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Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 3:58am
lilpig99's picture
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gymom, that just stinks. I am so sorry.
you may just show him the err of the doctors ways...so sorry you have to prove this to him.

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 5:55am
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Dear gymom,
I wanted to respond to the topic about not sending in safe treats. We are in the middle of an ugly battle and were told that the school didn't have to detail anything about birthdays and celebrations in my child's IHCP because my child has a "safe treat box", and that the districts policy states the child have a this. Our district is trying to use the "safe treat box" to get away with not having to contact me prior to parties. It is allowing them to exclude my child. I would like to send in a similar treat for my child on those party days, but since he has the "safe treat box" they don't feel it's necessary. So I do feel that this is a way out for at least my district. The question I have is why does my child have to eat, lets say a bag of pretzels when everyone else is enjoying that beautiful, decorated, over the top, frosting covered cupcake. This is not acceptable to me and I will do everything in my power to not let my child be treated this way. I will not stop advocating for the rights of my child to attend school as safely as other children and to be included in all areas of the day. My child deserves to be treated equaly and to date this has not happened. We are in a situation where my child will not be starting off the school year. I, as the parent, have the right and the duty to protect my child from any unsafe enviornment.
I'm not saying that we should or shouldn't send in the "safe treat box". I just wanted to share what is happening in our situation. Our district is using this against us.

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 5:57am
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[url="http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/Forum7/HTML/000894.html"]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/Forum7/HTML/000894.html[/url]

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 8:30am
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[url="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TLmpL2AzLs"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TLmpL2AzLs[/url]
....felt a bit apropos....

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 10:29am
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The moving nail walls.
Yup.
And I am soooo there on the back of the police cruiser grabbing a beverage in the bar drive thru.
Thank you!
~Eliz

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 3:47pm
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Quote:Originally posted by The #l Mouser!:
[b]
ajasfolks, gvmom, please read this thread, (paying in particular attention to [b]The Cupcake Incident[/b], which involved a "circumvent the plan" strategy, much similiar to the one Z describes. Probably exactly the same.
[url="http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/Forum7/HTML/001880.html"]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/Forum7/HTML/001880.html[/url]
gvmom, I believe the 3 page interaction in that thread lay at the very heart of this thread. I'm noting with glee, once again, that I managed to get the premeditated violation of my child's IEP documented as [i]an incident report[/i] and placed on permanent file/record. Still remembering the teacher telling me in plain view/earshot [i]of the office staff and visitors[/i].: "I'd do it again."
U-huh. Yeah, sure you would. I bet.
And I'm no betting woman.[/b]
Interesting to re-read this thread after a few years. I remain in agreement w/Gail W that providing a substitute treat is comparable in the eyes of the law and not a violation.
Irrespective of that, though, as others have mentioned, [b]the crux of the issue here is that gvmom's 504 was violated and they were not held accountable.[/b] Plain and simple. It's clear that gvmom will be more direct in addressing violations head on to ensure accountability. No more learning curve...
gvmom - I'm sorry that the principal has turned out to be more of a lemon than a true gift, at least in terms of PA awareness and support. [i]Could a new principal, though, ultimately be a good thing?[/i]
I would recommend that rather than a full-court press on trying to re-educate her on PA best practices right now, you couch things under the premise that PA treatment/protocols are individualized, and everything re: your 504 and DS is based on medical advice from [b]your allergist[/b] treating the particulars of [b]your[/b] son's situation. That minimizes the risk of taking the focus off your child and his 504 to broader issues which could muddy the waters.

Posted on: Fri, 08/24/2007 - 7:52am
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Quote:Originally posted by gvmom:
Keep your optimism. Cling to it ferociously. I have optimism too. But, don

Posted on: Fri, 08/24/2007 - 9:52am
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Quote:Originally posted by ceross:
[b] This may a bit OT but I'll share this: We changed DD's allergist to Dr. Robert Wood and saw him for the first time this year. I brought up the issue of obtaining a 504 for DD because their had been a couple of issues last year. He essentially said that the 504 is not going to make them any more compliant and I read into his comments that day that he probably felt it not necessary.[/b]
That's because IMO schools violate the law not out of malicious intentions, but out of ignorance.
I would imagine that Dr. Wood is aware of his obligations under which he practices his profession. And that the thought that schools would be motivated by fear of litigation is abhorent to him.
Unfortunately, that is often not the case with schools. I mean, it was only when we finally had a 504 evalution that the light bulbs began to turn on and the school began to understand what its obligation was under the law.

