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Posted on: Wed, 06/20/2007 - 12:27am
patsmommy's picture
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Joined: 10/31/2001 - 09:00

why didnt someone tell the poor kid it wasnt peanut butter?

Posted on: Wed, 06/20/2007 - 1:00am
Carefulmom's picture
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Joined: 01/03/2002 - 09:00

Even if it wasn`t pb, if a child doesn`t feel safe and the child has food allergies, he should not be forced to participate. I think it is wrong to tell him he had to participate when they knew he had food allergies. I can see where it would be hard for you to know what to believe, but even if it was not pb, I think the way they handled it was wrong. There are so many times dd has been told something is safe when it isn`t. I hope you get to the bottom of it.

Posted on: Wed, 06/20/2007 - 4:18am
SallyL's picture
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Joined: 02/20/2006 - 09:00

I certainly hope he was wrong and it wasn't PB! I had alot of other things I wanted to say but I'll zip my mouth if it wasn't actually PB. But yes - why didn't they just say that then??
I think though that he has learned an important lesson about standing up to adults. I know there is no way as a child I would have been able to! We teach our kids to listen to the adults/leaders in their lives. Most of the time they are the people keeping them safe - it must be super hard for a kid to stand up and say 'no' when truly necessary! It's a good reminder for me to teach my DD when she is older enough! Of course I'm sure it will just come out as "mommy says I don't have to listen to you!" LOL

Posted on: Wed, 06/20/2007 - 4:26am
chanda4's picture
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Joined: 12/14/2006 - 09:00

wow, I read your first post and though OMG!!!! Then your 2nd and thought, my son has done the same thing to me!!! He told me once they had pb cookies in class, so I ran tot he school to ask the teacher and she said they were sugar, and that my son got his *treat* instead of the sugar cookie. I felt like a jerk, but I didn't know, so who could blame me for freaking out a bit. It's hard, we have to trust our kids, but sometimes we have to double check with all involved before we get uspet. When he came home the next time I asked him a couple times, then emailed the teacher to get her side....
I hope they didn't use pb in their lesson, could you imagine. But it was good your son spoke to you, maybe next time the instructor can explain it with him so he understands what will be involved, or better yet, call you!!! HUGS
------------------
Chanda(mother of 4)
Sidney-8 (beef and chocolate, grasses, molds, weeds, guinea pig & asthma)
Jake-6 (peanut, all tree nuts, eggs, trees, grasses, weeds, molds, cats, dogs, guinea pig & eczema & asthma)
Carson-3 1/2 (milk, soy, egg, beef and pork, cats, dog, guinea pig and EE)
Savannah-1 (milk and egg)
Foster Mom to
Cody-10 (seasonal/environmental allergies)
Jordan-6 (also seasonal and environmental)

Posted on: Wed, 06/20/2007 - 6:02am
Jen224's picture
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Joined: 05/22/2006 - 09:00

Ok, even if this was just jelly and thank goodness his life was never in danger, this was an ideal opportunity to give your son the words and confidence he will need in the future to handle it *when* it happens for real. By "it," I mean dealing with PB in his environment when you're not there.
You did a fabulous job being calm and then later giving him some "fighting"/assertive words for himself.
Let us know what happens when he gets home today. I can see him easily thinking that jelly and PB just "go" together and he assumed it was there by association.

Posted on: Wed, 06/20/2007 - 12:21pm
NCPeanutMom's picture
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Joined: 07/22/2004 - 09:00

UPDATE:
I talked to ds after camp today. For once, I was glad for the 1/2 hour ride, so we had time with no interruptions. In short, there was no peanut butter. Of course, when asked why he told us there was pb, he said "I don't know". There was a trail mix, with Honey Nut Cheerios, but he said he told the man about his allergies, and he was told he did not have to eat them. Nor did he have to touch them or go near them.
There are still some unanswered questions I have, such as: Did the adult reiterate to him that it was just jelly, and no pb? But, since there was obviously no threat of pb, and it was ds who was mistaken, I do not plan to go into it further...especially since there are only 2 days left of camp. I told ds that he really has to be sure of the facts before he tells me that he "had to" do something with regards to pb. That I had emailed the camp director for no reason, and took up her valuable time. He seemed a little ashamed, which I guess is not a bad thing, if it helps him to remember.
I guess if I have to find a good thing (besides the fact that he never really was in any danger), is that I found a "loophole" so to speak, that we hadn't thought to address before. That is, him standing up to adults who may not realize the importance of him not having ANY contact with nut products. Hopefully that lesson will stick with him, as well.
Thank you all for listening. Only you could possibly understand how I felt when I first heard about this. Consider this another bullet dodged.

Posted on: Thu, 06/21/2007 - 12:34am
Carefulmom's picture
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Joined: 01/03/2002 - 09:00

I wonder if because jelly in someone`s home is commonly cross contaminated, at his young age, maybe he just made the association that jelly is unsafe for that reason? At 12 my dd would get it that a brand new jar of jelly is safe after she reads ingredients, but at 7 I think she might have thought jelly = peanut butter contamination, and might not have thought about it being a new jar. I have found that when my dd has given me wrong information, there was always a logical reason in her mind (not that she was correct, but she had a reason for believing something and she was not just making it up out of the blue).

Posted on: Thu, 06/21/2007 - 7:10am
Peg541's picture
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Joined: 12/29/2002 - 09:00

Is he trying to tell you he does not like camp? Does he need to talk about that? Maybe he does not feel safe or does not know how to tell you he is unhappy. 7 is young and it's tough to put things into words. Maybe he misses you. Etc etc.
Peg

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