First *special request* at School

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 4:50am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Possibly I should post this in OT - but it is allergy related and school related.

My son is in grade one and about to go on the first field trip of the year. He wears an epi-pen due to allergy to insect bites/stings and the trip is to a conservation area.

This week has been emotionally draining in our family, and I didn't even notice the paper about the trip until this afternoon, although it came home yesterday (or maybe the day before????). Anyway, I went to speak to his teacher, and she already has the two volunteer parents for the trip. Only two per class allowed.

I am planning to attach a letter to the form, explaining that I want my son assigned in the teacher's group. I need to know that the adult near him is aware of his allergy and epi, and knows when and how to use it.

The school seems to be very allergy aware, and I don't really expect any problem. It's not like I'm asking for the moon or anything. (Am I?) Anyway, I don't actually expect a problem - but you know - expect the worst and you're never disappointed. [img][/img]

Anyway, not really asking for any help here - just wish me luck. Or, wish him luck. Or, well, wish somebody luck.

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 4:53am
Going Nuts's picture
Joined: 10/04/2001 - 09:00

It's a totally reasonable request, and I'm sure it will be granted.
Good luck to both of you, and I hope he enjoys the trip!

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 4:56am
momma2boys's picture
Joined: 03/14/2003 - 09:00

I agree, no reason why they should deny it. Even though they have two volunteers already I'm sure you could pay for yourself and meet them there.
Hope it works out and next week is a better week for you and your family.

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 5:00am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Actually, I can't meet them there. I don't drive.
I can't quite decide whether I'm nervous about this trip because it's the first time I'm NOT going on a field trip - or if it's because it's a conservation area, and therefore a bit riskier for my son. Honestly, it's cold here. The only bugs out and about are really stupid ones. [img][/img]
Well, time to get headed over to pick him up.

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 6:16am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Anna Marie, I don't think it was that big of a deal (IMHO only) for you to request that your son be placed in the teacher's group, especially if they're going to a conservation area.
And it's not sounding like you would want to do this but you can - you can say that you have to go, not as a volunteer taking a group (because yes, they have enough volunteers) but because your son has an allergy and you are his parent designated supervisor.
Here's why I'm suggesting that - that you try to go. Often times, the teacher's group consists of children that need the teacher's full-time attention (I'm trying to think how to word this, sorry) and she could have her hands full when she needs to be dealing with your son. On the other hand, didn't I almost contradict myself when I said that often times, the teacher's group consists of children that need the teacher's full-time attention? But usually not because of allergies.
Has your son ever gone without you (you do mention this is the first field trip you're not going on) to any "high risk" field trips, like apple orchards, pumpkin patches, etc.?
Honestly, I would say, okay, I understand that you have your volunteers for the class needs, but I'm not volunteering per se, I'm volunteering because my son needs someone to keep an eye on him.
You could also speak with his teacher and see if she feels okay about him being in her group and why and she might even say, well, Mrs. So and So, why don't you come just to be on the safe side? I don't know.
And as far as not seeing the paperwork - man, don't worry about that. My kids' knapsacks are so full of paperwork each night that I can't figure out which end is up. One brought home their pizza day envelope, the other still hasn't. One got their school pictures to-day, the other one didn't. And the forms, and the special forms, and the notices, I've about gone insane.
We also had a difficult week family week, leave it to the evening for the most part, two nights, and things really got waylaid here this week as well.
Also, although I understand the different zippered components of the knapsack, I'm finding stuff everywhere! I like it if the paperwork is in the same place as the lunch bag because at least I have to pull the lunch bag out sometime.
My guy went to the Etobicoke Field Studies Center which I believe is like a conservation area and I did post here (and you did comment on it), that all of the people (instructors/teachers) there were carrying Epi-pens and trained on their useage.
Best wishes! [img][/img]

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 7:21am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Anyone have a lassoo I can borrow? Apparently I am asking for the moon. [img][/img]
I really didn't think this would be a big deal. The school has a peanut ban. A latex ban. Kids carry their epi-pens *on their person*. All I want is to know that my son is with an adult that knows about his allergy, and that he has an epi-pen and they know how to use it.
Here's what has happened.
The letter did come home last night (talked to another parent about it). This morning my son did not go to school. After lunch I spoke to the teacher who said she already had her two volunteers - the first two who asked. OK - that's fine and that's fair.
After school, another mom (one that the teacher told me is going on the trip) asked me if I was going on the trip. I said no - only two can go and the first two to offer were accepted. She said "I haven't even filled in the form yet". [img][/img]
Her daughter comes out of school and says "the teacher said you are coming on the trip with us". She was as confused as me.
OK. So then, I ask the teacher about my son being in her group. She says they will mostly all be together in one group, but for a period of time will split into two groups. One group will be with her and the other with a teacher from the conservation area. She said they are *very aware* about *these things* and employees of the board. So, she won't guarantee that my son will be with her.
Cindy, your post actually has me feeling a bit better. I'm going to call the place they are going - maybe they truly are *very aware about these things*. But if not - I think I'll just keep him home.
I just don't get it. I don't even feel angry. There's no room for anger. I'm confused. I'm frustrated. Why would she lie to me about the first two parents who offered?

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 8:12am
smack's picture
Joined: 11/14/2001 - 09:00

We had very stupid bees buzzing around us while we were waiting for the kids to be dismissed on Thursday.
It is getting a little warmer in London so perhaps that is why.
We went on a field trip Monday and no bees were up that morning(a little nippy).
You should always be able to attend a field trip if your child has a life threatening allergy. No if ands buts about it.
Insist on being able to go.
I have always been allowed to attend and we have way more parent volunteers allowed than just two, holy cow I never even have to pay.
Tell them you'll pay the stupid $4-8.00 trip.
As if you can't sit in a seat that holds two little Grade 1 kids if you had to.
And what's with the other parent volunteers, I would forfeit my seat just for you if I didn't have a child with a life threatening allergy.