Posted on: Fri, 08/24/2007 - 10:53am
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Quote:Originally posted by Gail W:
[b] That's because IMO schools violate the law not out of malicious intentions, but out of ignorance. [/b]
yes, those were my first thoughts when I read that. it's also part of the reason I went the "incident report" route/chain of command years ago instead of proceeding directly to Due Process.
Quote:[b]I would imagine that Dr. Wood is aware of his obligations under which he practices his profession. And that the thought that schools would be motivated by fear of litigation is abhorent to him.[/b]
Can we say this fits me to a "T" as well? I'm just not used to the mentality that is so pervasive in the school districts. That they [i]mistakenly[/i] believe that there is safety in ignorance. I don't now how to put it.....that for instance, "If mom and dad aren't concerned, or refuse care, then I'm automatically homefree of that responsibility too."
Personally? I find it telling that [i]even as a parent who homeschooled[/i], I find the ginormous amount of "homework" that comes home in the book bag [i]shocking.[/i] Can't figure out why they need my children six hours a day, five days a week if that's what's comming home. I can only pity the children who's parents aren't prepared (financially, emotionally, physically, mentally) to deal with it.
Quote:[b]Unfortunately, that is often not the case with schools. I mean, it was only when we finally had a 504 evalution that the light bulbs began to turn on and the school began to understand what its obligation was under the law.
[/b]
Yes, after getting over my shock, hurt, loathing, anger, resentment, and self pity, I was able to deal effectively and [i]fairly[/i] with my school district. It certainly wasn't easy, and somehow, I managed to do it without anti-paranoia pills. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img]
I decided to be a mentor, not a menace. Pro-active, not re-active. There is satisfaction and a sense of peace in that.

Posted on: Fri, 08/24/2007 - 11:27am
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Quote:Originally posted by Gail W:
[b]Unfortunately, that is often not the case with schools. I mean, it was only when we finally had a 504 evalution that the light bulbs began to turn on and the school began to understand what its obligation was under the law. [/b]
I would say that was likely the case for our school system which was sued by a diabetic child's family and had to put in place processes for dealing with children with medical issues. There are fairly uniform processes in place in our district but I still have to be vigilant.
I actually think for us the PTO is a big problem. Most of their events are actually allergy-aware but they sell Gertrude Hawk chocolates (I didn't let DD participate on that on the basis of the nut issue but I'm also opposed to using kids to schill products). As a reward for selling the most chocolate, the winning class got a chocolate fountain. That's unfair to kids with allergies or who might be diabetic or on a Feingold diet and it's risky. Thankfully, DD's class did not win last year but you can be certain I would have raised a stink if they had.
This is definitely OT to a degree but I'm a bit more concerned this year about a law that VA passed that requires day care workers to be trained by an RN/LPN in the Epi-Pen. First let me say that I think it's great to require training by a nurse in this. The problem is that there is a shortage of trainers/classes and not all caregivers can/will get trained in time. I'm curious to see how this shakes out with DD and aftercare; she has to ride the day care center bus to the center each day and that is one area where I could see the person would not likely be trained.

