Do You Worry Every Time The Phone Rings?

Hi Cindy [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] It doesn't go away, even with me being so easy-going about the allergy. If I am out and I see the red button lighted on the answering machine when I get home, my hearts jumps. When I get calls during the day, my heart also jumps. The only good thing I can say, is that when the nurse calls me, he immediately will say, "How are you? 'Kid's name' is fine, but I have a concern about something." That way I know my kid(s) aren't on route to the hospital. When he says, "Kim, this is Jay, we have a problem." I then know it is more serious than a headache or something like that.
I have only had one PA call and it ended up being minor. The other two involved stitches and a broken collar bone.

Hey Cindy, e-mail me back when you get a chance. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

MKRuby, I always appreciate your input on any of the threads I start because I know your relatively easy going comfort zones compared to mine. So, for me, if you're still nervous every time the phone rings, then probably everyone else is and will continue to be too. Best wishes!

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Cindy I don't know if this will work in your situation but my husband and I budgetted in this preschool year the monthly fee for a mobile phone. Last year my heart would just stop everytime I was unreachable during school hours. I always wondered if he was okay and if I was needed. After his last reaction (wich occured at school)It got so bad that I would come home and just wait for his school to call. I decided I couldn't live like that so we made sure I was ALWAYS reachable with my mobile. Hope this helps and I hope your worries get better.

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melissa

Melissa, that's a really good idea. Do you worry every time your mobile phone rings? Also, a bit off topic, how did your child's reaction happen at school, i.e., what did he come in contact with and did they deal with it well? I have read literature saying that 50% of children will have another reaction one year after their last one if they are in school and usually at school. Thanks for the great idea, though. Best wishes!

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Hi everyone!
My son just started 3 day/week preschool this month, and YES I WORRY when the phone rings!! I even say out loud "Please, don't be the preschool! Please, don't be the preschool!" [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

I get lots of phone calls so I don't worry every time the phone rings. But I also carry a cell phone. I got the cheapest monthly plan and I only keep it turned on while I'm away from home and my son is in school or while I'm on the computer tying up the phone line and he's at school. Only the school has the cell phone number, so if it ever rang I'd panic. Sometimes I hear someone else's phone while I'm out and about and you should see me jump. A cell phone is one more safety device like the Medic Alert bracelet that I wouldn't be without. I can always call 911 and if I have car trouble or something I can get help. It gives me peace of mind and the monthly fees for the cheapest plan are quite low. Mine is about $16 per month and the phone is free with most plans. I recommend it.

I now get nervous when the phone rings since my son started preschool a few weeks ago. We have call waiting, caller id, call waiting caller id, and I have a cell phone--but we had all of this even before we knew of my son's pa! The preschool has my cell phone number but for the first couple of weeks, I couldn't bring myself to go anywhere during the 2 1/2 hours 2 days a week he was in school. I did get brave last week and went to Target during his class. All I can say is how much easier it was with only 1 child with me instead of 2!!!!! (Plus I saw all the other mothers from the preschool there--it must be the thing to do!) Isn't that horrible? I kept my cell phone in my hand the whole time I was there just so I wouldn't miss a call if I did get one. Deanna

My PA son is in the 7th grade, and it has been 11 years since he had a reaction at preschool. But the memory of that terrifying day keeps me a little anxious whenever he is not in my sight. I'm rarely away from my desk and telephone during work hours, and usually eat lunch in, so my "dull" routine helps keep the anxiety at bay. How I'm going to cope with his increasing freedom as a teenager is a good question!

I had a cell phone, but since I am at home writing all day, it isn't necessary for me to have one right now. I will also be working at the school ocassionally, so for me, it's fine. When I did have the cell phone, the school was the only place to have the number and when it would ring, I jumped.

No matter what our comfort zone, that phone ringing always brings out the fear we all started out with. We are normal, frantic inside, parents. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

I choose to carry a pager (beeper). It is smaller than a phone and I can turn it onto vibrate when I don't want it to make any noise. It is very cheap and definitely worth the peace of mind to know that I can always be reached. I write the number on my son's Epipen Jr. prescription package and of course tell everyone the number.

Count me in! I worry about the phone ringing, I rush people off the phone on school days etc... Am getting better though. Good to hear I'm in good company!

I have caller id on my work phone so I know when my daycare is calling. When I see their number, my heart skips a beat, and no matter who is in my cube, I answer the phone. One time, my son was given peanut products at daycare (before I had an epi)and daycare wouldn't give him any Benadryl without hearing from my husband or myself. As it happened, we were both away from our desks and couldn't be reached. I was actually on my way to daycare. I got there shortly and hardly recognized my child. I was fortunate that the Benadryl worked and then got a lot more education about peanut allergies. Since then we have gotten a pager. Daycare will call me first. If they get my voice mail, they will immediately call the pager. This plan has worked well for us.