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 8:30am
ALLERGYMOM's picture
Joined: 10/09/2003 - 09:00

AM big hugs to you. I dont understand why they only allow 2 parents to go [img][/img] I have never heard of this at my childrens school. I am wishing you LOTS OF LUCK [img][/img]
We go on our first field trip ever next week. I am going with ds. I paid for myself and may even drive my own car.
Anyways Good luck and big hugs to you
Have A great day

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 10:05am
crazydaisy's picture
Joined: 11/14/2003 - 09:00


Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 10:53am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Anna Marie, I agree with smack. You should be allowed to go on the trip, regardless of the number of volunteers because your son has a life threatening allergy. You're not volunteering per se, you're there to keep an eye on your son so that you can react quickly should anything happen to him.
I think the same thing happened when Jesse and his Father went to the conservation area. They weren't really in groups. But Ron still had some children in a group along with Jess.
See, the thing I do when I fill out the permission form is that I write on it automatically that I will be in attendance or Ron will be because of Jesse's PA. I was even able to do this last year when his written school plan was thrown out the window (with the clause about the parent designated supervisor).
I've just recently posted (perhaps in the field trip thread I started) about how it actually bothers me (although I've never spoken up about it) that although I'm volunteering so that my son is "safe", I'm always given a group of children.
To me, you're acting in the capacity of an aide to a child with a life threatening allergy that may need attention while another volunteer or the teacher is trying to keep other children in line or from running wildly through the woods or whatever (there was the place outside of Belleville we went to and we were watching kids didn't fall into water from a boardwalk we were on).
It really sounds as though you don't want to ruffle feathers and I completely understand that, but I would insist that I was going because of my son's allergy.
I would perhaps even consider a really modified written school plan compared to what PA children have. Honestly. Even if it's only a clause about you attending field trips as your son's parent designated supervisor.
I wouldn't keep your guy home - it's setting precedent for the rest of the year and I don't think it's fair. However, I would also understand completely if you choose to do that.
Big hugs. [img][/img]
Best wishes! [img][/img]

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 11:17am
Chicago's picture
Joined: 04/21/2001 - 09:00

Anna Marie,
I liked Cindy's suggestion of calling the place and helping that set your comfort level. Maybe too, you could send them a letter or email (with a copy to the school) explaining your child's condition, school, date, time of this visit, his possible reaction signs and that the Epi is carried -whatever you think it vital). That way the nature center staff is aware (ask for it to be passed on or for the name/ phone number of the groups assigned tour guide) and if the nature center is not comfortable - then the teacher/school will need to regroup and have you attend or reorganize the program so your child can stay with the teacher.
I did this at the end of last school year when dd went on her first "no parents" field trip - an overnight. Since it was an overnight they obviously ate at the facility, but I talked to and emailed their nutritionist and followed up with the facility and the teacher/school with e mails that I had talked to Ms. X and explained the allergies and the following accomidations were being made and if they were not made(such as removing the pb from the breakfast buffet line) to talk to Ms. X. Sorry - I know this example is more involved then what you are dealing with - but maybe working with the facility would help you be sure that everyone is aware and comfortable.
Hope you can work it out.
The field trip volunteer situation seems odd - but maybe that other mom made some off hand comment to the teacher about wanting to help on trips and the teacher "assigned" her to this one as a misunderstanding? I find it sort of funny that some places have parents competing to go on trips. As a room parent finding the chaperones is one of my jobs and I sure there are parents wincing and not picking up when they see my name on the Caller ID around trip time!

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 11:47am
kelly01's picture
Joined: 03/19/2001 - 09:00

Hi AnnaMarie:
I don't know what to tell you to do, but I know what I would do. If I really felt in my gut that my son would be better off in the teachers group than with someone else, I would press the issue with her.
I would probably approach her w/something like "sorry to keep making such an issue w/this, but as this is my sons 1st field trip w/o me, I am feeling worried. I understand that I cannot go on every field trip, but I would really feel so much better if he could be in your group. You seem to have such a good handle on this issue that I would be so reassured to know he was with you, as opposed to someone I don't know." if she continued to waffle I would say something like "what do I need to do to get something in place for further field trips? I don't want to bug you everytime you go somewhere, I realize you have 20 (or whatever) kids to organize so I don't want to add to the burden. Would it help to set up some type of plan for future field trips?"
My gut reaction is that she will realize it will take a lot more work to continue on w/you, and instead she will agree to putting your son in her group.
Sorry to hear you are going through this. My sons school has never denied my request to attend anything...I can't believe a school would do this.

Posted on: Fri, 10/22/2004 - 5:01pm
MommaBear's picture
Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

What is the "Standard of Care" [b]in school[/b] related to the needs of your child?
(Are they adequate?)

Posted on: Sun, 10/24/2004 - 3:21am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