Posted on: Sun, 08/26/2007 - 12:11am
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Quote:Originally posted by The #l Mouser!:
[b]
After that incident, I really started investing some strategy into writing the food allergy accommodations with [i]goals[/i] included. Like "(Student name) will safely participate in an environment as outlined in his physician letter with peers for all celebrations, birthdays, holidays, rewards, class or extracurricular activities. He will not be excluded due to his disability of a Life Threatening Food Allergy or Asthma." (paraphrased from memory)
Just in case people aren't good at interpreting what the "accommodation" should translate too. Goals are very powerful. Equally as powerful, if not more powerful than the accommodation itself. Then you can say: "Hey, does this picture (ie: celebration) look like that picture (goal)?" if not....you can say:
"Make it so. Do what you gotta do, but make it so." It removes the onus of you having to anticipate every snake-like movement.
Sure, goals are part of the normal IEP process (and I'd expect them to be for a 504 as well), but I was accustomed to them long before I ever heard the expressions IEP or 504. It's what I do. Measuring [i]outcomes[/i] is part of the Nursing Process. the "As Evidenced by" part. I chart on them every shift. It leaves one with a sense of accountability. Goals....
[/b]
Just wanted to say thank you for this post & also the earlier link to Cupcake Incident. (I recall reading that thread when it all first happened, but it is hard to really grasp the situation and details until you have kids in B&M school yourself & are dealing with similar situations.)
Your strategy (goal & "picture" oriented, measuring outcomes) has been very helpful as I compile our info & formulate our strategy for working with school. Just [i]getting[/i] the school (& assorted other "players") to even visualize that we are [i]on the same team[/i] can be very frustrating and difficult when the personality of the principal/dean is one of [i]gatekeeper[/i] who in fact fancies him/herself as the "manager" of even the parents, not just of the employees of the school.
When the principal stiff-arms or dismisses the parents from the get-go, even if the initial requests for 504 &/or accomodations are made graciously but firmly, then the adversarial atmosphere can be very difficult to overcome. I dare say, in some cases, impossible. In all honesty, I find having the door flat slammed in my face preferable to being patted on the head & condescendingly told that I'm simply a "worrying mommy who needs to get a grip" & that only the school knows what's best for my child.
But maybe that's just me.
~Elizabeth

Posted on: Sun, 08/26/2007 - 2:25am
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[b]When the principal stiff-arms or dismisses the parents from the get-go, even if the initial requests for 504 &/or accomodations are made graciously but firmly, then the adversarial atmosphere can be very difficult to overcome. I dare say, in some cases, impossible. In all honesty, I find having the door flat slammed in my face preferable to being patted on the head & condescendingly told that I'm simply a "worrying mommy who needs to get a grip" & that only the school knows what's best for my child.
But maybe that's just me.[/b]
I have suggestions for this. But am still swamped. School starts tomorrow. It looks like my boys will be at least going for the time up until lunch. Can't really get into details. But it isn't because people weren't cooperating.
Lots to update, but it'll have to wait. I am incredibly guarded. Skeptically optimistic. If things go like they are supposed to as a result of our meeting with the district on Friday, things will be better having actually gotten a new principal and involved the district. Getting the district there though, and I mean just even physically, was like moving a mountain. Lots about getting that to happen too.
Learning a lot. Very practical things coming up too.
Again, though. One thing is said. What actually happens is another.
But, I just can't get together a good post about it all right now. Too many documents, letters and school things to get done just for tomorrow! My baby is headed off to K too, and I am nearly heartbroken. I've wanted some time to me, after 7 years, and now that it is here the prospect of not hearing shuffling legos, or little stompy feet, throughout the day is making me on the verge of tears all the time! Both boys in school all day.... I'm really not ready yet.
OH, BTW, still NO SAFE SNACK BOX. It hasn't even been brought up by either teacher. Wasn't even suggested, floated by, or whatever, in any way, shape or form by anyone. Entertaining the idea of sanctioned exclusion, with anything, did not even cross the table.
I can say, off the top of my head, good emails to find out, make a cc list including all on, are the following:
Principal
504Compliance Officer
District Nurse
--the Principals boss-- ours has an odd title -- special to the district
Special Ed Director
Superintendant
OH, and if you get replies, and people like, say, a city attorney, are added on to the CC list by anyone, make sure they stay on your CC list too.
Now, gotta run. Lots to do, little time. Will try to get back and give you all something more substantial. But I have to get through tomorrow.
Have suggestions about 504 format too. Might be helpful.
NO SAFE SNACK BOX.
GET A 504 NO MATTER WHAT YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS WITH THE SCHOOL. THINGS CAN CHANGE IN A NEW YORK MINUTE WHILE YOU ARE COUNTING YOUR LUCKY STARS.

Posted on: Sun, 08/26/2007 - 2:46am
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gvmom, I'm hoping your day goes well tomorrow. Hang in there.

Posted on: Sun, 08/26/2007 - 3:16am
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Anonymous (not verified)

gvmom, I hope your day goes well tomorrow too. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
Up-date us if and when you get the chance. You do have a lot on your plate right now.
{{{{{BIG HUGS}}}}}
Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
------------------
There but for the Grace of God, go I.

