Depressed

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 12:55am
mandymom's picture
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Joined: 09/24/2005 - 09:00

Well, DS is already allergic to peanuts, eggs, and peas. I just got a call from the allergists office with partial results from his most recent RAST test. He is also allergic to cashew, pistachio, sesame, almond, hazelnut, and cod now. The good news is he tested negative to mango, avacado, tuna, shrimp, and white bean. I kinda knew he would be allergic to the treenuts and fish but I guess I was really hoping that he wouldn't be. We still have more results that should be ready soon. It's kinda like being hit with the PA all over again. DS seems to be following the same road as my Dad except my Dad is allergic to all beans, also. I just feel like crying again like when he was diagnosed with PA. I feel guilty because I should've watched what I ate when I was pregnant. I feel like I could have prevented it. I know it's stupid to think about that now, but I can't help it. Ugh! Well, enough whining for the moment. I'm gonna go look around the boards to read what I can about sesame allergy. Thanks for letting me vent!

Mandy

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 1:05am
stephi13339's picture
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Joined: 03/09/2006 - 09:00

please don't be hard on yourself, this is NOT your fault. (or anyone ele's for that matter) Obviously, you love your son. You're just "grieving" from the news. It's not even conclusive yet that eating peanuts when you're pregnant "causes" FA. If it was conclusive, and you had known that back then, you probably woldn't have. But you didn't, so let yourself off the hook. You're being the best mother you can be. Go ahead and cry a little, eat some chocolate (peanut free [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img]) then hug your son. Life is good, and you have a wonderful son! He'll get through this just fine!(and so will you [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img])

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 1:07am
notnutty's picture
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Joined: 03/15/2004 - 09:00

Mandy: Sorry to hear the latest results. It has to be disheartening when the list keeps growing. Try not to beat yourself up over "should have" done this or "should not have" done that. In reality we do not KNOW what causes allergies. There are many theories, but none of us can with certainty know what causes them. Sure if you could do it over knowing what you know now, you may have avoided certain foods. Unfortunately, we don't get a "do over" button in life. I know there would be MANY things I would be hitting that button for. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img].
Allow yourself time to grieve over these last results, then pull yourself up and begin the research process. Good luck to you!
Donna

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 1:37am
jtolpin's picture
Offline
Joined: 05/28/2003 - 09:00

Y'know.. Today, Im in a funk.
But I hear ya... If ya need help with what eat, just email me. Ill talk to ya [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
We avoid the majority of foods.
Jason
------------------
[b]* Obsessed * [/b]

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 5:34am
Claire's picture
Offline
Joined: 04/19/2000 - 09:00

mandymom, My son is 19 and always been allergic. Just to let you know the pea allergy goes with the PA. Also I ONLY ate Peanut butter products when pregnant. I could not eat or look at any other food without getting sick. Do I blame myself on the allergy? NO! My dd is not allergic to coffee ice cream and that is the only food I wanted when pregnant for her.
My brother is allergic to shellfish and I am sure my mother didn't live on that when pregant.
I have never been depressed a day in my life.
Just figure that our kids could have been given some horrible disease that has them in constant pain and suffering all the time.
At least we can just read lables and homebake food for our kids.
I have a friend dealing with a child with cancer. I can handle a food allergy any day.
Don't be depressed Be Thankful that it isn't any worse.
We are so lucky just to be able to watch our children run and play like other children.
It will be ok. best of luck to you. Claire

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 5:34am
fos4snt's picture
Offline
Joined: 09/20/2005 - 09:00

Well, I definitely know how you feel. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/eek.gif[/img] Having just learned last week that our list more than quadrupled from the last allergy testing which was JUST PA. *deep sigh*
Sometimes you just want to ask.. "okay, stop the list now... what CAN he eat?!?! Just gimme a list of food he CAN eat!!!"
If it's any consolation, it's been exactly one week since we got our additional food and environmental lists, but we're already calming down and adjusting. Did our first shopping trip and are just doing the best we can. (We get to add soy, sesame and tree nuts to the list of allergens...)
It does get better.
~phos
[This message has been edited by fos4snt (edited March 28, 2006).]

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 8:18am
notnutty's picture
Offline
Joined: 03/15/2004 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by jtolpin:
[b]Y'know.. Today, Im in a funk.
But I hear ya... If ya need help with what eat, just email me. Ill talk to ya [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
We avoid the majority of foods.
Jason
[/b]
Jason....I remember once I was in a funk...you gave me some great advice...enjoy a bubble bath with a glass of wine. It worked for me, perhaps it will work for you. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
Donna

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 9:58am
cathlina's picture
Offline
Joined: 06/29/2001 - 09:00

We live in a junk food culture. Look at all the stuff peanuts are in. Food snacks are emphasized everywhere we go.
I am actually happy that I can't eat all the stuff anymore because of my food allergies.
I lost 70 lbs. when I took manufactured foods out of my diet. My cholestral and triglycerides count went way down. I am a lot healthier.
My parents did not have all this junk food in the 30's and 40's while they were growing up.
Either did cavemen.
The trend is back to organic foods..and getting rid of additives and junk.
I can only imagine what is like to supervise a child with food allergies and all the anxiety that goes with it.
But, try not to get down over it. Just take one day at a time....