I don't know where to start in answering everybody's posts.
Cindy asked if he had gone on any trips without me - I had thought I had gone on every trip, but actually in jk (same teacher) he had gone on a walking trip to the grocery store that I didn't go on. However, he was assigned to his best friend's mom - I have total faith in her regarding my son's allergy. He had also gone on walking trips last year to a school where they were practicing a performance - he was with his teacher and I was comfortable.
But, I think this is the first bus trip I won't be going on, and since it is in a place I consider *higher risk* for my son, I am a bit nervous. I would be anyway, but now I'm getting worse.
I have absolutely no written plan specific for my son. I have not felt the need to have one. As I posted previously, when I went in expecting to have to fight for the right to have the epi-pen in my son's class they said he should carry it himself. Kind of insisted on that. All staff (teachers, and lunch room) have first aid training and are aware of what students have allergies and epi's. I have spoken to his lunch room supervisor (though he only stays a few times a month) and I'm fine with him being in her care, too.
I know how lucky I am about all this. Truly I do. I've read so much on these boards of people fighting for just a fraction of what was handed to me on a silver platter.
And in two years - trips have never been a problem.
I probably could fight for the right to go as a *parent designate*. However, the principal at this school - well, I don't think very highly of her. And, we have had words in the past. [b]If[/b] I got her co-operation, I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be before this trip. I feel working directly with the teacher is my best bet.
Also, if I fight for the right to go as a *parent designate*, what happens if on another trip I feel the risk is low, and I can't go (for whatever reason)? Then my son will miss future trips. I don't want to open that can of worms if I don't have to.
smack, we've also had some bees around here. And they are stupid and angry. There may be less of them - but at this time of year they tend to be more aggressive.
allergymom, this particular trip includes four classes. So there are four teachers and a total of eight parents. I think the reason is limited seating on the bus. But, also, in the past parents complained about having to pay to go on trips, and this is the first trip volunteers don't have to pay. (Two years ago, with this same teacher, the class went to an apple orchard. I was one of the volunteers, and due to my son's allergy the teacher said I didn't have to pay. I didn't even request it - she just told me to only pay for him, but other parents did have to pay.)
You're right Cindy, I don't want to ruffle feathers. At least, not unless I know I have to. I really like and respect this teacher. If she's right - if the people at the conservation area are aware and prepared regarding allergies, then that means she took the time to find out. If she took the time to find out - why should I now ruffle her feathers? kwim?
chicago, tomorrow I am calling the board to try to get the direct phone number for the place the class is going. I've checked and it's not in the phone book. I don't think it's on their web-site either. If they make me feel *warm & fuzzy* I'll let him go.
As for why the other mom is going although she obviously hadn't asked - I've been thinking about that. First of all, I know the daughter (third year in my son's class) and I'm sure she immediately told the teacher her mom wanted to go. BUT, I doubt the teacher would chose volunteers based on what the children say. This mom almost always does volunteer, and the teacher likes her going because her daughter is very difficult at times. Last year there was a trip that the mom couldn't go on and the teacher wasn't going to allow the child to go. I was an in-class volunteer and knew all the kids. Since the girl reacts well with me (I can usually joke her out of her bad moods) the teacher said OK - she could go in my group, but only after asking me if I was willing to take her in my group. So, looking at that, this is a child who's mom needs to go. It's not a life-or-death allergy - but it is a very serious safety issue.
[i]The good news in this is that my son - who is a major handful - is not considered to hard to handle. [img][/img] Gotta look for that silver lining.[/i]
kelly, if I don't like the answers I get from the conservation area, I will be doing what you suggested. I will refuse to hand in the form and pay the money until I know my son will be safe. I will talk to the teacher. And, I guess I will have to make arrangements in advance for future field trips.
MommaBear - I have always been happy with the "Standard of Care" [b]in school[/b] related to the needs of [b]my[/b] child. I do feel they are adequate for him. I do feel comfortable with them. But, since this is out-of-school and probably further from emergency medical care - I want to make sure they are adequate and not just assume. I don't want my child left in the care of a parent who doesn't know anything about allergies, doesn't know how to use an epi-pen, and may not speak enough english to understand if my son tells him/her what is going on.

Posted on: Sun, 10/24/2004 - 3:35am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Anna Marie, I completely understand you not wanting to ruffle feathers. I really hate it when I've had to and other times, quite frankly, I've buried my head in the sand and prayed rather than ruffle any feathers.
As far as the parent designated supervisor, it doesn't have to be you, i.e., with regard to trips that you consider of lower risk or you're simply not able to go for some reason.
The parent designated supervisor, if you discuss it with the teacher (and/or principal) *can* be the teacher if you feel comfortable with the teacher.
It can also be, as you mentioned, your son's best friend's Mom.
I absolutely loved it when I could deal directly with the teacher rather than having to deal with the principal re Jesse's PA, except in the cases I've run across through the years where the principal was an idiot or the teacher was an idiot, or when things were really bad (like last year) both the principal and teacher were idiots.
For JK and SK, I was told that I could not take my daughter on field trips with Jess. I didn't know at that time that I could have pushed the school. But his teacher was just SO great that I trusted my wee guy off with her on long excursions. The only one I did attend was when I finally had made a friend who could babysit my daughter and it was to the zoo which I considered "high risk".
Since it sounds as though your son's school is dealing with other allergies (whose isn't nowadays?), even now, it would be unusual for you to present them with a written school plan in Canada. It's just not something I've met a principal yet (and remember I've met quite a few [img][/img] ) that they have seen.
But, when they have seen one (except the a**hole last year), they've thought, wow, everything is spelled out really clearly. Not saying that they thought wow and then things went easily. But just that wow, this is spelled out really clearly, now how do we, as school administration, and with regard to other classmates (the request for a "peanut free" classroom) deal with this?
I'll re-raise my son's written school plan, which another member wrote up for me, and I think probably the only clause that would pertain to your son *might* be the field trip and parent designated supervisor clause.
In grades, for example, where Jess was going skating and there is no sense me attending, I have asked another parent if it would be okay if he was in their group, and if I don't know anyone, I've asked the teacher.
As I posted somewhere in this thread, if it's ANY consolation at all, when DH and Jesse went last month to the Etobicoke Field Studies Center, DH ended up in a conversation with one of the leaders of the group and she/he told him that no worry, all of them carried Epi-pens (mostly for insect stings) and were trained in the useage. Remember, you welcomed me back to civilization then! [img][/img]
I hope it works out. [img][/img]
Best wishes! [img][/img]

Posted on: Sun, 10/24/2004 - 5:23am
kelly01's picture
Joined: 03/19/2001 - 09:00

Hi AnnaMarie:
I wanted to add that my son has gone on field trips w/o me, and often times he has been in a group w/another parent. He is in 2nd grade now, but he started going on field trips w/o me in kindergarten.
I will say that he is very diligent, and the teachers are good about making sure the supervisor of his group are aware of his Epi-Pen, etc.
I just wanted to add that info. My above post was based on you feeling strongly about him being in the teachers group. But if (after you call the place) you feel comfortable with the situation (aside from the usual anxiety that comes w/letting go), that it has worked out okay for my son to go w/o me.
Hope all works out well,

Posted on: Sun, 10/24/2004 - 6:42am
MommaBear's picture
Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by AnnaMarie:
MommaBear - I have always been happy with the "Standard of Care" [b]in school[/b] related to the needs of [b]my[/b] child. I do feel they are adequate for him. I do feel comfortable with them. [b]But, since this is out-of-school and probably further from emergency medical care[/b] - I want to make sure they are adequate and not just assume. I don't want my child left in the care of a parent who doesn't know anything about allergies, doesn't know how to use an epi-pen, and may not speak enough english to understand if my son tells him/her what is going on.
The way *I* see it.................
Possibly, [i]The Standard of Care[/i] doesn't (or shouldn't) change, only the interventions necessary to maintain it. I could be wrong.

