I have to come back later and post. I thought I backed out before it posted.
[This message has been edited by saknjmom (edited July 23, 2007).]
Camp Vent
Posted on: Mon, 07/23/2007 - 12:19am
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Long story shortened.
Camp started today. We've previously attended this camp. They have accommodated DS with pn free lunch table, pn free selection of afternoon snack for him and everyone in his group etc.
The nurse I've dealt with in the past is on vacation and the nurse today was so rude and inconsiderate that I could have choked her. It is a bible camp, so I tried to be a good christian and show patience with this twit of a nurse.
I asked if we could speak with DS's counselor and make him aware of the allergy situation and make arrangements for lunch and for snack time.
She was like, if your 9 year old son can't manage his allergies by now, he shouldn't be at camp. He should know by now not to make a snack selection that is unsafe. Further informed me that he would be sitting in her office for lunch.
I explained that in the past, the nurse and I went to the canteen and selected safe snacks for his entire group. This would reduce risks of contact reactions and ensure that the counselor filled his snack bin with some safe choices for DS. I asked her why he would be sitting in her office for lunch. She said based on my level of concern and the fact that my son doesn't seem to know how to manage his allergies, that it would be best.
I was like what are you talking about???? He manages very well. I am just trying to be sure that others who are CARING for him ALSO know how to help him if he needs it.!
I told her that if PN free table is not being offered, that it would be agreeable if he sat on the end of a table that is cleaned along with the chair, with his buddy next to him and someone across from him who isn't eating PB.
Then, she goes on this tirade about which is it? Is he really THAT allergic or are you so controlling that you are selective about accommodations.
Honest to God, I was not being rude, pushy, demanding or anything with this woman. What a horrible woman she was.
I walked over to my son, told him that I may be back to pick him up. I gave him my cell phone, told him to call me IMMEDIATELY if he felt uncomfortable or anything was going wonky.
I drove home, called the director and let her have it.
She apologized profusely, said she recalled my letter about their canteen selections as well as concerns from other parents and had eliminated all nuts from the canteen etc. She said that she would go see DSs counselor and be sure that he was set for lunch and that she would read the labels and be sure there were no may contains in his snack box.
15 minutes later, I was speaking with a newly humbled nurse who blamed her bad behavior on a really bad morning.
What is it with people saying that kids need to learn to deal with life and peanuts? I agree to a point, but just like at school, children are not 100% in control of their situations. I hate this allergy some days, I really do. So this woman's "bad morning" transferred to me having a bad morning and an anxiety filled day....
Thanks for listening...
Ouch.
I get the entire [i]"O...M... G!!!! You are being [b]such[/b] a pain in my backside...."[/i] from people who don't really understand how serious this can be.
But you do expect better behavior from some people. A camp nurse included. Geez.
In similar situations, I [i]have[/i] resorted to (only when the situation [i]truly[/i] called for it) baldly [i]asking[/i] the person, "Why are you trying to make my child feel [b]even worse[/b] about her allergies? Don't you think she knows by now [b]better than anyone else[/b] what a pain this is? How she's 'not like the other kids'? Or did you think she or I needed reminding?"
But this is pretty powerful stuff-- most decent people absolutely BLANCH at any part of that.
Sorry that your day started out so badly. I sure hope your DS wasn't standing there for this entire exchange.
[This message has been edited by Corvallis Mom (edited July 23, 2007).]
That nurse is a real gem! It would've taken every single ounce of my willpower not to slap her face.
Good for you for handling it exactly right and putting her in her place the right way.
For heaven's sake, he's nine, not nineteen! I know that your ds is very responsible, but he is still a child, and he is being left in the care of adults because *he's a child*!!! Of course those adults need to be made aware of everything pertaining to his allergy, no matter how responsible a kid he is.
Sorry the nurse was such a witch to you. I imagine the ditrector let her have it and good, hence her newly humbled attitude!
That person would have been a witch if she had filled in for Mother Theresa. If a person is an ass, it doesn't matter if they have "His Holiness" after their name, let alone "RN". Character (or the lack of it) supercedes any title.