Count me in too! I have all the extras on my phone line, call waiting, Id, etc...and I too get nervous every time I get a 'beep' when I'm on the phone or check my messages. Sometimes, I feel anxiety taking my shower when no one is home so I won't miss a call!We just got a cell phone, so I can at least do the grocery shopping/errands in less time than when I have to take the kids! But for the first 2 weeks of school, we didn't have the phone, and I wouldn't leave the house. I also don't go very far from home (I'm a SAHM) when I do go out and about because I factor in the distance from where I am to the school in case I have to get there in a hurry.

The first time my daughter had a minor reaction at school this year, I didn't have the cell phone yet and it was right at the time I left my house to pick up my son who gets out earlier. When I got to Meggie's school, she wasn't in the line with the other kids and my heart dropped to my shoes. I didn't see her anywhere! Then I saw her come out with the nurse and I said "What happened?" No, 'hi' or anything! They had given her Benadryl for a mild reaction but couldn't reach me because she knew I was picking up my son and would be there shortly. Luckily, it was only minor and that weekend we got the cell phone. But, the next week, I had to go to school for a meeting with my other daughter and before I left the house, the phone rang but the connection was interrupted. When I got to school, I saw an ambulance out front and immediately connected the phone call to the ambulance! I bolted into the nurse's office and interrupted a meeting and all I could do was point to the ambulance as I was so nervous the words didn't come out! She told me to relax--it was a Dad who was attending the same meeting I was!
Oh, there's one more! I finally had the cell phone but put it on 'vibrate' because it was in my pocket and I was afraid I wouldn't hear it. Well, it vibrated and shocked the 'heck' out of me and by the time I took it out of my pocket and answered it, I lost the call. I knew it was the school, as they and my kids and hubby are the only ones with the number---she had another minor reaction! So, Cindy and all---you see, I'm very nervous, too. And, I have the grey hairs to prove it!!!

Ah, we all have the grey hairs to prove it, some of us just hide them better than others! (and then some of us deserve them for being the age we are to begin with) [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/biggrin.gif[/img]
It sounds like pretty well everyone is in the same boat with this one and that it's not something that's going to go away. I'm fortunate right now because Jesse doesn't go every day but I guess next year when he does, I'll have to get the call waiting back and a cell phone, etc. No, you're always worried that you're going to miss the phone call or even get the phone call when they're not with you, aren't you? Hmm. Best wishes.

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AGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!! It's worrisome enough with my 5 yr old NON-PA son in school all day now.......I don't even want to think about when the other two (daughter- peanut and nut allergic, son-wheat, egg, dairy,peanut and nut allergic)start school!!!!!!
tkiaml [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img] [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

My MIL picked up my son at nursery school once- They said, "We have bad news for you".
She was braced for the worst possible news. It turned out his shoe had been misplaced during a field trip and he had only one shoe.

As far as thje rest, I rely on a cell phone. The next step is to get voicemail on it. I stress every time I see voicemail light at work during school hours.

Hi, I just want to say that my son is 14 and I worry all the time. I never stop. Now he is playing football and he loves it. I was so upset one day because the boys drank his water. It wasn't even because of the germs,but that what if they had eaten a peanut product before practice. Christopher says"gee I wasn't really thinking about that mom". I know he takes very good care of himself but I called the coach right away. THey had a talk and told the boys why they should not be doing this. The kids were very sorry for what happened. I know I will always worry about my son. I think that when we love them so much and have almost lost them that we have the right to worry. I have said this before and I always will. I feel that Christopher and I will always have a special relationship because he has seen how much we love him. He has not had a reacion since first grade and that is because we are super careful. The worry is always there but not always in our discussions. Just be careful not to over talk about it at this age because he will say to me "mom stop worrying I will be o.k. Good luck to all of you mothers. Claire

Claire, what a wonderful post. I especially liked the part where you said that the worry is there but it isn't something that you discuss all the time. That's the way I feel about my son even though he's just nearly 5. He doesn't know how many freak-outs I have about his PA, I just do. And, you've proven again, that no matter what age, because of this particular allergy, we're always more nervous. Thanks so much for sharing. Best wishes.

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I will never forget the first time my pager went off for "real". I had just left the school and was hurrying to Target ( must be the Mom thing to do). Anyway when I saw the schools number I dropped my pager. Even while I was dialing the school on my cell phone I had already turned around and was hurrying back to school. My daughter had been eating her snack and started to complain of burning, tingly lips. Turns out she was eating saltines and had chapped lips but it was a good learning experience.

I also pray as I am walking into the house for no messages and then continue to say "don't be the school, don't be the school". If it is the school they always say right away " It's not an emergency". I don't know why I dread the answering machine because the school can always reach me when I am out- I have a pager with voicemail and a cell phone. Just paranoid I guess.