Posted on: Sun, 10/24/2004 - 10:17pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Anna Marie, I continue to think about this and since it was your first special request of the school. What I'm about to say has nothing to do with field trips but other special requests or requirements that PA parents make of the schools their children attend.
I have read on this board a enough 504 Plans that include the clause that there is to be no eating on the playground if it is not a "peanut free" school because of the residue factor. I have seen people post to me (when I posted last year that I was shocked my children ate their snacks at recess on the playground - which they're doing again this year and it's still something I don't understand because our school has a HUGE wasp problem) that there used to be eating on the playground but once they got there and got their PA child into the school (and obviously met with the principal and requested it) that no eating was done on the playground because of the child's PA.
So, this is your first special request of the school and to me, it's a pretty light one in comparision to what PA parents request/require.
Jesse's first school in Belleville there was no eating on the playground. Why? Because there was a child with an insect sting allergy.
So, in fact, if you look at the TDSB policy re anaphylaxis, you *could* have requested that there be no eating on your son's playground because of is insect sting allergy and it would not have been unreasonable (IMHO).
The day I went in to sit in and watch my son's class last month I was SHOCKED to see the windows open without screens. Why? Because I thought, what if there is a child with an insect sting allergy in the class (there isn't) or even the school (there is)?
And sunflowers growing right outside the window in what the school considers it wild flower section.
So, there are a LOT of things that come to my mind that you could have asked for for your son regarding his allergy and haven't (not saying that you should have, saying that you could have, big difference) and you haven't. You have asked for one simple thing.
I have appreciated what I consider Deb O's way of evaluating school trips and what risk assessment she assigns them for her children (both with a FA).
I know that you're okay about your son going with him being in the teacher's group. Nothing wrong with that. My son has done that a lot (JK and SK).
But here's the thing - if it's a nice day going to the conservation area, windows on the bus may be half down. Because of even a slight risk on the bus, you have the right to request that you attend the field trip with your son.
Last year, it was policy that each parent had to drive themselves or car pool it with other parents. The teacher was trying to find dough head here a ride. Then, ding, I went, wait a minute, one of the reasons I'm going on the trip is because of the possibility of a reaction on the bus (especially if it's a longer ride, although contact is contact for PA). And I was very reluctantly let travel on the bus with the school.
What I'm trying to say Anna Marie, is that I do think that your request is a very simple one and there should be no big deal about it, not when if you look at it, there are quite a few things you *could* (again, not saying should) ask the school to do.
When is the trip?
Me, I'm off to the school, something about the dog ate the homework or some such and can I stay and have my son do his work during recess or can he hand it in a day late or can I just disappear off the face of the earth?
Best wishes! [img][/img]

Posted on: Mon, 10/25/2004 - 1:09am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

As soon as I got back from taking ds to school, I got on the phone.
I spoke to a young man at the conservation area - who btw carries his own epi-pen due to an insect allergy. So do two of his co-workers.
He confirmed that they are board employees - and have first-aid training. They have a large number of schools at the area daily, and he said, there are always a few carrying epi-pens.
During the hike, students will ALWAYS be with either their teacher or someone from the park - NEVER with just a parent. They [i]encourage[/i] teachers to keep students with epi-pens (or other meds) in the teachers group, because they know who has what.
He asked what school my son goes to, and then said "so he's a little guy - grade 1 or 2" and he will mark to have whoever works that group check about what students have epi-pens. [img][/img]
So, basically, I'm feeling OK about this trip. The teacher did give me correct information - he will be with a board employee who has some knowledge about allergies and epi's.
Cindy, I agree there are many things I *could* have asked for. But, all the things that were important to me, were taken care of before my son started at the school.
Due to a few pa children in the school they have a peanut ban (not important in my son's case) and they decided to prepare for other allergy concerns. I wanted the epi-pen in his class - they wanted him to carry it. I agreed that was better, and bought him an epi-belt. I went to the office to discuss garbage in the school yard, but walked through the yard first - there was no garbage in the school yard. There were no garbage cans by the door either - I went in to find out where they place the garbage cans - I was told, not near the doors because they don't want kids walking through a swarm - especially if we ever get a child with an insect allergy. I introduced her to my son. [img][/img] They also prepared for latex allergy [i]before[/i] getting a student with that allergy. Gloves and bandaids provided by the school are not latex - and latex balloons are not allowed in the school. (I'm not sure if there are any other things to do with the latex allergy.)
So, in reality, somebody else fought all the big fights for me. I will now think about whether or not I feel the need to make arrangements for future trips. I might, or I might not. It won't be a quick decision - I want to make sure it's what I feel is necessary before I go to fight for it. (Does that make sense?)
His trip is Friday - so you can all expect me to be a bit of a basket case then, OK. [img][/img]
[b]Thank you all so much![/b]

Posted on: Mon, 10/25/2004 - 1:20am
crazydaisy's picture
Joined: 11/14/2003 - 09:00

It won't be a quick decision - I want to make sure it's what I feel is necessary before I go to fight for it. (Does that make sense?)
Yes it does!
Thank you for sharing
I will be thinking of your son on Fri
The Daisy Thanks You

Posted on: Tue, 10/26/2004 - 2:29pm
Cookie's picture
Joined: 09/25/2001 - 09:00

Your state Department of Education most likely has a stated policy for administration of medication on field trips. You can probably find this right on line. It might state that either the nurse or parent must attend. The school probably can't spare the nurse, so that would mean you - whether teacher likes it or not.

