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Posted on: Wed, 09/07/2005 - 1:09pm
MommaBear's picture
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Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by stuffguy:
[b]
But it is the skills that you give to your kids that will make the difference between life and death. I betcha I can read labels a whole lot faster than you can, and pay much more attention to what happens to my food, or what I eat. [/b]
ok. I'm sure now. [i]You don't know me [b]at all[/b][/i]. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/tongue.gif[/img]
Quote:[b]Desserts were pretty much stricken from my lifestyle years ago, as they're the most untrustworthy food around, and it just isn't worth the energy to audit someone's margarine. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
That said, your kids are exposed to even more danger after leaving the house. As an example: only a few years ago, I had a roommate who made herself a peanut-butter sandwich, then put the knife back into the drawer, in a fit of absent-mindedness. Things happen, even in adulthood. Only watchfulness stops things like that from becoming tragic.
I am happy to flip through the more recent postings, and I'm glad to see that those who were so freaked out in the beginning are beginning to realize that one can live with the allergy, and that it's not the end of the world.
It requires a food watchfulness that most people never have to deal with, and the turning-down of lots of "there's no nuts in them" goodies, but it's really not that hard to do once you get used to it.
[/b]
so are you saying *this* kind of stuff is [i]news[/i] to me? To my 5 year old? To my 10 year old?
ps..........[b]EEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWW. ICK ICK ICK![/b] putting *used* utensils back in drawers??! I'M GONNA HURL.
My cubs do not do that. Allergies aside, they are [i]meticulous[/i] about their eating utensils, dishes, glasses, [i]you name it[/i]. We don't even *touch* the business ends of the silverware in this house with our hands. That's a "no-no". [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img]

Posted on: Wed, 09/07/2005 - 2:19pm
stuffguy's picture
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Joined: 05/20/2002 - 09:00

MommaBear;
As much as I've tried be nice, I'm afraid I can resist no longer;
To be blunt: You are ignorant, arrogant and naive. You have no idea what you're talking about, yet you place yourself in the position of making life and death decisions for your children based upon your own knowledge.
So, tell me.. What does a reaction feel like? Not observations. What does it feel like? What does ingesting a peanut feel like? "Umm, my kid says it feel like this..". Does that mean you don't know? I betcha I don't know exactly what your "cub" is feeling, but I betcha I know better than you. Why is your kid knowing what a reaction feels like, anyhow? Aren't you the one telling me you know how to prevent them?
Blistered airway? Ever experienced one of those? It takes a pretty hefty concentration to make it that far, and any "blistered airway" is gonna come with "blistered mouth" long before hand. Stuff has only one path to to the throat, and that's through lots of tender tissues.
"I've taken care of probably far more individuals with anaphylaxis than episodes you've experienced. And not all from peanuts. Actually, *none* from peanuts."
This makes you an expert how? Bee-stings are not peanuts, even though the kits were the same before epi-pens.
Congrats on the lentils. You've discovered a new allergy that rivals peanuts in their fatal severity. Pat yourself on the back. Yay you! Ban lentis! Lentils should be illegal!
Ahh. You and your cubs. You don't need luck. You've got fate watching out for you.
Far be it from me to question your lion-spotting ability. You do seem to be the guru here, and I bow before your superior knowledge. Not to mention your superior ability to control what other people in the world do. I'm sure you could have stopped the roomie from dropping a contaminated knife back into the drawer. I only wish you'd been my mom, and I wouldn't have had to worry about it.
But really, since you know everything, I've got nothing to tell you. **** , maybe you can teach me how to properly deal with the allergy so that I may learn from your omnipotence.. It's a wonder I've stayed alive this long without being blessed by your mothering hand. Please, enlighten me as to the secrets I've missed.
You, my dear, are a putz. To attack someone who doesn't have a PA child, has no stake in this forum, who's lived with it for many years and is willing to share advice is just dumb. If you were to listen and simply disagree, then I could respect you. You current actions don't allow me to do so.
There's a reason there's a three-year gap in my postings. Others like you surfaced the first time around and gave me a major case of "don't give a d.a.m.n". It's hard to care about the kids when parents act the way you (and others) do. You'll all learn in time, though the hard way instead of by the experiences of those who've gone before.
But that's your choice. And I know you know better. Like the other woman said, until you have kids you can't know anything about having a peanut allergy, forgetting that there are those of us who've grown up having it.
I'll let you resume this forum being your own private pity-party. Whine about manufacturers, and schools, and anyone who doesn't accommodate the deadly threat against your child. Reality is going to set in no matter what you do.
And it's not really just you. You've just seemed to offer yourself up as representative of all the ignorant and paranoid moms out there.
Three years. I've been away from here for over three years, and there still exists no decent transfer of information to the newbies. Folks from three years ago have changed their tunes and embraced reality, but they haven't passed it along to the new folks. Isn't that the point of having a forum like this?
Really, I'm only here because the allergy is not an easy thing to live with. You may think otherwise, but you already know how I value your opinion. I'm glad I don't need to learn from it.
A PA is a difficult thing to navigate without singling yourself out as infirm, and depending on your life-state, that can be a social life-sentence unto itself.
So, feel free to pick this apart, and tell me how wrong I am, and how right you are. You've driven me from caring, so it's likely that I'll check in again in another three years to see if you've grown-up any.
Cheers, and everyone be sure to ask MommaBear for advice, as she surely knows it all (disclaimer aside).
*sigh* Later all..