A couple of weeks ago when we were at the FAN conference the people sharing the lunch table with us got a message- to call home right away very important. I recognized the fear on their faces and told my husband that is not good. It turned out to be nothing but the girl commented on how scared she had been and was sure something had happened to her son.

At least we are all in this boat together.
Linda

Linda, I think that us all being in the same boat and being able to share that on this board is the wonderful thing about this site!
I'm sure that there are other parents out there that dread telephone calls from the school because they also have children with difficulties (I can't think of a better word at this time), but the really great thing about this board is that we're all able to share that. I know that I don't tell anyone about my fear of the phone ringing or a message being left for me and yet, thanks to this board and being on-line I'm able to do that. In some way it's a weight lifted when it's shared, even with people we'll probably never meet or keep in touch with for a long time, but we have it for now. As I mentioned in another thread, there's something about PA that brings this out - both my children have asthma and yet I haven't searched out an asthma discussion board. The PA just seems to have a different hold on a lot of us. Best wishes!

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I was once out to dinner with my husband and my Mom was watching my boys for us. We had just arrived at the restaurant when the pager went off. Of course my heart was in my throat. I quickly called home and was ready to hop in the car. As it turned out, my Mom was having trouble figuring out the remote control for the TV! Uhggg!

Hi PattyR - That is exactly what happened to me! My parents can never figure out how to work our remote(s)! I never thought of anyone else being called at a restaurant to give remote control instructions. Thanks for a good chuckle!

I always worried when the phone rang when we first put Cayley in nursery school, but we've had other problems with her, besides the PA, namely SEPARATION ANXIETY! I'm relieved when the phone rings 'cause I know I'm going to get an update on how her day is going. I guess PA stands out in my mind only if I'm not dealing with other issues. I think we're going to keep Cayley at home starting in November - she's just too shy to handle all the kids at school at her age (3). I'm lucky that I have the option to send her or keep her - if I had to work, it would be heartbreaking to leave her every morning. By the way, we send her 2 mornings a week and it was an attempt to help her overcome her shyness and let her see school is fun -backfired bigtime! Take care everyone!

You know, I have never worried about the phone ringing, even when it has been the daycare calling. And I am pretty paranoid about everything else. hmmmm... I guess I am just very comfortable with their level of being careful. They have 4 other PA kids and watch all the food as closely as I do.

I'm a new member and can certainly relate to what everybody has to say on living with a peanut allergy. I have one question for Cindy - I read your article "Living with a Peanut Allergy" in the Community Column. I am very interested in what your wrote about peanut butter - that it can last for up to six months on surfaces. I told my son's school nurse about this and she had never heard this fact. Can you tell me more about this. It is quite scary (what isn't with this allergy?) We have had a cell phone now for 1 1/2 years. I wouldn't be without it now. After my son's last peanut exposure (we were difficult to reach) - we picked one up right away.

Jackie, I know that I read the information re the residue lasting for up to six months SOMEWHERE, now it's just trying to find out where. It wouldn't have been computer based because I have known this for quite some time. I just went through my son's school board policy to see if it was in there and although they do say things about residue, they don't mention a time frame. Please give me some time and I'll try to find out exactly where I got this information. As soon as I find it, I'll post it. Best wishes!

Jackie, do you think for the life of me I can find the information I had for writing that article? I went through [url="http://www.oma.org"]www.oma.org[/url] and I went through my son's school board policy and the Anaphylaxis Handbook for Schools and I CANNOT find the wording. I have found the wording that the residue can stay on surfaces after they have been cleaned. What I cannot find is the 6 months.
This is going to consume me until I get an answer. But, by re-reading the information I did have, I do know that PA people can have reactions to residue on previously washed surfaces. However, I need to find the 6 months wording for me to feel confident that my article is correct. Do you know what I mean? This is disturbing me greatly because I know I couldn't have come up with it myself! At any rate, I wanted to confirm about reactions to residue and will continue to try to find where I got the 6 months from. I even checked AAIA in Quebec. Oh well. I'll keep trying. If anyone else finds it, please let me know! Or, if I'm wrong, please let me know! Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/confused.gif[/img]

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I thought I was the only one worried when my son was at school/friends/relatives or to be somewhere without me. Everytime the phone rings I always think that he is having an allergic reaction & I can't help & he should be with me.

When my son started school I got myself a cell phone. I got one of the pay-as-you go plans and it only costs me $10 every 3 months. It also has call display so I know if it is the school calling or not. It has really given me piece of mind to know I won't miss that crucial phone call while I'm out. It's also great to have if he is in the care of someone other then myself, as my son is 6 now and likes to go to friend's houses for a while.

