Dealing with Guilt

Recently, we had our a year old son diagnosed with a peanut allergy. There was still a lot of unknown to deal with in term of severity of our son's peanut allergy. Ever since the diagnosis, I have had been dealing with a tremendous amount of guilt. I second guessed everything I did, and especially so, ate while I was pregnant with my son. Then I started thinking about what my son's life would be like now he has a peanut allergy, and suddenly; I was stricken with guilt that he was not going to have a "normal" life, per say.

How do you deal with this guilt?

By ber9698 on Sun, 08-18-13, 05:02

I know how you feel. My son had a severe reaction to peanuts when he was 2 1/2. I was always afraid to give him peanuts for some reason and we were at a party and someone gave him a candy bar he took a tiny bite and his throat closed instantly that was a very scary day. He is now 16 and he has always been very cautious about what he eats and he has lead a normal life its been very tough for him especially because he has been diagnosed with and allergy to eggs about four years ago. he has had a harder time dealing with the egg allergy than his peanut allergy because he grew up with the peanut allergy and as far as the eggs he was used to eating them so now its hard for him to accept that allergy. My son has been very lucky he hadn't had a reaction since he was 2 1/2 up until today when he was out to eat with his girlfriend and they double checked with the restaurant about his allergies and was told that they didn't cook with peanut oil and that they would let the kitchen know about his allergy but after he ate he had a severe allergic reaction to whatever they put into his food. it was very scary for all of us but especially him because he will always remember this reaction. Your son will have a normal life because he is growing up with this allergy so it becomes a normal thing to him so it will be easier for him. sorry for the long post

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By ldwells62 on Fri, 08-16-13, 13:32

I think feeling guilty is a normal reaction. I know I did for several years. My child was also diagnosed with peanut allergy just 2 days after her 1st birthday. I, her mom, gave her a tiny little bite of a pb cookie that I bought at the mall. When we were at home, about 2 hours later, changed her diaper and noticed the hives. Scariest day of my life. Spent several hours in the ER, hours I never want to relive again, ever. For several years I felt so guilty and I blamed myself until I realized that "I did not know this was going to happen". Forgiveness! That was 12 years ago.

Forgive yourself. You did not know that your child was going to be allergic. Educate yourself, your child, your family, everyone that will care for your child. Talk to your child's pediatric allergist. Talk, to me :)

Your son will have a "normal" life, b/c you will teach him, and yourself, how to live :)

Debbie

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