teacher doesn\'t get it

32 replies [Last post]
By mamagaona on Tue, 01-09-01, 00:20

I was going to post this to the school site, but really thought it fit here. Rebecca, age 6, has had a good year in school with a loving teacher who also has allergies including asthma. We have found out she is airborne sensitive and sits with only kids who do not eat peanut butter. The cafeteria ladies as well as those wonderful 1st graders are really good about it. Today she came home with a little note on a cutsie sunflower pad from her teacher. "We will be making bird feeders from peanut butter, bird seed and pinecones. Could Rebecca go to the teacher across the hall or sit in the back of the room?" I just can't believe it! Well I guess she could go anywhere, but doesn't the teacher want her to come back in the room sometime, and couldn't they use lard like in the pioneer days? Any suggestions? I already left a message and will be writing a note back. Incidentally, I teach also, but high school. Thanks for listening.
Arlene

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By J. Roberts on Tue, 01-09-01, 03:11

I don't know where you live, but I would personally suggest contacting the School Board and the local press and supplying them with copies of the offensive idea that your child be excluded due to her PA from the activity. I do not have children, but I am almost 29, and have had the allergy myself (Class 5) since I was 1 1/2. I don't believe in causing problems, either, but I would personally feel that your child's exclusion from the activity (without the teacher offering any sensible or compensating alternative but merely exiling her from the group) is highly discriminatory, not to mention could run the risk of other teachers using this situation as a precedent further down the line.
-- Julie

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By Sandra Y on Tue, 01-09-01, 03:53

It's outrageous, but I'd try to work it out with the teacher and if she doesn't cooperate, then go over her head.

This one is a no brainer. Buy a big can of Crisco and hand it to her as you explain why she CANNOT use peanut butter. Crisco works just as well.

And check the ingredients on the birdseed.

Stay calm but be FIRM. It's YOUR turn to teach the teacher! GOOD LUCK! (At our school the first grade teacher does this project every year, so I'll be facing this in a couple of years too. What is the fascination with this tired old project? My 8-yr-old non PA daughter has done this three or four times already in her school career!)

__________________

Sandra

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By rebekahc on Tue, 01-09-01, 06:13

Not only should they not use peanut butter for your daughter's sake (I find the teacher's note offensive btw), but peanut butter kills birds. I've heard for years you shouldn't use peanut butter for birdfeeders because it clogs the airholes in their beaks and they suffocate.

Rebekah

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By CVB in CA on Tue, 01-09-01, 06:37

On the birdseed, my child had a contact reaction this fall to Kaytee brand birdseed that was not labeled. They also manufacture a variety with "peanut hearts" so I presume it was cross contaminated. I emailed kaytee with suggestion they label all their products as produced in facility with peanuts, but got no answer. Just FYI.

I have some store brand bird seed that PA child handled without incident, but I don't recall the exact name. It's one that is almost entirely millet seed.

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By Caring Mom on Tue, 01-09-01, 11:46

Arlene,

This is an outrage. What is wrong with that teaher? She can't find another project for that classroom to do? I would not even allow her to do such a project. What about when they are finished, all the cross contanimation that will exist in that room?
All the students will have residue on themselves let alone the desks. Is your daughters classroom peanut free?

This goes to show the ignorance of adults, especially her being supposedly "well educated".
You don't understand how this gets me so upset for your daughter & other PA children.

I am not saying I would cause problems because, I wouldn't want my son to be an outcast. I would just get my point across very nicely, to whoever I had to(principal, nurse,teacher,etc.). Like J. Roberts said, she is being discriminated.

Good Luck & please let us know what happens.

Ronna

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By on Tue, 01-09-01, 15:00

This is outrageous! The first thing that came to mind was the classroom being completely contaminated with peanut butter. Then the fact you have 25+ kids to clean up and then washing down tables and then whatever gets spilled on the floor. What is this person thinking? Our children *feel* excluded enough having this allergy. It certainly doesn't need to blatently shoved in her face that she needs to go to another classroom while her classmates get to do a project together and she gets to sit in a class where she knows no one and all the kids get to stare at her and whisper as to why she is in there. In my children's school, kids get sent to another class for disciplinary problems.

Sitting in the back of the room is another slap in the face. What is the teacher going to do? "Here sweetie, sit back here and watch the rest of us have fun?" [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/mad.gif[/img]

I usually don't let things upset me anymore but this one has got me hot!