Posted on: Tue, 10/26/2004 - 9:28pm
MommaBear's picture
Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by Cookie:
[b]Your state Department of Education most likely has a stated policy for administration of medication on field trips. You can probably find this right on line. It might state that either the nurse or parent must attend. The school probably can't spare the nurse, so that would mean you - whether teacher likes it or not. [/b]
Do you mean, "State", as in "one of the fifty"? I live in IL. The school my oldest cub attends has put a requirement on my cub's participation in "Field Trips": [i]a parent or parent designee's (other than school staff) attendence[/i].
Don't get me wrong. I think the *best* situation for my *cub* would be for either of his [i]parents[/i] to attend. (He is in 3rd grade.) At least in our own personal, highly individual, and unique situation. However.............
......something about putting a [i]stipulation[/i] on a child's participation related to a "covered disability" [b]that essentially transfers the obligation to accommodate back to those asking for it[/b]..............doesn't sit well with me.
I mean, hypothetically, given the two scenarios:
1.) Child "x" will not be able to attend class field trips unless accompanied by a parent or parent designee. ( and further wording implying: "parent designee" being someone not in employ of the school, and who will carry medication, be responsible for it's correct administration, implementation of any emergency plans, and the general safety and well being of child "x")
2. A parent will be allowed to attend all field trips with child "x".
which would you choose?
My cub's food allergies and asthma are covered under "Other Health Impairment" in his IEP. I mean, would this indicate the school would be required to provide staff as necessary to support the Standard of Care necessary in order to allow a child to attend in the least restrictive environment? [i]Even if it meant the services of an RN[/i]? Honestly? I don't know. Are funds available to support this under "Other Health Impairment"? Honestly? I don't know.
But, I do suspect that even tho I am thrilled to be invited on all field trips and would not allow *my* cub to attend without his parent(s)...........(see, if *I* am responsible for implementing an emergency plan and monitoring my cub, *I* will have the "staff" [b]I designate and require[/b] to assist or collaborate with. [i]I won't be on my own[/i]. [img][/img]
again,......even tho I am thrilled to be invited on all field trips and would not allow *my* cub to attend without his parent(s), I suspect that for whatever reasons, there exist children who may not be able to have their parents or a "parent designee" (implied: other than school staff) attend with them. I mean, at this point, should access to any particular part of education be limited based on a disability? Honestly? I don't know.
ps............I am a licensed RN. It is my understanding that even to not in the employ of the school or district or any related faction thereof.........[i]I would be the only RN attending such trips[/i]. I mean, *I think*, if I attend, [i]the school nurse or other similiarly licensed professional[/i][b] should also attend[/b]. I mean, I'm not privy to any other health care needs or individual health care plans children or adults attending such trips might have. I recall a tragic situation that possibly involving an LPN (not employ of the school and RN) on a field trip several years back. My memory could be wrong.
Although much of my actions as an RN are goverened by Standard Practice, I would hate to think that a person such as myself would be depended on in any formal way to administer to the needs of a person without former knowledge of such needs. You know, a [i]preplan[/i]. Preparedness. Awareness. I think it is very much in the interest of all individuals.
I mean, on such trips, [i]I'm supposed to be watching *my cub*.[/i] You know, delegated to do so. It's also my assumption that others would be watching my cub to........and therefore may not be *watching* him. To me, it's like a [b]Staffing Ratio/assignment based on acuity[/b]. I mean, if there is a need for more *staff* of any particular type, then it would need to be provided.
Sorry for my babble, and hopefully, AnnaMarie will not be offended I stepped in with this concern, but I saw it as related in many ways.............
I hope it made sense in a Big Picture Type of Way. Maybe *I* am just reading waaaaaaaaaaaay too much into it. I could be waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay off.
General Disclaimer: I am not offering advice in any manner or form. Just describing my own personal, highly individual, and unique situation. IMMV.
[This message has been edited by MommaBear (edited October 27, 2004).]

Posted on: Tue, 10/26/2004 - 10:30pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Momma Bear, I can only respond a little bit I think to your post. I have posted on this board what other PA parents do that cannot attend field trips with their children. There are dual-income families (I know you work outside of the home), single parents, etc. where taking time off work to accompany one's child, despite a hidden disability, on a field trip, may not be economically or physically possible.
I've begun to feel, and it's only now in my son's sixth year of school, that really, I shouldn't have to attend field trips because my son has a peanut allergy. He has had one field trip already and his Father did go with him and I'm not saying that I'm not going to be going with him on field trips this year, but I'm saying that I'm really beginning to feel that I shouldn't HAVE to, that it is somehow the school's responsibility to make sure that my son can participate in ALL school activities in relative safety.
I mean, he's there every day without me in the school.
I do use what I consider Deb O's risk assessment of the field trip when deciding if DH or I need to attend a field trip now. And I have, in the past, asked the teacher to be the parent designated supervisor.
The other thing that has bothered me, but I've never said anything about it, is that even though I'm attending as a parent designated supervisor on the field trip because of my son's PA, I am always given a group of children to look after and quite frankly it ticks me off. I'm not volunteering per se, I'm there to keep an eye on my son.
The other thing that is coming into my mind is that he gets older, he's not going to want me going on field trips with him. Right now, at almost 9, he's still cool with Mom going, not clear which age it will become uncool, but what about his socialization at school also?
I don't have anyone else I can ask to be a parent designated supervisor. It's either DH or I. I mean family wise, despite having moved closer to family.
Me, well, I've just written a note in my guy's agenda to-day asking if it's okay to come in Friday morning to check the Hallowe'en party food as per my son's written school plan.
Best wishes! [img][/img]

Posted on: Tue, 10/26/2004 - 11:31pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Quote:Originally posted by MommaBear:
[b] The way *I* see it.................
Possibly, [i]The Standard of Care[/i] doesn't (or shouldn't) change, only the interventions necessary to maintain it. I could be wrong.[/b]
I either missed this post, or read it wrong the first time....
Anyway, it seems the Standard of Care isn't changing. At school his teacher is usually responsible for him - but there are times that he is with a different teacher or staff member - and then they are responsible for him. That is what is happening on the field trip. Either his teacher or a staff member (OK - board employee) will be responsible for him.

Posted on: Tue, 10/26/2004 - 11:33pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Quote:Originally posted by MommaBear:
[b]Sorry for my babble, and hopefully, AnnaMarie will not be offended I stepped in with this concern, but I saw it as related in many ways.............
Only thing I'm upset about is that I've got to run, and I don't have time to read all this right now.
But, I'll be back to read it later. [img][/img]
[i]MB, your comments are always welcomed by me. I don't always understand them, but I always welcome them.[/i] [img][/img]