Posted on: Sun, 08/26/2007 - 3:58am
Adele's picture
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Good luck tomorrow. I'll be thinking about you and the kiddos.

Posted on: Sun, 08/26/2007 - 8:28am
Corvallis Mom's picture
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gvmom, I'll be thinking of you tomorrow. (And keeping my fingers crossed. Maybe I should do toes too... [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img] )
[i]Always HOPE for the best, but prepare for the worst, right?[/i]

Posted on: Sun, 08/26/2007 - 10:29am
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Quote:Originally posted by ajas_folks:
[b] Just wanted to say thank you for this post & also the earlier link to Cupcake Incident. (I recall reading that thread when it all first happened, but it is hard to really grasp the situation and details until you have kids in B&M school yourself & are dealing with similar situations.)[/b]
verily. I find verbal descriptions/directions the most difficult, nearly impossible. I just smile and nod. Then written language.
But [i]show[/i] me, and I'm a scholar. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
to quote myself [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img] from "The Cupcake Incident" (starts down on page one a bit) and to help gvmom gird her loins [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img] to face the challenge ahead:
[b]"THERE IS NO PROVISION FOR AN ALTERNATE TREAT. THERE SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN AN *NEED* FOR IT."[/b]
Quote:Originally posted by ajas_folks:
[b]When the principal stiff-arms or dismisses the parents from the get-go, even if the initial requests for 504 &/or accomodations are made graciously but firmly, then the adversarial atmosphere can be very difficult to overcome. I dare say, in some cases, impossible. In all honesty, I find having the door flat slammed in my face preferable to being patted on the head & condescendingly told that I'm simply a "worrying mommy who needs to get a grip" & that only the school knows what's best for my child.
But maybe that's just me.
~Elizabeth
[/b]
until I got to the bottom and read your name, I half expected to see it was a quote from me. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img]
[This message has been edited by The #l Mouser! (edited August 26, 2007).]

Posted on: Tue, 08/28/2007 - 2:16am
Corvallis Mom's picture
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GVmom, how are things going there?
(Just worrying not to have seen anything in a few days-- and wondering how you're holding up.)
[img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

Posted on: Tue, 08/28/2007 - 2:36am
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i've been peeking in here too, hoping to read something positive from gvmom. . .

Posted on: Tue, 08/28/2007 - 2:46am
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awaiting your return here as well...

Posted on: Tue, 08/28/2007 - 3:05am
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me too [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

Posted on: Tue, 08/28/2007 - 11:40am
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Hoping that things are O.K....

Posted on: Tue, 08/28/2007 - 6:27pm
gvmom's picture
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Well, it is 1:21 am, and I had intended to write up a post. I am too beat though to get to what I really wanted to. That will have to wait until tomorrow.
Things are okay. I think I am in a waiting pattern. Not letting myself feel anything now, one way or the other. I would guess that some might think lots of stuff was good news, but that is what I thought of the beginning of last year too.
Thanks to you guys though for thinking of me. You all are the best!!!!
And, you know, I really do have some stuff that I want to put here. I think it is important. Just like the whole safe snack issue, lots of stuff has happened that really has kind of altered, or shaped, squished around maybe?, my thoughts on things.

Posted on: Tue, 08/28/2007 - 10:43pm
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Thanks for the update. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
I think it's good, in general, to be cautious. . .

Posted on: Tue, 08/28/2007 - 11:09pm
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Hang in there...just checking in to see how things are going.

Posted on: Wed, 08/29/2007 - 1:58pm
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Anonymous (not verified)

There is a fairly good article (IMPHO) about food in the classroom in the new issue of Allergic Living Magazine which I received to-day. I checked their website tonight to see if I could link the article here, but their old issue is still up. It does contain a couple of quotes from the woman from FAAN (A. M-F or A. F-M - I'm sorry, I can't remember her name right now).
I'll try to at least get the quotes on here over the next few days.
Allergic Living Magazine also has some really great links to a lot of resources, products, etc. (sorry, gvmom, nothing to do with this discussion) and I'll try and post those as well.
Also, a Canadian grocery store chain (so no name really) has come out with a peanut free breakfast bar.
Lots of stuff to post from the mag - but I really wish that one article had been on-line now.
Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
------------------
There but for the Grace of God, go I.

