135 posts / 0 new
Last post
Posted on: Sun, 10/08/2006 - 7:58am
MommaBear's picture
Offline
Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by Corvallis Mom:
[b]Becca makes an excellent point that I think bears repeating. (Though I know not all scouting experiences are like this, okay? I [i]know.[/i] )
Why would I WANT my daughter to be involved in a social situation in which the "Queen Bee" rules with her court? Emphasizing catty traditional "female" behaviors? I don't, and that's a fact. [/b]
[i]thank you[/i]. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/cool.gif[/img] It's also so [i]backwards[/i] to publish a mission statement unless it's the [i]status quo[/i] already. Not needing [i]infiltration[/i]....depending on the luck of getting a [i]volunteer[/i] who's willing to back it up.
Backwards, I tell ya.

Posted on: Sun, 10/08/2006 - 9:19am
Christabelle's picture
Offline
Joined: 10/03/2004 - 09:00

I think the GSs are way overrated, too. But there is this aspect - if you aren't involved in a troop at our school, you really are an outcast.
The rebel in me says so what - or, even - good,
but the reality is different for my child. She doesn't want to make a social statement on noncomformity - she wants to make friends like the other little girls.

Posted on: Sun, 10/08/2006 - 9:53am
MommaBear's picture
Offline
Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by Christabelle:
[b]I think the GSs are way overrated, too. But there is this aspect - if you aren't involved in a troop at our school, you really are an outcast.
[/b]
you just got to ask yourself, "What the **** is going on philosophy wise that makes it this way??"
I'm with Becca: [b]"These volunteer things will vary greatly from town to town, clique to clique. Face it. Its just the way the social circles go and life goes. The whole "Queen Bee" thing carries on into adulthood. Period.
I am not sure how I always feel about the exclusive girly things anyway. I was never that kind of girl, and I just want my dd to be happy and have fun. She wanted this, and I let her try. Now we might have to consider the heartbreak of it not working out." [/b]
Personally speaking and not as advice, I [i]was[/i] the outcast and probably still am. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/cool.gif[/img]
IMHO, my mother and father spent too much time worrying about the consequences.....sure, it hurt, but now.....[i]I'm a much stronger person[/i]----I have difficulty feeling [i]vulnerability[/i]. Maybe it's a fault, but I always forget failure is a possibility. As much as my parent's fretted about my feelings, they seemed to have succeeded in building my self esteem despite that circumstance.
I'll empathize with my children, console them, be [i]overly-involved[/i] in their lives [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img], make it up to them, but I refuse to assist them in validating groups that create that atmosphere by paving a path to them or through them...or forbid, [i]increasing their membership[/i].
...maybe it's just me. But some lessons are best learned young and are [i]inevitable[/i]. There is formidable strength in the resolve acquiescing to one's individual identity brings. Now that is something I want to ensure my children experience. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] That is something worth fighting for. Suffering over, even. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
I know what I speak of. There is no way my children can escape it, even if I assisted them to. Inevitability. It's everywhere.
~no advice, just personally speaking. I think like a rebel [i]and[/i] and outcast. People tell me I make their heads spin.

Posted on: Sun, 10/08/2006 - 10:26am
Jana R's picture
Offline
Joined: 02/09/1999 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by MommaBear:
[b] It's also so [i]backwards[/i] to publish a mission statement unless it's the [i]status quo[/i] already. Not needing [i]infiltration[/i]....depending on the luck of getting a [i]volunteer[/i] who's willing to back it up.
Backwards, I tell ya.
[/b]
Wouldn't that be great if that were the case in reality? [i]in a perfect world . . . .[/i]
I've also seen issues in churches and PTSA (just two that come to the top of my head) that have written verbiage that needs someone to step to the plate to make it true for a particular situation. Scouts, churches, PTSA programs coordinated by time strapped volunteers - maybe with agendas of their own maybe not (but then when I volunteer for something, don't I have an agenda? Sure, I try to be fair . . . ) When someone says to a volunteer leader, you should be doing it this way yet doesn't volunteer to make so just sounds like whiners. I'm sure it's happened to all of us in our various leadership roles forced on us when someone else wanted you to take on their agenda yet didn't want to step to the plate in a leadership role. Doesn't go over well. Nobody else will fight your battle. Right or wrong.
I'm just sayin' . . . .

