It feels weird when the school does what you\'ve always wanted. . .

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Something happened last week and I found myself in a situation where I felt 'the baton' had finally been passed. Not completely. . . but I could feel a definite change.

Last week I made a mistake. . . I bought some mini-bags of pretzels for snacks and gave a bag to Mariah to snack on as she watched TV. It was a new brand for us, so as she was eating her first pretzel stick, Mariah started to read the ingredient label herself. Just to double check.

Sure enough: the bag was labeled 'may contain' as clear as day. I had missed it. I'd checked them at the grocery store, but missed it. <> We all felt uneasy. . . and grateful that Mariah caught my error.

We kept an eye on DD, and she didn't seem to have any symptoms that evening. Didn't treat.

The next morning around 10, I got a call on my cell phone from the School Nurse. Mariah was in her office, had some minor allergy symptoms and did I want her treated with benadryl due to the possible exposure the night before? She had thoroughly checked Mariah out, and went down her thorough list: no fever, no hives, peak-flow number, etc., etc.

I was so caught off guard. I'd never thought about the possibility of a delayed reaction the next day from a 'may contain'. [i]But the nurse did.[/i] [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

Since I hadn't considered the possibility of a delayed reaction, I never thought to mention it to the nurse. [i]But Mariah did.[/i] [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

When I picked Mariah up after school, she something that indicated how good the nurse is and then said that the nurse gave her a note to show her teachers the remainder of the day. A note? What note? Apparently the nurse thought to write a 'be aware' note saying that Mariah had a possible exposure and to please keep a close eye on her.

Wow. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] I'd never thought about the nurse notifying the teachers for this.

It was a wonderful and also very weird feeling. I'm so used to being the 'one' to think about what to do. The 'control freak'. Others were in place as a safety net, but never really utilized.

But this time, others (Mariah and the nurse) clearly showed that they were great at doing their jobs. They didn't consult me or ask for my permission, they just did it. Then informed me.

Weird. Very weird. I'm not used to this. I'm liking and not liking it all at the same time. Sorta like my brain doesn't know what to do. It's uncomfortable to feel so good. LOL! Can anyone relate?

On Oct 29, 2006

Can't really relate, but that is really amazing. It must be such a feeling like you haven't had in...say....years? The feeling like it's OK, even for a little bit. That's great to hear your dd and the nurse were really on top of it. Maybe this may contain situation was a way of showing you just how good things can really be...enjoy it while you can!!!

On Oct 29, 2006

"had some minor allergy symptoms and did I want her treated with benadryl due to the possible exposure the night before? She had thoroughly checked Mariah out, and went down her thorough list: no fever, no hives, peak-flow number, etc., etc."

What "minor allergy symptoms" did she have? If no hives, breathing issues, etc?

On Oct 29, 2006

I can relate...something similar happened to us once. The wonderful, but strange, feeling comes from a recognition that you've done a good job in training people on allergy awareness...and those people actually "got it!" Doesn't happen often, and usually takes "years," but it does happen.

On Oct 29, 2006

Quote:

Originally posted by mharasym: [b]What "minor allergy symptoms" did she have? [/b]

Nasal congestion and a cough.

On Oct 29, 2006

Wow, that is wonderful. Plus it is wonderful that Mariah caught your mistake. That happened to us once--dd caught my mistake, it was a shared equipment with milk issue. I felt really bad about it. It is great when they catch it though. The school nurse sounds very on the ball.

On Oct 29, 2006

Quote:

Originally posted by Donni: [b]I can relate...something similar happened to us once. The wonderful, but strange, feeling comes from a recognition that you've done a good job in training people on allergy awareness...and those people actually "got it!" Doesn't happen often, and usually takes "years," but it does happen.[/b]

I can take a little credit for having prepared Mariah well. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/redface.gif[/img]

But as for the nurse, this was clearly her nursing skills that came into play. Can't take an ounce of credit. I feel a little sheepish, that I hadn't remembered that a delayed reaction was a possibility.