The birdseed, as others pointed out, is NOT safe! *Most* birdseed has peanuts in it.

This project is a health hazard! Please let us know the outcome...will it be canceled or will they use Crisco. And if the project is done with Lard, the *birdseed* is another potential health hazard.

I wish you luck!

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Stay Safe.

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By Caring Mom on Tue, 01-09-01, 15:59

Connie,

I totally agree & I still can't get this off my mind since, I read this post this morning.
I feel like this is my child being harmed because, people don't get it.

If anyone read my one reply under "How did PA effect your day today". Bobby was seperated from the other children, which was my fault & I was their.
I cried the whole time in the class & on the way home & the whole weekend because, he was excluded from the other children & I was so upset for him. I felt like it wasn't fair & this shouldn't happen to my child.

Connie you are right, are children feel like they are excluded as it is.
Why make the matters worse for them?

I am so outrage about this I am getting my blood pressure up because, (excuse me) people are STUPID. I never use that word directly but, I fear for that little girl in that teachers classroom. That teacher should really be given some education on PA/TA.

Let me go because, I am very upset.

Ronna

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By Caring Mom on Tue, 01-09-01, 16:16

Arlene,

I want to apologize for exploding on this thread & it was no way towards you. I just get very upset for our children & adults with PA. I want everyone to understand the severity of the allergy.

I hope you can come up with a way to resolve this matter without it affecting your repore with the teacher.

I just wanted to let you know from the bottom of my heart I am not directing anything towards you.

Good Luck
Ronna

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By on Tue, 01-09-01, 17:38

Caring Mom, I too felt this was personal and it could have happened to any of our children. I consider everyone on this board *family* and this just hit me so wrong! Reading Arlene's post, I felt this was my child being affected with the way the hair on the back of my neck stood up.

Arlene, thanks for posting this situation. It may help someone else out if faced with this same scenerio. Please let us know the outcome!

My rant was also directed toward the school, not to you! I just wanted to clarify that! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img]

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Stay Safe.

[This message has been edited by Connie (edited January 09, 2001).]

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By rilira on Tue, 01-09-01, 18:15

This really got to me also. Any child should never be excluded for any medical condition-EVER! We had an incident with nut cracking in Kindergarten and that was the original idea just remove my daughter from the activity or skip school that day. I got a letter from my ped. and my allergist stating the risk this activity was to my daughter. The letter stated how unsafe it would be for her to return to a classroom where this activity had taken place.

I would imagine the teacher would attempt to justify the project by saying it is a educational experience. Well if this is part of her education it is illegal for them to exclude your child due to a medical condition.

I could go on forever, this is one of my pet peeves!

Good Luck,
Linda

[This message has been edited by rilira (edited January 09, 2001).]

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By CarolynM on Tue, 01-09-01, 18:48

I agree with all of the previous posts. This is a totally unnecessary activity. I know this will not help you now Arlene, but for the future, this suggestion might help others: When I write my letters to the school at the beginning of the school year, I specifically mention these kinds of activities. I ask them to avoid any acitvity that involves nuts including art projects, bird feeders, and sack races with sacks that may have been used to hold peanuts. Some of the teachers have told me they have never thought of these things. (Which is no excuse for this teacher in this situation!) Good luck.

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By mamagaona on Tue, 01-09-01, 19:06

Thanks for your enormous support. I never realized there could be a problem with birdseed. Lots of allergies, no animals here.

Brought her home with headache today. Am waiting to hear about her 504 classification. Sure would help here I think.
Arlene

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By Caring Mom on Wed, 01-10-01, 01:03

Arlene aren't you from NJ?
I have the 504 form here at my house. I know for a fact the classroom has to remain peanut free. Also, they are not allowed to let other after school groups in her classroom. I have the whole list here. That teacher CAN NOT do anything with peanut butter or peanut products.

If you don't have a 504 form I will get you all the info. you need from it.

Good Luck

Ronna

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By mamagaona on Wed, 01-10-01, 01:33

Ronna-
Yes, I am in NJ, Monmouth county to be exact.
Please e-mail me with the 504 information. I couldn't access your e-mail from your post. I am very interested in what to ask for once I get in there. I am a Special Ed. teacher so I can write a mean IEP [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] but have no idea about a 504.
Thank you,
Arlene
BTW, I was not offended by anyone. I actually felt support and comaraderie, which I have no other way of getting. Thanks again.

[This message has been edited by mamagaona (edited January 09, 2001).]