Posted on: Thu, 08/30/2007 - 12:01am
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It's good to hear things didn't start off with a horrible bang. Thanks for the update.

Posted on: Tue, 09/04/2007 - 12:01pm
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Just wanted to say everyone's input in this thread really got my wheels going in the right direction. I'm happy to report that a letter from the school nurse is going out today informing parents that celebrations will be food-free for my ds' grade [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img] Wish me luck after people see the letter!
gvmom, I'm getting the impression things are moving in the right direction for you. I hope that's the case, and it continues! Meg

Posted on: Thu, 09/13/2007 - 2:35pm
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For me and my journey with PA, this has been the [b] single most pivotal thread [/b]at PA.com.
Thank you all. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
~Elizabeth

Posted on: Thu, 09/13/2007 - 2:51pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

That article I referred to from Allergic Living magazine:-
[url="http://www.allergicliving.com/features.asp?copy_id=127"]http://www.allergicliving.com/features.asp?copy_id=127[/url]
Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
------------------
There but for the Grace of God, go I.

Posted on: Fri, 09/14/2007 - 6:59am
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[b]For me and my journey with PA, this has been the single most pivotal thread at PA.com.[/b]
I want to thank you for saying that. I hesitated starting the thread a bit. Just given things.
Thank you for your contribution, and for the contributions of others in this thread as well.

Posted on: Fri, 09/14/2007 - 9:41am
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I would agree with eliz. I'm glad I was here to be in on it if even a little bit.

Posted on: Thu, 09/20/2007 - 4:18pm
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Reraising and hoping others from Main Discussion read through....
Thanks to all for this thread---pointing out the obvious that could no longer be ignored.

Posted on: Thu, 09/20/2007 - 8:50pm
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I have read this thread with interest.
From my UK view, and experience , schools that deal with children from 4 1/2- rising 11 seem more allergy aware these days.
From the law point of view there isnt really much at all.
The education aurthority produce recommended guidelines which they are expect to follow within the indivdual head teachers guiding.
As a parent I CANT jump up and down and demand wide spread change,( there is nothing to solid to back me up) and for the most severely multiple allergic, there will never be the money for a personal aid, even during the early years.
We can ask for a policy, and follow the guidelines and pray that the comunity school nurse is well informed about allergies. But for the main part, all they understand is the emergency procedures, little is understood about preventing a reaction.
The anaphylaxis campaign is doing sterling work in this area, but it going to take years and years for this to filter down.
The worst part of our childrens lives is the high school years, from 11 onwards.
Our son school currently doenst have a indivdual policy, but has three school nurses, all have snippets of allergy understanding.
The children are on there own, from the beginging.
I do dream of having a law that I can have, stand with and demand to have.
But currently we have nothing, and hope on the good will of others .
I must dash off to work now, but will add some more views later on!!
sarah

Posted on: Fri, 09/21/2007 - 6:06am
gvmom's picture
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Thank you PinkPoodle, and thank you for your post Williamsmummy. I feel like this is an important topic, and have more that I feel that I should add. Given the nature of it though, and certain things in my own personal situation I have to be careful of at this point, I can't really post it without having the ability to edit.
I would urge people to really think about why they do things the way they do. The issue of consistency and accountability.
What you require of one, you must require of yourself as well.
It isn't the easiest position to take, for sure.
And while the board is under construction, I'd like to offer my email for those of you who might have questions that I could comfortably answer offline. [email]gvbmom@yahoo.com[/email]

Posted on: Sat, 06/14/2008 - 3:13pm
ajas_folks's picture
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.

Posted on: Mon, 07/14/2008 - 8:56am
ajas_folks's picture
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Originally Posted By: gvmom
I would urge people to really think about why they do things the way they do. The issue of consistency and accountability.
What you require of one, you must require of yourself as well.
It isn't the easiest position to take, for sure.
This discussion continues in various forms on boards at
[url="http://foodallergysupport.com"]http://foodallergysupport.com[/url]

Posted on: Sun, 11/02/2008 - 7:04am
ajas_folks's picture
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[i][b]Deserves the front page in Schools.
ALWAYS WILL.[/b][/i]

Posted on: Wed, 11/19/2008 - 9:27am
ajas_folks's picture
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bump

Posted on: Mon, 10/26/2009 - 12:41pm
DonnaReed's picture
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Suggested reading for those struggling with schools . . .
Food-free classrooms should be the goal for ALL children, not just those with life-threatening food allergies.
Refusing to accommodate the school's use of food may sometimes be the best option.