Posted on: Tue, 10/26/2004 - 11:59pm
MommaBear's picture
Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by Alternative to Mainstream:
[b]Me, well, I've just written a note in my guy's agenda to-day asking if it's okay to come in Friday morning to check the Hallowe'en party food as per my son's written school plan.
holy.............[i]so did I[/i]. [img][/img] As a matter of fact, a representative of the school will be meeting me there to oversee the process.
See, *I*'m [i]not allowed to attend the parties[/i]. Despite being *the* "room mom". Other class parents were surprised. Apparently, other classes allow *room moms* to attend, even class parents. Apparently, the same class last year allowed room moms and parents to attend. It came as a big surprise to some. (The fact I was not allowed to attend).
Aside from meet in a few rooms and attend open house, I have not entered the school area. Everything to date has been *cordial* on our part, even [i]professional[/i] with the exception of some polite/formal disagreement on some points. Even that was cordial and professional.
As a matter of fact, I recieved a communication that *if* I or my husband were to peruse the school environment for any reason, it would only be done with a supervisor assigned to us. [img][/img]
My father told me: [i]"I rather be feared than pitied."[/i] Should I assume in this case we are feared? If so, gotta wonder............[i]why?[/i]
Odd, that I would not be allowed to attend *class parties* as a "room mom", but *I* (or a parent designee not school staff) would be *required* to attend field trips.
BTW, I've also resubmitted our request to observe our cub's participation in classes.
I've also restated my concern to attend the *class parties*.
And yes, I've requested quite a few copies of policies.
General Disclaimer: I am not offering advice in any manner or form.

Posted on: Wed, 10/27/2004 - 12:12am
California Mom's picture
Joined: 07/14/2000 - 09:00

MommaBear, I think that is blatant discrimination of your son that either a parent or [i]non-staff[/i] must attend all field trips. I don't like it at all.
My dd's 504 plan stipulates that a parent is [i]allowed[/i] to attend.
Also, I feel that there is descrimination going on that you are not allowed to attend parties, when other classes allow it and this same teacher allowed it last year.
This business about you needing to basically be "chaperoned" on campus is bizarre.
It sounds like this school is a lot more concerned about covering their own you-know-whats rather than providing a supportive and safe environment for your son.

Posted on: Wed, 10/27/2004 - 1:37am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Momma Bear, I agree with California Mom. Since I've already posted that I have sat in on my son's class and eaten at his peanut free BENCH with simply the verbal permission of his teacher, what is the big deal? I wasn't in the class to observe anything re PA (that was what I did at the BENCH later), I was there to observe other things regarding my son and the teacher thought it was a great idea.
Also, if you're "class Mom" (or "room Mom"), wouldn't it be expected that you would be in the class during parties to help out? Or what does being "class Mom" mean?
I don't know if it's in this thread or not, but I've now received notices from both of my children's classes that there are parent volunteers to call and they co-ordinate things like parties.
I received a message from the one for my son's class saying what he should bring to the party on Friday with a reminder that it was a peanut/nut free class and that the products had to be "safe".
However, as I outlined to his teacher in the note last night, it is the first party of the year, and I do expect, because it has happened in the past, for there to be some mistakes (not malicious or anything, just mistakes) and that's why I want to see what food is in that classroom. At this moment in time, I don't think the teacher will have a problem with this request, but I'll let everyone know.
I know that my son is old enough to choose what to eat carefully - for example, he never eats cupcakes from anyone, at school or anywhere else just because.
And certainly if I see anything on Friday that is not okay, I'm not going to make a big fuss about it, I'm simply going to ask for it to be removed from the peanut/nut free classroom and even volunteer to package it up for the other 33 students so they can take it home when they leave school on Friday.
Last year, the reason I was so upset (and I'll have to look at the thread again) was that Jesse's teacher was pi**ed off at me that I didn't want the products in the classroom. Her tone and facial expression told me that she would rather have me remove my son from school that day than take the offending products out of the classroom and that's why I ended up dealing with the substitute principal.
I also don't understand why you have to be chaperoned around the school. I walked into the school early Monday morning to speak with Jesse's teacher before class started about a project he was working on. I then walked to the office and left the Dey video, Epi-pen trainer and booklet for the principal. I was certainly not followed through the school or chaperoned. To me, that's just utter b/s (sorry).
To me, you would think that a school would welcome a concerned parent. How many parents even ask to go to observe their children's class (I don't mean PA parents, I mean all parents in general)?
I do hope that you are documenting all of this run around because I honestly don't think you should have had to put your request in writing and even if that is school policy, I don't understand why you haven't had a response yet.
Best wishes! [img][/img]

Posted on: Wed, 10/27/2004 - 6:30am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Anna Marie, sorry off topic. I did receive permission to check Jesse's Hallowe'en party food to-day from his teacher. She wrote in his agenda that I was welcome to come in to check the food after lunch because they expected all of the food to be brought in by lunch time for the party.
Best wishes! [img][/img]

Posted on: Thu, 10/28/2004 - 12:55am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Class mom or room mom aside, any parent should be welcome to the classroom. (Not everyone is able to be room mom, but it doesn't mean they shouldn't be allowed to see the class - in the class.)
I can understand a teacher wanting it to be pre-arranged. Suddenly having a mom in the class can be disruptive, and the teacher should have some advance knowledge that this is going to happen.

Posted on: Thu, 10/28/2004 - 6:43am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

My saga continues....
Found out there are now three mom's going on the trip. And I'm [b]still[/b] not one of them.

Posted on: Thu, 10/28/2004 - 7:26am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Anna Marie, I agree that the visit should be pre-arranged, not just having every Mom and Dad (or guardian for political correctness) wander into the classroom to observe it whenever they feel like it.
I was met with such openness from Jesse's teacher when I made the request one night after having a discussion with her about something to do with Jess, obviously in class. I basically asked her permission and she gave it to me right away. No big deal.
That's why I can't understand why Momma Bear is getting such a run around about basically the same request I have already had fulfilled.
Same as for the party tomorrow. I went in tonight to drop off Jesse's donation to the party for tomorrow (mind boggled in the morning [img][/img] ) and I told her that I'd be in around 12:30 maybe - that Jesse was extremely aware of his allergy and what he can't eat, for example he probably wouldn't eat cupcakes, etc.
Now, she had already given me permission immediately when I asked this also. To-day she basically said I didn't have to come if I didn't want to because she's extremely diligent about PA in her classroom and I do believe her.
I told her that the only reason I would come in was just to do a quick glance to see what was coming in (to me it's just checking to see if people are "getting it" for the first party of the year).
Sorry. That was all about something else.
As far as your situation and the field trip. I'm sorry. I would be bloody angry. You were clearly told that only 2 parent volunteers were wanted/needed/whatever and that because that number had been met you could not go. So why the third Mom now?
Is it a clique situation or something (I saw that in Jesse's school last year)?
However, I would be very angry if I were you - is the field trip tomorrow or next Friday? If it's next Friday, after finding out that there is a third party, I would pull the "parent designated supervisor" card and to he** with them. This ticks me off. You have a legitimate reason for wanting/needing to go. It's not so that you can la dee dah have a good time on a field trip.
I was going to say that now that we're no longer long distance, if you're concerned when your guy is away, you could always call me next week and I'll try to calm you down in my very calming voice (I've heard that about my voice recently [img][/img] ) but then again, you want the phone open just in case.
No, Anna Marie, I'm sorry, I'd be ticked right off. If a third person was all of a sudden going to be allowed to go, it should have been YOU. Period.
Best wishes! [img][/img]