Posted on: Thu, 03/30/2006 - 3:07am
mandymom's picture
Offline
Joined: 09/24/2005 - 09:00

Thanks for the words of wisdom. He is a happy and healthy little man so I should be thankful for that! I'm just afraid of the future and what he may have to deal with. I'm hoping that by the time he starts school (he's 18 months), that things will change. People will understand this. If not, I'm moving to Canada. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] Seems like things are taken seriously there. And as I read on here I'm wondering how far I have to take this. I never thought of calling manufacturers about soap, or yogurt, or laundry detergent. Is that something I'm doing wrong? It's all so confusing and overwhelming right now. I just want to do the right thing. Guess I got more reading to do!
Thanks,
Mandy

Posted on: Thu, 03/30/2006 - 4:02am
jtolpin's picture
Offline
Joined: 05/28/2003 - 09:00

Donna, TYVM.
I try my best, I believe, to help out as many people as I can -- Im like a walking 'spokesman' spewing my story (our story) to anyone that listens and asks for help.
No, my story isn't for everyone. But (and Im seriously NOT talking here - just 'out there) when someone asks for help, and you give your story, and its ignored completely, and they go about their merry way and do what they're doing, I just sit here go think 'Why DID you ask for help? Why are you wasting my time? There are others that would benefit more than you...'
The 'You can lead a horse to water...' theory holds true for some.
I could go on... and I do [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
No bubble baths for me. You know where my happiness at the end of night comes from...
Jason
---------------
As for doign whats 'wrong' -- You do what NEEDS to be done, as a parent. If the child is 'ok' with certain things, why 'rock the boat'... Now if your child is constantly reacting, and you're BF'ing, and you want to start eating lobster, well... thats another story. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
But if you've hit 'baseline', get comfy with the products you use, and don't switch.
Example: We buy this ONE specific strawberry jelly for Caitlin. Its from Whole Foods (HERO, I think). Im sure we could use something cheaper (Smuckers?) but you know what.. Cant switch mid-stream [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
------------------
[b]* Obsessed * [/b]

Posted on: Thu, 03/30/2006 - 4:59am
notnutty's picture
Offline
Joined: 03/15/2004 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by jtolpin:
[b]...No, my story isn't for everyone. But (and Im seriously NOT talking here - just 'out there) when someone asks for help, and you give your story, and its ignored completely, and they go about their merry way and do what they're doing, I just sit here go think 'Why DID you ask for help? Why are you wasting my time? There are others that would benefit more than you...'
The 'You can lead a horse to water...' theory holds true for some.....
[/b]
I am not sure I am following where this comes from??? Are you talking about people in the GENERAL public...or people on THIS board??
I often appreciate your comments because usually they are very straight to the point and honest...
I think I am missing something from the discussion?? Or I am not very sharp today, because suddenly I am feeling lost!
Donna

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 1:05am
stephi13339's picture
Offline
Joined: 03/09/2006 - 09:00

please don't be hard on yourself, this is NOT your fault. (or anyone ele's for that matter) Obviously, you love your son. You're just "grieving" from the news. It's not even conclusive yet that eating peanuts when you're pregnant "causes" FA. If it was conclusive, and you had known that back then, you probably woldn't have. But you didn't, so let yourself off the hook. You're being the best mother you can be. Go ahead and cry a little, eat some chocolate (peanut free [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img]) then hug your son. Life is good, and you have a wonderful son! He'll get through this just fine!(and so will you [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img])

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 1:07am
notnutty's picture
Offline
Joined: 03/15/2004 - 09:00

Mandy: Sorry to hear the latest results. It has to be disheartening when the list keeps growing. Try not to beat yourself up over "should have" done this or "should not have" done that. In reality we do not KNOW what causes allergies. There are many theories, but none of us can with certainty know what causes them. Sure if you could do it over knowing what you know now, you may have avoided certain foods. Unfortunately, we don't get a "do over" button in life. I know there would be MANY things I would be hitting that button for. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img].
Allow yourself time to grieve over these last results, then pull yourself up and begin the research process. Good luck to you!
Donna

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 1:37am
jtolpin's picture
Offline
Joined: 05/28/2003 - 09:00

Y'know.. Today, Im in a funk.
But I hear ya... If ya need help with what eat, just email me. Ill talk to ya [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
We avoid the majority of foods.
Jason
------------------
[b]* Obsessed * [/b]

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 5:34am
Claire's picture
Offline
Joined: 04/19/2000 - 09:00

mandymom, My son is 19 and always been allergic. Just to let you know the pea allergy goes with the PA. Also I ONLY ate Peanut butter products when pregnant. I could not eat or look at any other food without getting sick. Do I blame myself on the allergy? NO! My dd is not allergic to coffee ice cream and that is the only food I wanted when pregnant for her.
My brother is allergic to shellfish and I am sure my mother didn't live on that when pregant.
I have never been depressed a day in my life.
Just figure that our kids could have been given some horrible disease that has them in constant pain and suffering all the time.
At least we can just read lables and homebake food for our kids.
I have a friend dealing with a child with cancer. I can handle a food allergy any day.
Don't be depressed Be Thankful that it isn't any worse.
We are so lucky just to be able to watch our children run and play like other children.
It will be ok. best of luck to you. Claire