Posted on: Wed, 09/07/2005 - 8:52pm
MommaBear's picture
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Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by stuffguy:
[b]MommaBear;
As much as I've tried be nice, I'm afraid I can resist no longer;
To be blunt: You are ignorant, arrogant and naive. You have no idea what you're talking about, yet you place yourself in the position of making life and death decisions for your children based upon your own knowledge.
So, tell me.. What does a reaction feel like? Not observations. What does it feel like? What does ingesting a peanut feel like? "Umm, my kid says it feel like this..". Does that mean you don't know? I betcha I don't know exactly what your "cub" is feeling, but I betcha I know better than you. Why is your kid knowing what a reaction feels like, anyhow? Aren't you the one telling me you know how to prevent them?
Blistered airway? Ever experienced one of those? It takes a pretty hefty concentration to make it that far, and any "blistered airway" is gonna come with "blistered mouth" long before hand. Stuff has only one path to to the throat, and that's through lots of tender tissues.
"I've taken care of probably far more individuals with anaphylaxis than episodes you've experienced. And not all from peanuts. Actually, *none* from peanuts."
This makes you an expert how? Bee-stings are not peanuts, even though the kits were the same before epi-pens.
Congrats on the lentils. You've discovered a new allergy that rivals peanuts in their fatal severity. Pat yourself on the back. Yay you! Ban lentis! Lentils should be illegal!
Ahh. You and your cubs. You don't need luck. You've got fate watching out for you.
Far be it from me to question your lion-spotting ability. You do seem to be the guru here, and I bow before your superior knowledge. Not to mention your superior ability to control what other people in the world do. I'm sure you could have stopped the roomie from dropping a contaminated knife back into the drawer. I only wish you'd been my mom, and I wouldn't have had to worry about it.
But really, since you know everything, I've got nothing to tell you. **** , maybe you can teach me how to properly deal with the allergy so that I may learn from your omnipotence.. It's a wonder I've stayed alive this long without being blessed by your mothering hand. Please, enlighten me as to the secrets I've missed.
You, my dear, are a putz. To attack someone who doesn't have a PA child, has no stake in this forum, who's lived with it for many years and is willing to share advice is just dumb. If you were to listen and simply disagree, then I could respect you. You current actions don't allow me to do so.
There's a reason there's a three-year gap in my postings. Others like you surfaced the first time around and gave me a major case of "don't give a d.a.m.n". It's hard to care about the kids when parents act the way you (and others) do. You'll all learn in time, though the hard way instead of by the experiences of those who've gone before.
But that's your choice. And I know you know better. Like the other woman said, until you have kids you can't know anything about having a peanut allergy, forgetting that there are those of us who've grown up having it.
I'll let you resume this forum being your own private pity-party. Whine about manufacturers, and schools, and anyone who doesn't accommodate the deadly threat against your child. Reality is going to set in no matter what you do.
And it's not really just you. You've just seemed to offer yourself up as representative of all the ignorant and paranoid moms out there.
Three years. I've been away from here for over three years, and there still exists no decent transfer of information to the newbies. Folks from three years ago have changed their tunes and embraced reality, but they haven't passed it along to the new folks. Isn't that the point of having a forum like this?
Really, I'm only here because the allergy is not an easy thing to live with. You may think otherwise, but you already know how I value your opinion. I'm glad I don't need to learn from it.
A PA is a difficult thing to navigate without singling yourself out as infirm, and depending on your life-state, that can be a social life-sentence unto itself.
So, feel free to pick this apart, and tell me how wrong I am, and how right you are. You've driven me from caring, so it's likely that I'll check in again in another three years to see if you've grown-up any.
Cheers, and everyone be sure to ask MommaBear for advice, as she surely knows it all (disclaimer aside).
*sigh* Later all..[/b]
[i]golf clap[/i].