Posted on: Thu, 10/28/2004 - 12:54pm
momma2boys's picture
Joined: 03/14/2003 - 09:00

AnnaMarie and MommaBear, you are both getting the runaround big time. When schools do stuff like this, I always wonder if they are afraid of what we will see. I would be very upset if I were either of you. I def. wouldnt put up with it.

Posted on: Thu, 10/28/2004 - 11:55pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

The trip is today.
The mom with the difficult daughter couldn't get a baby sitter, so she told the teacher she couldn't go. Teacher got another parent. (Let's assume this other parent also put in request before me.) So, OK, fine.
The the mom did get a sitter. So, she told the teacher she could go. So, the teacher said fine, but didn't cancel the second mom she had gotten.
But, if she could take three, why wouldn't she allow me when I had a valid reason?
What I want to find out after school today is; is this other mom driving herself? is she paying herself?
If she is driving herself, then I have to say - OK, I couldn't and if there was no room on the bus, fine.
But, the thing is - I really think this teacher is good. I like her as a teacher, and as a person.
When we have parent/teacher interviews, I think I will let her know that come spring (and insect season) I insist on going on any outdoor trips with my son. It's cold here today, so little risk to him, but when the warm weather returns - I go or he doesn't.

Posted on: Fri, 10/29/2004 - 1:43am
California Mom's picture
Joined: 07/14/2000 - 09:00

AnnaMarie, I think you have an incredibly valid issue to bring up with the teacher ASAP.
If I were you (and of course I am not so please don't think I am telling you what to do - KWIM?) I would make a time to talk with the teacher and let her know that you are confused about the way this field trip thing was handled. I would go into the details of what happened this time and see if she has an explanation.
Good luck!

Posted on: Fri, 10/29/2004 - 9:50am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Miriam, I love the way you wrote that. It made me laugh. [img][/img]
OK - so here's what I found out after school today.
First mom (with difficult daughter) cancelled because she didn't have a sitter. Another mom took her place. One of the two mom's cancelled the day before the trip, and [b]then[/b] difficult daughter's mom said she did have a sitter after all.
So, in the end ---- two mom's went. Both on the bus, and paid by the school.
My son was in his teacher's group at the conservation area. He had a great time. [img][/img]
I am still going to talk to the teacher about trips in the spring though.
[i]Additionaly lesson for teacher: Next time - pick a mom you can depend on.[/i] [img][/img]

Posted on: Fri, 10/29/2004 - 12:27pm
kelly01's picture
Joined: 03/19/2001 - 09:00

Hi AnnaMarie:
Quick note to say, sorry that you are having to go through this...but delighted to see your son went on the trip, everything worked out okay and that he had a great time!

Posted on: Fri, 10/29/2004 - 1:25pm
momma2boys's picture
Joined: 03/14/2003 - 09:00

AnnaMarie, Glad he is ok, and had fun!

Posted on: Fri, 10/29/2004 - 1:31pm
California Mom's picture
Joined: 07/14/2000 - 09:00

[img][/img] I swear I wasn't even trying to be funny!
So glad that all went well!
[img][/img] Miriam

Posted on: Fri, 10/29/2004 - 11:35pm
MommaBear's picture
Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by AnnaMarie:
So, in the end ---- two mom's went. Both on the bus, and paid by the school.
My son was in his teacher's group at the conservation area. He had a great time. [img][/img]
I am still going to talk to the teacher about trips in the spring though.
completely understand. I mean, if you could have had this handed to you straight from the get go.................
yup. there's a lot of talk about things being more difficult than they have to be. This is a perfect example, yes?
Personally? One of the more difficult aspects of my job is not to be able to tell people everything they want to know about someone they love or deeply care for. Especially when I know it can offer solace. (HIPPA laws prevent me in many instances) [i]It even causes me suffering[/i]?
I'd hate to think people would leave others dangling purposely for no reason.
edited for numerous typos. [img][/img]
[This message has been edited by MommaBear (edited October 30, 2004).]

Posted on: Sat, 10/30/2004 - 12:36am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Yes - that's it EXACTLY, MB.
If she had just said "sure, he'll be in my group". There would have been no issue. I would have worried while he's on the trip (that's just normal, isn't it?) but I wouldn't have been fretting for a whole week.

Posted on: Sat, 10/30/2004 - 10:53am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Anna Marie, I'm glad that things went well and that your guy had a good time. [img][/img] I don't think that there is anything wrong with you speaking with the teacher and asking her that you be included in field trips in more dangerous months/seasons.
The worrying all day that you experienced, yes, certainly *normal* (if you can gauge things by me) but no, the other worry you had all week was unnecessary and then with the addition of the third Mom (and then minus the third Mom and blah blah blah) it's simply confusing.
I have to tell you, after what happened to me this summer with that multiple wasp sting incident, I would be scared witless to have a child with this type of allergy. It was something that was so out of control, so unexpected, so immediate.
PA I do find more controllable, if that makes sense.
And every time I'm at the kids' school (twice a day every day), I also think of you and your guy because we do have what I think is a severe wasp problem at the school because the children are eating their snacks at recess on the playground.
I understood from the principal at the beginning of the school year that there was also a child with an insect sting allergy, and since I know one of the reasons Jesse's Grade One school didn't allow eating on the playground was because of an insect sting allergy, I'm not clear why the eating is allowed, especially when PA parents often require/request that no eating be done on the playground.
However, I digress. Must be pretty obvious I haven't been on the computer for 24 hours or so [img][/img]
I am glad it went well. [img][/img]
Best wishes! [img][/img]