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 5:34am
fos4snt's picture
Offline
Joined: 09/20/2005 - 09:00

Well, I definitely know how you feel. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/eek.gif[/img] Having just learned last week that our list more than quadrupled from the last allergy testing which was JUST PA. *deep sigh*
Sometimes you just want to ask.. "okay, stop the list now... what CAN he eat?!?! Just gimme a list of food he CAN eat!!!"
If it's any consolation, it's been exactly one week since we got our additional food and environmental lists, but we're already calming down and adjusting. Did our first shopping trip and are just doing the best we can. (We get to add soy, sesame and tree nuts to the list of allergens...)
It does get better.
~phos
[This message has been edited by fos4snt (edited March 28, 2006).]

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 8:18am
notnutty's picture
Offline
Joined: 03/15/2004 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by jtolpin:
[b]Y'know.. Today, Im in a funk.
But I hear ya... If ya need help with what eat, just email me. Ill talk to ya [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
We avoid the majority of foods.
Jason
[/b]
Jason....I remember once I was in a funk...you gave me some great advice...enjoy a bubble bath with a glass of wine. It worked for me, perhaps it will work for you. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
Donna

Posted on: Tue, 03/28/2006 - 9:58am
cathlina's picture
Offline
Joined: 06/29/2001 - 09:00

We live in a junk food culture. Look at all the stuff peanuts are in. Food snacks are emphasized everywhere we go.
I am actually happy that I can't eat all the stuff anymore because of my food allergies.
I lost 70 lbs. when I took manufactured foods out of my diet. My cholestral and triglycerides count went way down. I am a lot healthier.
My parents did not have all this junk food in the 30's and 40's while they were growing up.
Either did cavemen.
The trend is back to organic foods..and getting rid of additives and junk.
I can only imagine what is like to supervise a child with food allergies and all the anxiety that goes with it.
But, try not to get down over it. Just take one day at a time....

Posted on: Thu, 03/30/2006 - 3:07am
mandymom's picture
Offline
Joined: 09/24/2005 - 09:00

Thanks for the words of wisdom. He is a happy and healthy little man so I should be thankful for that! I'm just afraid of the future and what he may have to deal with. I'm hoping that by the time he starts school (he's 18 months), that things will change. People will understand this. If not, I'm moving to Canada. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] Seems like things are taken seriously there. And as I read on here I'm wondering how far I have to take this. I never thought of calling manufacturers about soap, or yogurt, or laundry detergent. Is that something I'm doing wrong? It's all so confusing and overwhelming right now. I just want to do the right thing. Guess I got more reading to do!
Thanks,
Mandy

Posted on: Thu, 03/30/2006 - 4:02am
jtolpin's picture
Offline
Joined: 05/28/2003 - 09:00

Donna, TYVM.
I try my best, I believe, to help out as many people as I can -- Im like a walking 'spokesman' spewing my story (our story) to anyone that listens and asks for help.
No, my story isn't for everyone. But (and Im seriously NOT talking here - just 'out there) when someone asks for help, and you give your story, and its ignored completely, and they go about their merry way and do what they're doing, I just sit here go think 'Why DID you ask for help? Why are you wasting my time? There are others that would benefit more than you...'
The 'You can lead a horse to water...' theory holds true for some.
I could go on... and I do [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
No bubble baths for me. You know where my happiness at the end of night comes from...
Jason
---------------
As for doign whats 'wrong' -- You do what NEEDS to be done, as a parent. If the child is 'ok' with certain things, why 'rock the boat'... Now if your child is constantly reacting, and you're BF'ing, and you want to start eating lobster, well... thats another story. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
But if you've hit 'baseline', get comfy with the products you use, and don't switch.
Example: We buy this ONE specific strawberry jelly for Caitlin. Its from Whole Foods (HERO, I think). Im sure we could use something cheaper (Smuckers?) but you know what.. Cant switch mid-stream [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
------------------
[b]* Obsessed * [/b]

Posted on: Thu, 03/30/2006 - 4:59am
notnutty's picture
Offline
Joined: 03/15/2004 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by jtolpin:
[b]...No, my story isn't for everyone. But (and Im seriously NOT talking here - just 'out there) when someone asks for help, and you give your story, and its ignored completely, and they go about their merry way and do what they're doing, I just sit here go think 'Why DID you ask for help? Why are you wasting my time? There are others that would benefit more than you...'
The 'You can lead a horse to water...' theory holds true for some.....
[/b]
I am not sure I am following where this comes from??? Are you talking about people in the GENERAL public...or people on THIS board??
I often appreciate your comments because usually they are very straight to the point and honest...
I think I am missing something from the discussion?? Or I am not very sharp today, because suddenly I am feeling lost!
Donna

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