Posted on: Sun, 10/03/2010 - 1:15pm
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Everyone here needs to read and re-read.
Children are excluded if we are complicit in the exclusion.
Enable the food use and enable the discrimination, for your own child and others as well -- now and for years to come.

Posted on: Mon, 11/15/2010 - 2:32am
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My son has a peanut allergy and we always have to watch what enters our house or what we send to school. So I was delighted when I found www.grandpascoffeecakes.com
We just received our large banana chocolate chip coffee cake that has no nuts (dairy free too). My son loved every last crumb of that cake which my family polished off in a couple of days. I saw that they had portion control sizes on their site so I will order a bunch of those and freeze them till needed. I am thrilled grandpascoffeecakes.com is a dedicated no nuts bakery so I don't have to worry. I hope your experience will be as positive as mine was.

Posted on: Wed, 05/11/2011 - 1:46pm
DonnaReed's picture
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Joined: 02/20/2009 - 11:16

(Please ignore the idiotic food-hawking SPAM post above. This site doesn't seem to monitor those.)
Re-raising for current conversations as part of Food Allergy Awareness Week.
Be AWARE of how you enable the discrimination and potential risk to EVERY child when you provide supposed "safe" treats . . . for your own child or the "entire" class . . .
EXCLUDE THE FOOD, NOT THE CHILD!

Posted on: Thu, 06/09/2011 - 10:36pm
crazytwinmom's picture
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Joined: 04/05/2011 - 19:54

I think you all might be overreacting. I have a peanut allergic son. I was all too happy to send in some safe treats for the lunch lady to keep in the kitchen at his preschool. I sent prepackaged oreos, chips ahoy. He loves those cookies and since we don't give him sweets constantly, it is a treat to him to get them. If a parent brought in something he could not eat, then they gave him the cookies. He never complained or looked unhappy about it.
In fact, there is a picture of the Valentine's party and some parent brought in store bought cookies that were processed with peanuts. So in the picture you see my son eating his oreo while the other kids eat the fancy Valentine cookies. He didn't look sad though. In the picture he was grinning ear to ear.
I think it is all about attitude. My son has had this allergy since birth. We just made it a way of life for him. You will not be able to have what everyone else has all the time. He totally accepts that. Maybe its because I am a vegetarian when everyone else I know is not. But its not a huge deal to me either. I often have had to make do with my vegetarianism. As long as I have something to eat I am usually happy.
My husband also has a shellfish allergy so we have been dealing with the food allergy issue long before we had our sons. I don't think it is all about making things 100% equal. Life is not like that. The sooner kids learn that the better.
My son is totally happy and is very accepted by his peers. As long as the kid gets some kind of treat they enjoy does it matter if it is not the exact same thing as everyone else? When their birthday came I sent in safe cupcakes for them. He got to eat that one. For class parties I try to sign up for cookies so I can make sure to get fancy cookies he can eat. But if not, he can just eat his oreos or chips ahoy.
We went to a lot of birthday parties and I always brought him oreos. He used to have an egg allergy too but outgrew it. He actually thought he was lucky because he got his oreos right away and did not have to wait on the birthday cake to get passed down the line to him.
You can't control everyone else. You can only control yourself. We just adjust and move on. My son is not going to need therapy over this. That is just silly. Now maybe if he had to sit there and get no treat, he might. But that is why I send in a safe treat. He is not missing out on anything that way.

Posted on: Tue, 10/14/2014 - 5:14am
DonnaReed's picture
Offline
Joined: 02/20/2009 - 11:16

Bumping.
Because there is NO excuse to NOT INCLUDE the child! And enabling the school to exclude by offering them a "safe treat" out on the LTFA parents' back is just plain wrong.
Food-free classrooms, rewards, incentives, manipulatives, treats, parties, celebrations in school.
Period!

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