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By on Wed, 01-10-01, 04:56

Arlene, I'm coming in very late in this thread, but I wanted you to know that I'm also extremely [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/mad.gif[/img] upset about this. I don't know how a teacher could have the nerve to say what she said - your daughter could be removed from the class or sit at the back of the class. WHAT? How would she feel if she was segregated in this manner and she is not a 6 year old child?

I definitely don't get it sometimes. I know, as others have posted above that you are protected by your 504 plan but I'm really not clear about them.

Birdseed. Cross-contamination. We have four bird feeders outside and I only purchase sunflower seeds now from a local farmer. I began to feel VERY uncomfortable with bird seed because of the cross contamination issue. Sunflower seeds I will not even cook with anymore because of the cross contamination issue. But, I do allow them in the bird feeders, bought from the one farmer only. Then, if Jesse does want to help me fill the feeders, I make sure that he comes in and washes his hands immediately. Now, should he ever have a reaction because of it, he wouldn't be able to help me anymore. But, you don't know how educational the bird feeders are for my children and I didn't want them to lose that.

I noticed down the way the birdfeeders have seed with shelled peanuts in them. And someone else very kindly posted a peanut butter free suet recipe for me for woodpeckers.

I think, for me, I would deal with the teacher first. Simply ask her if in her creative little mind could she not think of another project whereby all children could participate (sorry if I'm being sarcastic in my wording towards her but I am very upset).
Children are segregated for various reasons in school yards, etc. by other children. Our children, in all likelihood will experience this enough in their lives without having it dealt out by a teacher. I'm sorry, it is upsetting. I am positive there is another project that could replace this.

Please do not allow your daughter to be segregated. I get the sense that you wouldn't anyway.

Also, I did go in and post under PA Penpals that you wanted a penpal for your daughter.
I had read one of your initial posts in another thread and noticed that you hadn't found the PA Penpals one and perhaps hadn't had time to post in there, so I did. Now, it's just finding a match. I've had a hard time with that thread for some reason.

Please let us know how this turns out. I know that your daughter is not allowed to be discrimated against. Plain and simple. Find another project. And how dare she? The wording she used itself is just terribly offensive to ALL of us here and it's because we know that it could be our child and our hearts go out to you and yours.

Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

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By Caring Mom on Wed, 01-10-01, 16:43

Arlene,

I jusr emailed you the info. on the 504 form. Let me know if for some reason you didn't receive it.

Good Luck
Ronna

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By Caring Mom on Wed, 01-10-01, 16:44

Arlene,

I just emailed you the info. on the 504 form. Let me know if for some reason you didn't receive it.

Good Luck
Ronna

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By Diane on Wed, 01-10-01, 18:28

My daughter (only in Pre-K) came home from school with cherrios that she thread on a piece of yarn. Then the teacher tied the ends together so it formed a small like bracelet that she could hang on the tree for the birds.

Caring Mom-I too would be interested in the 504 info. She will be going to public school in Sept. I borrowed the FAN School Packet that they got. It too has alot of info regarding laws. Thanks.

Incidently, my daughter did this dumb PB birdfeeder project too. My friend that she was staying with completely forgot of her allergy. It was when she was first diagnosed. And they went to a carnival where there was a table set up for the kids to make them. Her face blew up and her eyes were swollen-one was completely shut for a few days.Of course I was in N.Y. and our vehicle broke down on the way home. A nightmare just thinking about it again!

Anyway I would suggest this to any teacher who wants to feed the birds in the winter. Cherrios and yarn! :-)

[This message has been edited by Diane (edited January 10, 2001).]

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By on Wed, 01-10-01, 18:52

Excellent substitute for the activity, Diane. Are you a teacher? I'm sorry, I'm being sarcastic again, which I shouldn't be, but why is it, that when a teacher knows she has a PA child in her classroom, she can't look for alternatives to the project she normally has? I can just see myself if this is presented as an activity at Jesse's school. I find it appalling - I don't even think for me it has to do with the PA, but the absolute bloody mess of the pb to begin with.

Now, I'm angry because Arlene's daughter was asked to be separated from her class by the teacher without any thought to the possible emotional repercussions this may have. Now, very often, I have found that our children "get it" better than we do and deal with "it" better than we do so Arlene's daughter might have been okay. However, when it comes to something like this, I don't believe it is okay to take a chance.