On Oct 30, 2006

I messed up and fed my milk allergic son something with milk the other night. He had a mild reaction and I kept him home the next day, but he was very good about it and aware. The school teacher and office staff were also very sympathetic. It was almost a positive experience for us all to see that even if we screw up, if we treat the reaction quickly and correctly, things should usually be ok.

It's nice your daughter can feel comfortable at school and confident in her own ability to handle a situation.

On Oct 30, 2006

Sounds like Mom and Dad have done a fabulous job raising a very aware and careful daughter!

Congratulations!

On Oct 30, 2006

I would be so proud of Mariah to be so aware! Your school sounds truly amazing. I wish my DD's middle school was this considerate and caring. We have made some strides, but I'm still working on the nurse. I don't feel the warm and fuzzies with her at all.

On Oct 30, 2006

What a huge weight lifted for you, too-- to know that when the rubber hits the road, she really [i]will[/i] own her allergy. As much of a PITA it can be. Good for her!!

I already know you've told her this, but--

Way to be a [i]YOUNG WOMAN[/i] who knows how to take care of herself!! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

On Oct 30, 2006

Thanks everyone. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

I really am proud of Mariah, and for many reasons. [i]But[/i]. . .

Lately, she's determined to give me a hard time. Must be the age. (She'll be 13 next month.)

For example, just yesterday at an ice skating team party, she asked if she could eat a store bought cake from a bakery that we know is not safe. And also she asked if she could have a home-made cookie. When she got the answer from me that she knew she would (ummm. . [i]no[/i]), she asked me 'why'. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/rolleyes.gif[/img]

Our rules have been the same and consistently enforced for 12 years now. She knows them.

I think sometimes she just needs to give me a hard time just to remind me that the whole PA thing really stinks. She wants to be sure I realize this. At the time that something stinks and also later. And often.

Must be the age. <>

But yes, I do feel some relief that she has come through when she's needed to. . . namely, when I've dropped the ball. This isn't unusual for her. But it's still nice to see, and to acknowledge, especially in the midst of her recent intense need to question and challenge [i]everything[/i] right now.

I felt sheepish to have made the mistake(s), but it's bound to happen again. I anxiously try to remember everything related to her FAs, but I'm human. It feels good that everyone~ Mariah, me, the school nurse, all the school staff~ are all trying very hard to do their jobs. And that when someone makes a mistake, like I did (twice) last week, others are in place prepared to catch it. The whole 'village' concept.

[img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

[This message has been edited by Gail W (edited October 30, 2006).]

On Oct 30, 2006

gail: my daughters have been doing this lately too - asking for things that have always been a "no" in the past (like at bday parties or restaurants). it's usually when peers are present. i think they already know the answer when they ask but that they are just acting out their frustration a bit. what they don't understand is that it's so frustrating for us parents too. what we wouldn't give to be able to say "yes" to them so they could enjoy being a regular kid at a bday party or restaurant outing. it's tough for parents too, huh? i think they generally know that we are saying "no" because we love and care for them but i'm sure it frustrates them to face these issues in front of other kids. they'd just like to have all the normal experiences other kids get to have. i wish they understood that we really hate having to say no though.

On Oct 30, 2006

I hear you, joeybeth. I think it is definitely acting out frustration.

On Nov 1, 2006

Wow, I am so glad everything worked out for your daughter and it was a genuine response from the school to where they get it! It must have really made you feel good!

On Nov 1, 2006

Thanks pfmom2. It does feel good. Weird, but definitely good. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] Hard for me to let go . . .

Quote:

Originally posted by Gail W: [b]I hear you, joeybeth. I think it is definitely acting out frustration. [/b]

I asked Mariah about this and her response was, [i]"Well [b]yeah[/b]. I mean, is there anyone else that it's okay to be mad at? "[/i]

[This message has been edited by Gail W (edited November 01, 2006).]

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