Posted on: Sat, 10/30/2004 - 11:41am
MommaBear's picture
Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by AnnaMarie:
[b]Yes - that's it EXACTLY, MB.
If she had just said "sure, he'll be in my group". There would have been no issue. [/b]
[b]"sure, he'll be in my group"[/b]
what is that? about 2.5 seconds and 300 ml of breath? [i]Unbelievable.[/i]
I mean, was there a [i]reason[/i] for stating it from the [i]get go[/i]? If so, then was reasons for *that* explained? If not, then what to think............
no. [i]very believable[/i]. As a matter of fact, it is part of the reasons why I'm becomming such a tight-@$$ (and yes, there [i]are[/i] physiological limits, mine are just extraordinary......I can make neurotic, compulsive, and obsessive look like a walk in the park) about enumerating every breath in my cubs plan lately. I mean, since it seems to be such a highly regulated commodity. [img][/img] Breath, I mean. [img][/img] But ya know, it would be sad to have to do that. It's not how we want it to be. [i]My husband and I sooooooooooooooooo easy to work with when given the opportunity.[/i]
I mean, I wanna shout: "Show me sign that you care, tell me something, anything, that let's me know you understand."
Not saying it hasn't happened before, just not nearly often enough (maybe it's just me), or something happens that disintegrates trust. [i]And trust is hard to rebuild.[/i]
I'm finding that some very important things are being misconstrued in [i]our[/i] plan, or there is difficulty in accurately extrapolating on the premise (sorta like your situation and what would constitute a [i]prudent[/i] thing to do on such trips), while other items, inconsistent with [i]understanding[/i] are being proposed.

Posted on: Mon, 11/01/2004 - 1:20pm
alwaysconfused's picture
Joined: 10/30/2004 - 09:00

I did not even think about this when my son in Kindergarten went on his first trip. I am learning sooo much from everyone here. I do not think you were asking for anything special. After a day of rage with administrators today, I feel your pain. I have only asked for about 5 minutes worth of consideration and they can't even do that. Now I want it all andI am going in for the fight of my child's life (literally). I think the teacher could and should make sure your child is with her so that you are more comfortable with the situation. How do you know how much you can trust these people. I trusted my so called best school in the state district and they were not so nice to my son. I found out that on the first day of school he sat next to a girl at lunch who had a peanut butter sandwich. I did have a meeting with principal and nurse over the summer. His allergy was well made aware of and I was told that everyone he comes in contact would be made aware of his situation. Well, well where was the lunch aide here. Now I am going 504 as I just found out about it. My idea is to not trust anyone. You can tell I am angry today. Hope it works out for you. Good Luck

Posted on: Mon, 11/01/2004 - 11:38pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Good Luck to you too. [img][/img]
Have you started a thread about what happened? If you just need to rant do it anywhere [img][/img] but if you need help, start a new thread. Lots of pioneers here will help you. [img][/img]

Posted on: Tue, 11/02/2004 - 4:23am
mommyofmatt's picture
Joined: 03/12/2004 - 09:00

Hey AnnaMarie,
Glad all went well and your little guy had fun! Unbelievable after all that, the teacher kept him in her group. I don't know why she couldn't agree to that from the beginning. [img][/img] [img][/img]
Meg, mom to:
Matt 2 yrs. PA,MA,EA
Sean 2 yrs. NKA

Posted on: Wed, 11/03/2004 - 7:47am
alwaysconfused's picture
Joined: 10/30/2004 - 09:00

I had a meeting today with school psycologist who is 504 advocate. I am going to be able to attend any and all trips and it will be on the 504. I will have to provide my own transportation, etc. but I don't care. They only allow two parents and in kindergarten I understand that every parent wants to go the trips and if I was mandated as always being the one parent then most the parents wouldn't get a chance so I said well I will go on my own but need to be allowed to be with him as extra class mother. Psych said ok it will be included in 504. I asked because of your post. I would not have thought of it. I am sorry if I am posting everywhere but I don't really know what I am doing and as always, I am confused. LOL. Thanks so much, you blessed me.

Posted on: Wed, 11/03/2004 - 9:34am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Anna Marie, you just have to love this quote (from Momma Bear):-
what is that? about 2.5 seconds and 300 ml of breath? Unbelievable.
And how much angst did it cause you to have her NOT utter those words from the very beginning? ARGHH! [img][/img]
Best wishes! [img][/img]

Posted on: Wed, 11/03/2004 - 12:49pm
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Adele, I'm so glad that this thread was able to help someone. [img][/img]
And, personally, I don't care where anyone posts anything. I only mentioned it because if you want some help with a particular problem, people will see it faster if you start a new thread. I also sometimes suggest a person start a thread in a particular forum - again, not because I care what forum it's in, just that if they need/want help with a particular problem it sometimes comes faster that way.
And again, thank you - it made my evening. [img][/img]
And yes, Cindy, MB's quote - as usual - is right on the money. [img][/img]

Posted on: Fri, 12/03/2004 - 4:42am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Today I had the parent-teacher interview. After reading a reminder post from Deb O. I decided this was a good time to talk to the teacher about future trips.
Here's what I found out. Prior to the trip to the conservation area, my son's teacher took the time to call them and discuss the fact that she had a young student with an insect allergy. She wanted to know if there were any areas he should avoid, or any extra precautions needed. He would always be with a *group leader*. (In this case a *group leader* was a staff member and carried a walkie-talkie for emergencies.) She did that [b]on her own[/b].
She completely agrees that another parent should not be responsible for my son on trips. Both for his safety, as well as the fact that it is unfair to put that responsibility on a parent that doesn't know anything about allergies.
I let her know (in a friendly way) that I had been very worried/upset, and that I need to know what's happening on field trips. I don't want to ever feel I can't let him go - and although I know some kids with allergies have parent disignates go on every trip (written in school plans), I don't feel that's necessary for my son - I just need to know he's with someone who's *aware*.
I also explained that although usually I'm totally OK about my son's allergy, once in a while even little things just set me off. Some days I have a hard time just dropping him at school, because I'm so afraid of recess.
I think, she never realized that I sometimes feel like I'm just hanging on the end of a rope. I've never made a big deal about his allergy - I've never needed to. Now she knows. Hopefully in future she'll think to tell me the things she does. [img][/img]

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