Your alternative idea was excellent and I think Arlene should present it to the teacher. I'll definitely keep it in mind if it is ever raised at Jesse's school. I am just still so upset with the teacher. I can't even believe it!

Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

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By mamagaona on Fri, 01-12-01, 01:18

Update on the pinecone situation. The teacher sent me another note saying Rebecca would be no where near the offending PB. This led me to believe she would be excluded from the activity and I knew that would bother her. Sooooooooo, I wrote her another letter and gave her your wonderful ideas about the cheerios as well as my phone #. She called this afternoon and you will all be happy to know that she has cancelled the project.

It turns out one of the kids grandparents had sent in pine cones that they had collected and the parent kept asking when they were going to do an activity with them. I mentioned to her that some of the kids might be allergic to the pinecones themselves and she thought it better to cancel the whole thing as she is asthmatic as well and pregnant to boot!

I also mentioned to her that I was wondering what had become of the work on Rebecca's 504. She said she would ask the Principal, who is in charge of 504's at the school, first thing tomorrow as she did not want to wait until she left on maternity leave at the end of March.

Incidentally the birdseed was safe, she had checked the label. She thanked me for now she reads all labels just to check in case. Love an educator who loves to be educated [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

So glad I listened to you all but was also patient.
Arlene

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By Diane on Fri, 01-12-01, 02:57

Another thing that I don't like about the kids working with pinecones is that I remember reading somewhere that ticks breed in them. I don't know if lymes is prevalent in your area or not. But it is here in NJ.

Anyway, Arlene, I'm glad that things went smoothly for you and your daughter and that the teacher wasn't narrow-minded in the end.

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By Caring Mom on Fri, 01-12-01, 14:01

Arlene,

I am so happy the situation turned out the way it did. I guess patience is the way to go.

Darlene,

I will email you the 504 form, I just saw the post. Sorry about that.

Ronna

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By on Fri, 01-12-01, 19:24

I'm really pleased to hear that the project got cancelled.

Definitely, in your situation, patience worked. It's unfortunate that it doesn't always in school situations, in particular, especially because you would like to appear calm, collected, and patient.

However, in trying to ensure the safety of our children, we very often can't afford the time to be patient. It's obviously a judgement call each and every one of us makes when dealing with the school.

I'm glad that patience worked for you and that the project was cancelled. I'm also really pleased that you had some excellent responses to your thread, in case the pb pine cones come up again through your daughter's school years!

Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

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By mamagaona on Sat, 01-13-01, 02:48

Cindy-
Yes I know patience isn't always something we have the luxury to employ. My DH always accuses me of being rash, even before the PA diagnosis so I suppose I am extra sensitive. Luckily this time we had time.
Thanks again,
Arlene

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By on Sat, 01-13-01, 07:06

Arlene, I think it's really positive that you were able to be patient with the school rather than what your husband suggests as rash. I often have to sit back, come in and post here and settle myself down. I don't often act rashly, but my soul, I do feel rash inside! I have to chill out and think things over really carefully.

I think it's extremely positive that you were able to do so and that you had the time to do so. I'm sorry if I appeared to condone you for having patience (remember, "patience is a virtue!). I didn't mean to. I was actually trying to remind other PA parents/people that we don't always have the time to be patient.

I just read a post to-day from a woman whose child is allergic to latex and some difficulties she was having with her child's school. Well, with this allergy and what had happened, she really doesn't have the time to be patient. She does have the time to sort out her school board policy and present it to the principal in a calm, collected manner, going over the points in her policy that should ensure her child's safety.

I think that's all I was trying to say. Please don't think I was saying anything negative about how you reacted.

And also, you did see that I have posted your daughter in the PA Penpals thread? I know that you had mentioned it in one of your original posts and I simply hope it was okay that I went in and posted it in the appropriate thread.

Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

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By supermom1023 on Sun, 01-14-01, 03:41

First let me say that if this is a public school the teacher is breaking the law. The Children With Disabilities Act states that public schools must accomodate children with food allergies. I would certainly talk to the super or school board. If they don't listen the press will. Check with someone who knows the law.

I have faced this problem with my daughter. We homeschool, but our group of 100 or so families meets one day a week for classes such as PE, sign language, etc. Last year my daughter was in "Kindergarten Klub" and her teachers(other mothers) told me the first day they would not give her an Epi shot if she needed it, also the President of the group. One day the teacher brought her out to me and said that they were planting seeds, peanuts, and asked me to keep her out of the room. A pizza place where Sara can't eat did a demo in class and I had to keep her home. But the one that really took the cake is when the teacher called on the morning of her valentine party and said that she had made sure all the candy was OK but had seen some cheap cookies(2\$1.00) and she "wasn't thinking" and didn't check them until just before she called. She told me I would have to take Sara out of class before the snack!