Posted on: Sun, 10/08/2006 - 11:46am
Corvallis Mom's picture
Offline
Joined: 05/22/2001 - 09:00

I hear ya, Jana. And I agree-- to a point. I have tried to "volunteer" our way into inclusion in a few cases. AND been thoroughly rebuffed. I might have even had my feelings deeply hurt if I hadn't (as MB evidently has [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img] ) learned that particular lesson early on. It is a very painful lesson to learn as a child, I know. But the nice thing is that resiliance is a more useful trait as an adult than conformity. (Baaaaa-aaaa.)
Some people just don't like being told ANYTHING by an "outsider." Even one who wants to volunteer.
But I understand that there are cases where your other social opportunities may be so limited that GS offers one of the few options. In that case, I guess you have to fight for it.
I personally wouldn't. But that is my hang-up about cookie sales. In our area, you are obligated to sell, and I will not have it. I know some of the local leaders, and they [i]are[/i] good people... but GS isn't a public institution. In other words, you can't FORCE them to do it.

Posted on: Sun, 10/08/2006 - 12:36pm
becca's picture
Offline
Joined: 05/22/2001 - 09:00

It will go well or it will not. I will not be fighting hard to make GS the right thing for my dd. Either it is, or it isn't. She has enough interests as it is. She wanted to do it, and we have given her the opportunity. In our community, it does not seem huge, not at our school, anyway. This one troop of 12 is it for the moment, out of 3 classes at our grade level. So there are around 48 gals declining to join.
Dd will not be an outcast. At least not because of GS, anyway, LOL! becca

Posted on: Sun, 10/08/2006 - 12:48pm
joeybeth's picture
Offline
Joined: 09/01/2006 - 09:00

guess i'm lucky that girlscouts are not a big deal in our area. i don't know a single one of my two PA girls' friends who belong.

Posted on: Sun, 10/08/2006 - 12:50pm
MommaBear's picture
Offline
Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by Jana R:
[b] Wouldn't that be great if that were the case in reality? [i]in a perfect world . . . .[/i]
I've also seen issues in churches and PTSA (just two that come to the top of my head) that have written verbiage that needs someone to step to the plate to make it true for a particular situation. Scouts, churches, PTSA programs coordinated by time strapped volunteers - maybe with agendas of their own maybe not (but then when I volunteer for something, don't I have an agenda? Sure, I try to be fair . . . ) When someone says to a volunteer leader, you should be doing it this way yet doesn't volunteer to make so just sounds like whiners. I'm sure it's happened to all of us in our various leadership roles forced on us when someone else wanted you to take on their agenda yet didn't want to step to the plate in a leadership role. Doesn't go over well. Nobody else will fight your battle. Right or wrong.
I'm just sayin' . . . .
[/b]
Hey, sure as **** it can be reality [i]and[/i] backwards. Completely agree......the world is littered with examples. Just because someone doesn't give a round of applause condoning them, doesn't mean they are whiners. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/tongue.gif[/img]

Posted on: Sun, 10/08/2006 - 1:00pm
krc's picture
krc
Offline
Joined: 01/16/2007 - 09:00

Girl Scouts are not a big deal around here either. My dd not being a part of this organization will never make her an "Outcast". Please....
What are we feeding our children that they feel they have to part of this to be accepted?
I'm sorry...don't mean to seem angry but the NUMBER ONE thing I try to teach my child is to be her own person. She has already learned this lesson...the first time she couldn't eat the cake, or the cupcake. We don't all have to be the same. KWIM? And that is ok.

