Crazy mother-in-law rant

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 5:14am
madtypr's picture
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Joined: 12/01/2005 - 09:00

My poor DH had the misfortune of visiting his mom recently, thankfully he went alone. She laid into him about a myriad of things, one of which was our youngest son's PA. Apparently it's ALL MY FAULT! According to her (she is an R.N. and has a list of degrees as long as your arm, so of course that makes her some type of god) if I had not fed him any peanut butter until he was 3 he wouldn't be allergic! Wow! Now we have the answer - aren't you all so glad LOL. I am so very, very glad I was not there and that she lives many miles away from us.

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 5:40am
saknjmom's picture
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Joined: 04/02/2003 - 09:00

Oh, well that is just an awful and IGNORANT thing to say.
If she's so smart about food allergies, she should have given you this warning ahead of time. I would also ask her for the literature that shows this guarantee. I withheld peanut butter/nuts from my ds who had an anaphylactic reaction at the age of 4 years, 3 months almost to the day.
Unfortunately, there are going to be many days of dealing with crazy people over this allergy. Best to let it slide right by!
Hugs and don't worry about her!!!!

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 6:03am
Corvallis Mom's picture
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Joined: 05/22/2001 - 09:00

Hmmmmm.... wonder if she's any relation to the friend's MIL that nastily proclaimed that to her son and DIL that Down's syndrome is "always the WOMAN's fault" upon the birth of their trisomy daughter?
People are stupid. And mean. This sucketh mightily.
{{hugs}} (Good thing you were miles away, right? No need to post 'bail' that way. LOL!)

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 6:31am
momll70's picture
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Joined: 09/26/2006 - 09:00

We avoided and still have PA. (((Hugs))) That's a horible thing to say, especially since she herself is a mom. Some people can be so mean. I've had people tell me it's my fault because I have PA along with other allergies. And I have people tell me my son is PA because I never gave him peanutbutter. Some people expect for me to give him traces because they believe that it would densitize him. I think it's so mean. And I don't care what degrees anyone has - some people don't have a clue. (((Hugs))) again.

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 7:05am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

Quote:Originally posted by madtypr:
[b] Apparently it's ALL MY FAULT! According to her ... if I had not fed him any peanut butter until he was 3 he wouldn't be allergic![/b]
Um! Ya! OK!
You are all bad mothers. (shame on you)
But, honestly, I never fed my son insects. NEVER! So, could you ask her how he got his allergy? (Enquiring minds want to know. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img] )
I did feed my kids pb when they were little. They have no food allergies though. (Oh my! Could it be she's [i]wrong[/i]?)
********
Can you tell I'm in a nasty and sarcastic mood today. I'll go a few rounds with her for you. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img]

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 7:49am
madtypr's picture
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Joined: 12/01/2005 - 09:00

Thanks so much for the support! I really do just take her with a grain of salt, she's just an idiot as far as I'm concerned - all book learning and absolutely NO common sense. She's just so darn smug about everything, truly thinks she KNOWS-IT-ALL! GRRRRR.
BTW, DH brought up to her one of our daughter's teachers that was just diagnosed with PA and she's in her 30s, but that didn't matter lol.

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 7:52am
madtypr's picture
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Joined: 12/01/2005 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by momll70:
[b]That's a horible thing to say, especially since she herself is a mom. [/b]
Oh, her being a mom means absolutely nothing. He was told during the same visit that if she'd known that heart disease ran in his dad's family she'd have never had children! She's told me on more than one occasion she didn't want kids (but she had 4!).

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 7:54am
madtypr's picture
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Quote:Originally posted by Corvallis Mom:
[b]Hmmmmm.... wonder if she's any relation to the friend's MIL that nastily proclaimed that to her son and DIL that Down's syndrome is "always the WOMAN's fault" upon the birth of their trisomy daughter?
[/b]
Oh my goodness! I think that's the worst thing I've ever heard! God bless your friend and her family!!!

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 9:12am
becca's picture
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Joined: 05/22/2001 - 09:00

Very good thing she lives far, far away! Yuck. Hugs, that was horrible to say.
becca

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 9:32am
Sarahb's picture
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Joined: 01/22/2007 - 09:00

Huh...well I waited until ds was 3 and he is still PA. I think it's HER fault!

Posted on: Thu, 08/23/2007 - 11:47pm
lilysmom's picture
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Joined: 07/20/2007 - 09:00

Is she also a "clipper" you know the one that clips every article about food allergies and hands them to you like "you haven't done your research" So glad you weren't there poor DH.

Posted on: Fri, 08/24/2007 - 3:20am
gw_mom3's picture
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Joined: 02/14/2000 - 09:00

My dd is 11 and has NEVER had pb or peanuts and she is allergic (via skin testing). So apparently that logic isn't always true.
------------------
==============
[b]~Gale~[/b]

Posted on: Fri, 08/24/2007 - 5:46am
Mom2Ian's picture
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Joined: 02/26/2007 - 09:00

Well I wonder how Ms Allknowing would explain this one. With DD child number one I took a rather relaxed approach to everything. I ate peanuts, nuts and other foods we are advised not to. I let her eat PB around two. But with DS child three (after losing one infant at birth). I was more aware of all that can go wrong and I followed all the "rules". Want to guess which one has FAs?
You bet DS. He never had Peanuts until he stole a PB cracker from his sister at 22m luckily it was not a bad reaction ( in fact I didn't even connect it to the PB until after the testing).
Your MIL seems like one of those people who thinks everything can be controlled and therefore when a problem occurs someone must be to blame and of course it's not her. If life has taught me anything it's that we give them the best chance we can but that

Posted on: Fri, 08/24/2007 - 6:58am
madtypr's picture
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Joined: 12/01/2005 - 09:00

My MIL is also a "clipper" lol - sad to know there are more of them out there!
My PA DS is the youngest of five and ALL of them had tastes of peanut butter at very early ages (I didn't know any different) - and I ate PB throughout all of my pregnancies, and breastfed all of them - so her reasoning holds no water at all. Just something else to blame on me lol.

Posted on: Fri, 05/01/2009 - 11:13am
lisascottjeff's picture
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Joined: 05/01/2009 - 17:15

My MIL thinks I should seek counseling with my PA 11 y/o son because he is scared of having another reaction at school because of many issues there recently and she feels that my fighting for him at school has made him paranoid....duh...could it be the fact that a staff member was unaware the school was peanut free and gave another child his leftover peanut butter cup..how about the fact that he was threatened by another child with a candy bar..(another situation that was handled promptly).nope...its me...I need help...must be...besides since he didn't go into shock either time, his allergy can't be that bad.....UGHHGHHGHHGHG....

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