Posted on: Wed, 09/07/2005 - 9:14pm
MommaBear's picture
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Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by stuffguy:
[b]So, tell me.. What does a reaction feel like? Not observations. What does it feel like? What does ingesting a peanut feel like? "Umm, my kid says it feel like this..". Does that mean you don't know? I betcha I don't know exactly what your "cub" is feeling, but I betcha I know better than you. Why is your kid knowing what a reaction feels like, anyhow? Aren't you the one telling me you know how to prevent them?[/b]
(biting nails) [i]shrieeeeeeeeeeek[/i] I had better turn in my professional license since I haven't experienced the vast majority of ailment of the people I care for, huh?
Quote:[b]Blistered airway? Ever experienced one of those? It takes a pretty hefty concentration to make it that far, and any "blistered airway" is gonna come with "blistered mouth" long before hand. Stuff has only one path to to the throat, and that's through lots of tender tissues.]b]
last time I checked, my cubs mouth *was* part of his "airway". [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/tongue.gif[/img] Maybe it's just him. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/tongue.gif[/img] [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/tongue.gif[/img]
I also don't necessarily assume mast cell concentration in various tissues from person to person are *exactly the same*.
General Disclaimer: [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/tongue.gif[/img] I am not offering advice in any manner or form. I am just musing. IMMV.

Posted on: Wed, 09/07/2005 - 9:19pm
williamsmummy's picture
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Joined: 03/26/2002 - 09:00

Stuffguy,
its good that you have started posting, we need the adults with allergies here.
I find most of your statements and opinons match my own, and if anything, you would be of more help to the newbies by hanging around than me as a mother.
Nothing is more comforting that knowing that life as an allergic adult is OK
I know that a normal life is achievable with food allergies. They certainly make life more complicated.
In the uk , when i was a child foods were more simple.
When 'Wendys' first came to the UK the beef burgers and fries were eaten with a knife and fork, and the knickerbocker glories all were a rare treat, for birthdays and special occasions.
Food at home was still simple, meat and two veg.
Food now is more complicated, food in our days was not made to be aimed at children, nor huge advertising campaigns to urge children to use pester power.
Mosts foods as you know have huge complicated labels, and we need a chemistry degree to understand them at times.
Its this that is making the whole area of providing a safe meal for our children difficult.
UK as the added problem of having no clear access to the correct medical care for allergies, no matter how big your purse is!
but thats just us!
I agree with the idea of peanut bans being a shakey sort of security. I would prefer a more 'peanut aware' attitude.
Esp for children over 7. Before avoidance in a school situation is required.
With many parents on this board , i have a child with multiple allergies, the idea of removing just one, will not work.
I am lucky in the fact that not every single child at my sons school( 250 pupils) will bring in peanut butter, which must raise the risk of cross contamination. But still, my son has not had a reaction from the many who sit next to my son , while eating messy foods that william is allergic to.
I to am of the opinon that air bourne reactions are rare, and dont worry about contact reactions.
Hives, limbs swelling, are all minor symptoms. And quite frankly are something that is going to happen, and not all related to food in my sons case.
The fact that you are alive and well, and seem to be educated in avoidance of your allergens, is good enough for me to listen to you views.
thank you.
sarah