Oh, and did I mention I pass by the offer of agency nurses the district provides for field trips and attend [i]personally[/i]? (It would cost them a pretty penny and it's written into his IEP.) [i]Hypothetically,[/i], in a [i]perfect world[/i], they should be able to fill the regular school nurse's shoes and match her level of knowledge concerning my son, but in reality? I'm not depending on it.
------------------
"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity."
LOL!!!! Love the new tag-line, MB. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/cool.gif[/img]
Well, my ds is home. Came home crying. He is not one to cry unless things are really bad.
Apparently, he wasn't given an icepop at treat time. DS asked the lady (I don't know who it was) to read the label for strawberry and pn/tn x. The lady wouldn't give him one because she was worried that Red #40 might be strawberries.?! I asked him if she offered him anything else. Of course not.
Then, he was seated alone at a table for lunch and only upon protest allowed to have his buddy sit with him. Then, he skinned his knee, went to the nurse and she was eating a Milky Way. He asked her to wash her hands and she said, um this doesn't have nuts!!! Then she proceeded to tell him tsk tsk since you skinned your knee, no band aids allowed in the pool tomorrow!
So, unfortunately we will not be going back to this camp. I just left a message for the director. I will be asking for a pro rated portion of my tuition returned.
I am so disappointed. DS came home from this camp the past two years with such a great attitude, so happy and was looking so forward to today.
I was so sad for him I cried with him. My son is such a trooper, rarely goes into pity party mode. Today must have just been too much.
[This message has been edited by saknjmom (edited July 23, 2007).]
Just want to say sorry and I can't believe these morons are associated with a church!
Your DS doesn't deserve that or need to be around that type of negativity. Why don't you take him somewhere special this week to make up for it.
People can be so hateful.....
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I think you should take it to a "higher power."
Not that you have to give us this info, but if this camp is based at a church, I would definitely write a letter--very factual--to the Sr. pastor and to the head of the decision making body (elders, etc.) And to the person in the church responsible for ministry to childre--staff and committee members.
If it is more of a denominational camp--based out of the wider body of a denomination--I'd do something similar. I'd write to the head of that body and to the person responsible for camps.
I would definitey use religious language in my letter to appeal to them. Excluding a person like this is sin in my book. Treating others like they are not important--and treating children this way especially (you could recall in your letter how Jesus welcomed them)--is chief among sins. Call it for what it is. This camp should be ashamed they let this happen.
Now, w/r to the ice cream treat, I can see how it's possible that they don't know if anything is safe. I wouldn't run a risk in making that kind of determination.
But if this person were nicer, I could see heading off any future problems with food by taking all of your DS' food. However, it's clear that she is not really looking out for him--that she's not treating him with respect and love. I wouldn't want my child to return to the camp either.
I think that if it wasn't for the way I was treated earlier in the day, I would chalk it up to "they are just being careful".
BUT, that is why I asked to go to the canteen as I have done in previous years. I okayed certain foods. If the nurse wouldn't have been so nasty in reprimanding me for him for not being able to choose a safe treat, this wouldn't have happened. BTW, my son is VERY capable of choosing a safe treat. I'm still wondering how Red dye #20 equates to strawberries???
The director who PROMISED me that she would go right down to the counselor and be sure things were set with DS and that she would do the end of the table thing, apparently DID NOT.
What about a nurse a. refusing to wash her hands at the request of my son since she was eating a candy bar and b. what about his safety and hers as well. He was bleeding. She is going to deal with an open wound without washing her hands or putting on gloves????
Something is off at this camp this year. REally off. Maybe they don't want to deal with allergy kids, who knows.
Thanks for the advice about the letter mccobbre.
In fact, the director opened camp this morning by thanking Jesus for sending all these sweet souls to the camp and asked Him to bless and watch over the camp.
All I am asking for is some compassion and consideration from these people. I am so disheartened right now.
Thanks for the replies guys, you all are the best.
[This message has been edited by saknjmom (edited July 23, 2007).]
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