2nd child just diagnosed with pa, please help...

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Hi, Where do I start? My youngest dd was diagnosed with pa/tna Dec./04. After much stress and worry, I was coming to terms with it all and figured I would have a good handle on it all by the time she went to school (she's 2). Well my world has just gotten crappier. On Wednesday past my dh took our oldest dd (5yrs) to the allergist to have her tested for grass, dust, and dogs. While they were there he happened to mention that our other dd has a pn/tn allergy. She decided to test our oldest to rule it out. Much to our surprise and disbelief she tested positive and is a three for peanuts. I feel like I will never be able to cope with two children with PA. (This might be exaggerated by the fact that I have a three week old newborn and am living on 3 hrs broken sleep a night...) Is anyone else living with 2 children with pa? I am not prepared for the start of school with this and am trying to get my head around it all. I feel very sorry for my children and for myself. I'm blaming myself, I'm mad at my MIL for passing on bad genes to dh. Will this ever get better? Sorry for the vent, I'd appreciate any input. Thanks, Gilli

On Aug 20, 2005

Gilli011,

See thread I just reraised called "Devastated"

Margaret

On Aug 20, 2005

Hi Gilli, I am so sorry to hear that your older child is PA too. I can only imagine how hard it would be to worry about two of them when you can only be in one place at a time. My son is PA and I had my younger daughter tested to see. Luckily she wasn't. I know what you mean about being mad at yourself. I have been angry and felt terribly guilty after reading somewhere that eating peanut products during pregnancy may be what caused it. All we can do is love our kids and protect them in every way we can. Good luck. I said a prayer for God to be with you and your children in whatever you have ahead of you.

On Aug 21, 2005

Hello Gilli, I'm sorry to hear that you now have to cope with 2 kids with PA. As far as I know it is still not a proven fact that PA is caused by the mother eating PN products while pregnant or nursing. The tendency to have FA can be inherited but not the specific allergy. No sense in beating yourself up - or your MIL. Along with the bad genes come up all the wonderful things that make your kids who they are.

Easy for me to say, I know. Best wishes, Adele

On Aug 21, 2005

Hi Gilli,

Indeed, I only deal with one PA child in my household, but I just wanted to post my support to you. I'm sure most of us felt as you do upon first learning of our childs' allergies -- whether it be a first or second (or subsequent!) child!

All I can say is that I recognized your feelings of helplessness (not to mention your feelings of sleep deprivation!!) and things WILL get better. You already have a peanut-free household, so you don't have that stress this time around.

I know you will adjust, as we all did. And you always have all of us here to lean on.

In the meantime, I'm sure I remember several other parents here with more than one PA child. If nothing else there are plenty of people here with more than one child with different FAs.

<< Hugs! >> to you!

On Aug 21, 2005

Gilli, I can so relate, and hopefully help. My son is now 8. He was dx with PA when he was 10 months old. I had my then 4 yo daughter tested before she started Pre4K last year. I totally did not expect her to be PA. Boy was I wrong. Her Dr. was even shocked. She is also allergic to Brazil nuts. She is now 5, and getting ready this to start all day Kindergarten. My son was just retested, as it has been 4 years since his last test. I was foolishly hopeful that his level would come down. We also retested for TN, although he tested NEGATIVE to it 4 years ago. Sure enough, he is allergic to TN now too. He is more allergic to cashews than peanuts. It never stops. He was upset, he is so allergic to other things as well, and he is just sick of it. Luckily we have always avoided TN anyway! Also, luckily, my kids school is a godsend of PA. They have worked with me so great. I know they are in good hands. All I can say to you is this....You are used to dealing with your younger child's PA, your older now PA child probably is used to not having peanuts around. The only problem I have had with the 2nd child having this allergy is that I always use my son in conversation about is PA. I sometimes have to remember to include my daughter as well. I always thought she wouldn't have it, now that I know she does, I will always make sure she is safe, but I always tend to just think of my son as the allergic one. She has never been exposed, never had a reaction, knock wood. My son has only had a rash on mouth as a reaction, and that was almost 5 years ago. Just remember, you have been dealing with it up to now. Work with your local school, your kids are most likely not the only ones there with food allergies. Be vigilant. You will be fine. Good luck, Sincerely, Amy, mom of 2 PA kids.

On Aug 22, 2005

Hi there, Thank you all so much for your kind words and suggestions. I'm still finding myself waking up in the morning with a knot in my stomach, but I realize this will pass as it did when we found out about our youngest dd. I have been reassured by several people that the school my dd will attend in Sept. is one of the safer places she will be. They are peanut free, the teachers are all trained in the use of epi-pens, children's pictures are posted in their classrooms and there are quite a few children in the school with the allergy (apparently fairly high number for the size of the school). I suppose if there is one positive twist I can put on having two PA children it's that they will have the support of one another and won't go this route alone. My mother always tells me that God will never give me any more than I can handle, I remind myself of this daily and try to put this into perspective. I realize we could have recieved much worse news from a Dr. and I thank God every day that they are as healthy as they are, but I still find myself asking why my children. I want to make sure they lead a normal life and don't live in constant fear of this allergy while making sure we all do what we have to to be safe...here's hoping that our baby ds doesn't have this allergy, although I suppose I'd handle that too... Thanks again. It's great to have a place like this to come to. Cheers, Gilli

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