Posted on: Sun, 10/08/2006 - 1:14pm
MommaBear's picture
Offline
Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by Corvallis Mom:
[b]I hear ya, Jana. And I agree-- to a point. I have tried to "volunteer" our way into inclusion in a few cases. AND been thoroughly rebuffed.[/b]
WRT: "volunteering"
oddly enough, I spoke with a parent at my child's school recently regarding a bi-monthly school function I am (or was) supposed to be contacted about in order to help plan and make "safe". Apparently this person jumped the gun, and planned it anyway, begging forgiveness after the fact. ie: "Can't you just keep him home on those days??" when I informed them the selections would have to change if they were found to be "unsafe".
I'd still be p***** off if I didn't realize people can't help their character flaws. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img]
Anyway, once again, the choice of establishments picked to service these bi-monthly functions are very [i]cliquey[/i] and lean heavily on those establishments run by families in the district. (actually two different functions for a total of 4 days a month). Is it any wonder, despite the IEP considerations directly involving me, were [i]overlooked[/i].
This person made the mistake of asking me why I hadn't [i]volunteered[/i] to help plan. I had, they just [i]overlooked[/i] me. I volunteered to give an "educational" talk on LTFA (actually was asked by the principal). They never followed up despite my reminders. Maybe they expected me to forget.
I volunteered for the "Local Wellness Policy" committees in our district (and at the cooperative level). I volunteered with the Co-op Coordinator, the district super, and the principal of my child's school last year for this "Local Wellness Policy". I am an RN, a parent of two special needs children, a parent of a children with LTFA, and a member of the district community. Despite what I saw as obvious qualifications, and numerous attempts to volunteer on these projects, [i]I wasn't chosen[/i]. No followup whatsoever.
The list could go on, but I just gotta laugh at the idea that "volunteering" automatically gives you consideration for [i]anything[/i].
Our district is advertising for substitute RN's. I'd be one lonely snowball if I thought for [i]a second[/i] any resume or application I submitted would receive any consideration. I mean, I'm not even a member of the softball league! (again, dripping in sarcasm)
[i]I might apply just for kicks.[/i]
and keep calling and calling and calling. leave oodles of messages.
and then wait for them to send home those notices "Substitue RN's needed" once again. (evil grin).
I might make it my pet project. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/tongue.gif[/img]
Say "volunteer" again. I need the laugh. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img]
Oh, and I have "volunteered" on numerous occassions to come in and scrub down and disinfect my child's classroom (this year his homeroom) each year. (I use FA as an [i]excuse[/i]).
I mean, the condition of the desks just makes my skin crawl. Last year, there were smears on everyone. So gross. Apparently there have been cutbacks on custodial availability. Daily routine cleaning is no longer "the standard".
I wasn't taken up on that offer either. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/tongue.gif[/img]
But thanks for the smile. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img]

Pages

Peanut Free and Nut Free Community

Click on one of the categories below to see all topics and discussions.

Latest Discussions

Latest Post by MoRich Mon, 06/01/2020 - 10:06am
Comments: 6
Latest Post by Sarah McKenzie Fri, 05/22/2020 - 12:57pm
Comments: 6
Latest Post by JRM20 Wed, 05/20/2020 - 9:30am
Comments: 5
Latest Post by justme Mon, 05/18/2020 - 12:36pm
Comments: 45
Latest Post by krisztina Thu, 02/20/2020 - 4:49pm
Comments: 1
Latest Post by chicken Thu, 02/20/2020 - 4:45pm
Comments: 3
Latest Post by lexy Tue, 01/28/2020 - 12:21am
Comments: 6
Latest Post by JRM20 Sun, 01/26/2020 - 11:15am
Comments: 6

Peanut Free Store

More Articles

It Is Easy To Buy Peanut Free Chocolate Online

Ask any parent of a child with a potentially life-...

Peanuts can cause one of the most serious allergic reactions of all food products. Researchers speculate...

Tree nuts and peanuts are distinctly different. An allergy to one does not guarantee an allergy to the other. Peanuts are considered legumes and...

Whether you have a child with a peanut allergy or you are sensitive to packing a nut-free lunch out of concern for other people’s children, it is...

The most frightening thing about a severe allergic reaction to a new food is that it can happen so fast. If parents are not looking for allergic...

Those with severe peanut allergies soon learn to look for the 'peanut-free sign' on any packaged food purchase. This is a notation found on a wide...

Cakes are a central part of many celebrations, from kids' birthdays to weddings. For those with severe ...

For many people with peanut allergies, baked goods present one of the most significant risks. Even if...

A recent study published in the Journal of American College of Nutrition by Mahnaz Rezaeyan Safar and a number of her colleagues has found some...

Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) is an overarching term for a number of progressive lung diseases, including emphysema, chronic...

For individuals suffering from chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD), managing the symptoms and avoiding exacerbations can be a full-time...

Psoriasis is a chronic skin condition that causes itchy patches of inflammation and scale on your skin. The severity of psoriasis symptoms varies...

Kim Kardashian, an immensely famous reality star and the wife of acclaimed rapper Kanye West, has spoken out about her struggle with psoriasis....

Paul Wilson, a long-term marathon runner and asthma sufferer, is urging other people with asthma to support a new campaign aimed at raising...

Psoriasis is a common skin condition that causes a buildup of cells on the skin surface, resulting in dry, red patches on the body and/or face....

Sufferers of Rheumatoid Arthritis (RA) will tell you that the most difficult symptom to deal with is morning stiffness. With nearly 90 percent of...

Knowing which medication is right for you can often be a confusing and overwhelming process. The specific type of asthma medication you require...

Psoriasis is a chronic autoimmune condition that causes painful scaly patches on the skin. Although psoriasis is a very common skin condition,...

Although there are multiple treatments available for rheumatoid arthritis (RA), those suffering from the condition can still find themselves...

Patients undergoing biologic treatment for psoriasis, a relatively common inflammatory skin condition, have seen a reduction in arterial plaque...