multiple food allergies.
Good luck! It will get easier to manage with time. And, when you come across people who will really go out of their way for you and your child, you will feel incredibly blessed.
Meg, mom to:
Matt 2 yrs. PA,MA,EA
Sean 2 yrs. NKA

Posted on: Tue, 07/06/2004 - 4:10am
synthia's picture
Joined: 10/05/2002 - 09:00

You have gotten some good advice,we are all here to help feel free to ask any ?'s.
Take baby steps on the learning,try not to get burned out.
No Nutz for me, is a good book to start reading to your child [b]now[/b].
I will also sugg. a medic alert braclet.
The Peanut Allergy Answer Book by DR.Hugh Sampson is helpful for adults,another book I found to be helpful is-How To Manage Your Childs Life-Threatening Food Allergies by Linda Marienhoff Coss [url="http://www.FoodAllergyBooks.Com"]http://www.FoodAllergyBooks.Com[/url]
My E-mail is in my profile if you ever need it.
Look forward to your posts.
Love this site

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