Family Peanut-tainted Parties Support
I'm mostly looking for support or advice from others. We have 3 sons and 1 daughter and our third son (4 years old) was diagnosed with a mild peanut allergy at 1 year old. It has gotten increasingly worse over the years and he had to be treated with an epi-pen once. Mostly we have just tried to deal with it and be part of family events by bringing his own food and treat to parties. The grandparents are very supportive and check food and desserts at every event.
Our kids have an aunt and her husband who don't seem to care. Last year it was a birthday party at a place that sells peanut butter pizza and this year it's a birthday with Subway (unsafe) and she warned me yesterday that the cupcakes aren't safe either. We are going, but bringing our own food for him. They invited us to another party in a few weeks at a restaurant that confirmed with me that they cannot make promises with regards to cross-contamination. We are not going to that one. I hate feeling like we are being stubborn or particular about this, and I feel like we have tried to accomodate. I realize it is their birthdays and they can do what they want, I just wish everyone could be included. Are my husband and I being unreasonable?