Do you have detailed instructions for managing FA if you and your spouse die?

Posted on: Tue, 01/23/2007 - 4:25am
carpediem's picture
Joined: 01/08/2007 - 09:00

I have been writing some things down for our chosen guardians but need more detail, I realize now, on how to manage my child's food allergies to PN and TN if my husband and I were to both die. Has anyone else done this? If so, what did you include?

Posted on: Tue, 01/23/2007 - 4:56am
chanda4's picture
Joined: 12/14/2006 - 09:00

I've thought about this MANY times....and all I can do, is just push it away. I KNOW I need to be prepared, I honestly can NOT think of anyone that could take this on, that would protect my kids lives like their own, I do, but no one else could. This plays in my head alot, do I leave them with Grandma and Grandpa, who DON'T GET MIL and FIL would NOT educate themselves, they already think I over act and am a freak! I almost think total strangers would be best....I know I NEED to face this and prepare, but when nothing looks good, it's better for me to just pretend it won't happen(which I know is REALLY bad, i know that). I have written/typed up lots of information and have it posted around the house. Lists of allergies on the pantry door for each kid, lists of emergency plans(meds to give, Epipen instructions, 911 instructions) then of sourse my oldest, I know she's only 8, but I know she would be very protective of her siblings.
Once I do buckle down and do this type of thing, I would probably leave my allergists name and number and demand that whomever I decide where the kids will go, they will HAVE to undergo an allergy boot-camp of sorts and they wouldn't get the kids until then. This is hard, I agree!
Chanda(mother of 4)
Sidney-8 (beef and chocolate, plus MANY seasonal)
Jake-6 (peanut, all tree nuts, eggs, plus seasonal and animal)
Carson-3 1/2 (milk, soy, egg, beef and pork, plus animal)
Savannah-1 (milk and egg)

Posted on: Tue, 01/23/2007 - 6:46am
Carefulmom's picture
Joined: 01/03/2002 - 09:00

Yes, I`ve done it. I have a copy sitting on my desk, also with my estate attorney who did my trust. I revise it every year or two as the allergies change or the meds change (asthma) and put the revision date on it. You don`t want people wasting time figuring out what they can feed your child if something happens to you. With the instructions are an epipen trainer and the FAAN video "It Only Takes One Bite".

Posted on: Tue, 01/23/2007 - 7:11am
anonymous's picture
Joined: 05/28/2009 - 16:42

I keep info on the kids' doctors and medical conditions, their school and teachers, prescriptions, etc. on my computer. I send it to my SIL every time there is a change. There are two reasons I send it to her. First is she and my brother have custody if anything should happen to both DH and I. Second, DH is not at all hands-on for that end of everything, and if I died or suddenly ended up in the hospital, he might be too upset and/or busy to find this info on his own, so SIL has instructions to get DH this info if anything happens to me. DH also has instructions to get this info from her.
We also have a will and a trust.

Posted on: Tue, 01/23/2007 - 8:27am
TwokidsNJ's picture
Joined: 05/28/2005 - 09:00

This is a really good idea! My BIL/SIL could handle it, but it is a good idea to have it outlined nicely for them. They have a dd with cashew allergy but it is not as serious so they would need to understand how vigilant we are with our 2 boys.

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