Posted on: Wed, 09/07/2005 - 11:26pm
anonymous's picture
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Joined: 05/28/2009 - 16:42

I would like to say that over the last months I have read Momma Bear's posts almost every day, on some topic or another. Over that time, I have come to respect her opinions, and often agree with them, but not always.
Being relatively new here, I had never read anything posted by Stuffguy until this week. I do agree with some of what he has to say, but not all. But I also realize that he is entitled to a different opinion than my own, I know I'm not always right. But I think that sometimes Stuffguy uses some harsh phrasing in his posts, which might put someone on the defensive.
Now, I think it is safe to assume that Momma Bear does not know what it is like to grow up with PA, or any severe food allergy. I also think that it is safe to say that Stuffguy doesn't know what it is like to have a child who has PA. I think they would be two very different experiences, leading to different points of view, and thus to different opinions.
I know that in other aspects, I am much more protective of my children than for myself. Their health and well-being is more important to me than my own. That, Stuffguy, is why we mothers seem so overprotective to you (and by the way, there are many different levels of motherly protection on this site). And Mommabear, that is also why Stuffguy's attitude seems so cavalier to you.
This disagreement between you has gotten personal, and I urge you both to just realize that you each have a different point of view and move on.
[This message has been edited by Jimmy's mom (edited September 08, 2005).]

Posted on: Thu, 09/08/2005 - 12:34am
Adele's picture
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Joined: 01/31/2005 - 09:00

I understand stuffguy's point but I still think he is unrealistic when it comes to younger kids.
In a previous post I compared his argument (educating kids to avoid PA rather than avoidance) to the way we educate little kids NOT to run into the street - look both ways, etc.
Stuffguy, would you trust your 5 year old to play on a sidewalk (edge of a busy road) unsupervised, and as you have educated the kid about not running into the street, you're going to go into your house, close the door and be confident that the child won't screw up? oh - I forgot. You don't have a kid.

Posted on: Thu, 09/08/2005 - 2:22am
Anonymous's picture
Anonymous (not verified)

MB....Stuffguy
Both of you - back into your corner's NOW!
Stuffguy, you are barking up the wrong tree. You might want to search out some of MommaBears posts regarding sending kids to school. Read what she's said about bans, and how schools can effectively deal with students with food allergies. (Just a thought.)
(Hint - look for threads with LOTS of pages of posts. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img] )
**********
I agree with something that williams mommy said - your posting probably does help a lot of new parents that are here. It can be so overwhelming at first, and seeing adults that grew up with this - and are still alive to tell about it - that's gotta feel good. (I'm an adult with pa, but mine is adult on-set. I just don't think I offer that same piece of relief that people like you can.)

Posted on: Thu, 09/08/2005 - 2:30am
erik's picture
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Joined: 05/15/2001 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by AnnaMarie:
[b]It can be so overwhelming at first, and seeing adults that grew up with this - and are still alive to tell about it - that's gotta feel good.[/b]
Yes, I am always surprised how so many mothersb here think that it is the end of the world since their child has been diagnosed with PA. It's not that big a deal.
Looking at alternatives (cystic fibrosis, leukemia, etc), I would choose PA any day. PA does not restrict me at all. I can live a normal life and do everything that everyone else can do (with the exception of eating peanuts). I am not disabled at all. I live a full life. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

Posted on: Thu, 09/08/2005 - 2:51am
MommaBear's picture
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Joined: 09/23/2002 - 09:00

Quote:Originally posted by erik:
[b]
Looking at alternatives (cystic fibrosis, leukemia, etc), I would choose PA any day. PA does not restrict me at all. I can live a normal life and do everything that everyone else can do (with the exception of eating peanuts). I am not disabled at all. I live a full life. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]
[/b]
oo-oo--oo!! Does this mean I can reraise my "Magic Wand" thread?
[img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img]

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