Private schools, Christian schools & Homeschool groups are not protected under the Children With Disability Act because we receive no government funding.

Praise God that our group now has a new president and the ones in charge of our "Monday School" will do whatever it takes to keep her safe. I have even been able to leave for little while and feel comfortable.

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By supermom1023 on Sun, 01-14-01, 04:10

I have had many problems with my daughter except not in public school. We homeschool and we are in a group of 100 or so families. We meet on Mondays and mothers teach classes our kids don't get at home...sign language, drama, art, etc.

Last year my daughter was in Kindergarten Klub and there were so many times I left in tears because they didn't even try to take care of my daughter. If something was going on that she couldn't be a part of I was expected to keep her home. This is a Christiian group and it was a select few that felt this way, but they happened to be the ones who had my daughter in class.

I had read that the Children with Disibilities Act made it illegal to treat a child differently. I did some investigating and calling. What I found out was that homeschool groups, christian and private schools are not covered under this act because we receive no funding from the government.

Public schools ARE COVERED by this act, making it illigal not to accomidate children with disibilities and food allergies fall in this category. Talk to someone who knows about this law. I found some info on the internet and made some phone calls and was sent the info I needed by mail. But it was given to the homeschool board and then to the president at that time and I've asked but not received it back or I would send it to you. Maybe someone else out there has that info. Try FAN, I think that's where I started.

By the way, our group has a new president and he and his wife and others, have no problem with giving Sara a shot or anything else she needs. I have even been able to leave for a time and not be too worried. Of course I don't stray too far and I keep my cell phone on!

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By supermom1023 on Sun, 01-14-01, 04:27

Sorry, I just read all the way through the tread and saw that I jumped the gun and the problem was already solved. I also noticed that the first message didn't get lost in my computer problem so I accidently posted 2 messages. I'm new at this. Thanks!

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By on Sun, 01-14-01, 04:35

supermom1023, no big deal about the double posting! I've done it quite a few times. What I do now is go in and edit the second posting to take out all the words and then just say something like, I posted twice by mistake, sorry. But it is really no big deal.

Also, welcome!

Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

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By mamagaona on Sun, 01-14-01, 18:25

Supermom1023,
Thanks for your concern. And as of yet, Rebecca is not covered by the Disabilities Act, IDEA or 504. We are looking to change that shortly. Since I am a public school teacher of Spec. Ed. I am also aware of many private schools in our area, Jersey shore, that accomodate kids under these laws. You may want to check into that for your daughter. It's seems very unChristian not to accomodate an allergy problem. My daughter goes to Hebrew school for religious classes, in addition to public school, and they have been just wonderful, calling me on my cell phone to ask a question midclass if necessary.
Arlene

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By on Wed, 01-17-01, 17:54

I just re-read this whole thread. I wanted to say to all of us who got angry (including myself) about the situation Arlene's daughter could have potentially been placed in - it's not only our children we see being faced with the segregation and us having to deal with the project, we are actually seeing Arlene's child and Arlene. As Connie mentioned when she was voicing her anger, she feels as though we are all family.

I know that about a month ago I had to apologize to Lam because I completely lost it in a thread that she started. But, in apologizing to Lam I made the same point I am going to make now. It is not only because we are thinking of ourselves that we become angry. It is, as Connie says, we feel we know one another here, and although we may never meet in our lives, we deeply care about another child being segregated from their class and their feelings hurt. We deeply care about how another PA parent has to deal with this.

I think anger is an underlying "thing" with PA and when we become angry in a thread, although we may feel the need to apologize, which Caring Mom did and I also believe Connie did, we are angry because we care.
If we didn't care about Arlene and her daughter and the situation, we wouldn't become angry.

What I'm trying to say is that sometimes anger is a good thing if we voice it "properly", which I feel everyone did in this thread anyway. It simply showed that we all cared about Arlene and her daughter. What a wonderful thing!

Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

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By mamagaona on Thu, 01-18-01, 20:22

Cindy-
I agree about the anger comment. If not sharing here, then where can we? It is not anger toward each other, but anger and frustration toward those that don't understand.
Arlene

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