When my daughter was getting ready for school, the allergist told me to get a pager. I had a cell phone at the time and he said that would do. As for waiting for "that call", yes I do worry, it may be unconsiously (sp?) but the fear is there every day.

Six months ago, I saw a neurologist for my migranes. I told him that even though I was a stay at home Mom I had an exceptional amount of job related stress. He asked why and I mentioned my food allergic daughter starting kindergarten. It turned out that he has a daughter I believe in 9th grade and he still panics when he hears the phone ring.

It made me feel better knowing that a doctor was able to relate to the stress I deal with daily. I have learned to make the fear part of my life--I rule it, not the other way around.

I'm simply re-raising this one in the hopes that it may compliment and/or help the current thread Gadget has raised.

Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

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As I read through all the postings here I had to laugh. Thank goodness! I'M NOT CRAZY!Any time my phone rings I get a horrible feeling in my chest. Here's another one for you. The school has been told to call 911 before me so being that I live close to the firehall and ambulances everytime I heard the sirens I worry, especially if my phone rings a few minutes after.It is such a relief to hear everyone else feels the same way.

hello,
as usual a good thread cindy, i carry a mobile phone every where, the school and my husband have the number so if it rings it can only be hubby or the school and yes twice it has been the school this year. but my total bad luck has been the fact that my phone keeps becoming faluty , locking at the slightest touch and not responding to the code numbers. its worring knowing that there could be a problem, and its bound to happen when the flashy

Fourth year of Jesse starting school/going to school and yes, I have to say, I've finished two weeks of school now and do worry every time the phone rings or every time I use the internet which ties the phone up or every time I step out of the house.

However, I do know that this also dies down, and has, each year for me, after about a month. It should do the same thing this year for me as well.

I remember so well the first year he went to school. 3-3/4 years old, off he went to JK, for two days one week, three the next. I had call waiting put on the phone just in case I should happen to be on the phone when the school tried to call. His teacher was so perfect that year and got it so quickly that I had the call waiting feature removed about after two months. And I've never had it put back on.

But again, this summer, especially since we were moving and had the option to change things around since we were re-connecting different services, I did think about getting cable internet so I wouldn't tie up the phone. It's actually still a thought in my head.

So, yes, for me, 4th year into school, still worrying, right now, September month, every time the phone rings. And as soon as I disconnect the internet or come in from an errand, I immediately check the phone to see if there is a message and if there is, my heart pounds 'til I get it.

Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

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Thank goodness there are people out there like me! I read through all of the postings and it is so reassuring that I am not the only one that feels "crazy" at times...hence, my user name! My son is in the 8th grade now, and I must say the intense worry is not as persistent as when he was younger. I guess as they get older, they become more independent(as much as I have struggled with this). My son is very level-headed and conservative I think this helps me with my worry. Although he has never had to use his epi-pen, he has been instructed on the use and has injected an orange with one. He carries his own epi-pen and benadryl everywhere he goes. The worry is still there, and he really doesn't like me talking about it-he gets tired of it! When he gets of dating age, there will be a new set of worries...kissing. What then? Is anyone experiencing that age now? I don't even want to think about it. Preschool and kindergarten through early grade school were definately the most stressful years of my life-I feel that I had really aged. I wish I had the support of this web site back then-I really felt all alone and sometimes that I was loosing my mind. As far as the phone ringing, I don't get stressed out as much anymore, however, I have a cell phone on everytime I leave the house and the school has the number. Thank goodness the teachers and principals have all been careful and supportive. (all except an incident in kindergarten where a child, parent, and teacher forgot about the no peanut rule and brought in peanut butter cups for snacks. I nearly had a cow!! Both the teacher and principal heard about that one!) Sorry for rambling! This discussion board had brought back some memories. I know what you are going through though, there were times I didn't even want to leave the house until my son was home from school-I am a stay at home mom. Good luck to all, remember, the worry doesn't go away, it just gets more manageable. (At least for me, now until dating age!!)

I was always worried everytime the phone rang and would always make sure that I was home around lunch and snack time. After no lunchtime reactions that last two years I had gotten to where I would run errands etc. in the morning after dropping the kids off for school and make sure I was home by 11 ish when he was at lunch. Well, wouldn't you know one morning I went to WalMart and when I got home there was a message to call the school right away, Timmy was having a bad reaction!! A little boy had brought a bunny rabbit to school for show and tell and Timmy held it and was a sight!! Well after that I stayed at home for about a week, but was going crazy because I was not able to get any errands done (its a lot easier to pay bills by myself than with 4 children tagging along!). I finally got a beeper. Nobody ever beeps me so when it does go off I freak out! LOL!! But I feel sooooo much better knowing that I can be reached anytime/ anyplace!!!

Valerie

At least DH is in the same boat as me this year. He's gone back to college so he doesn't have a phone number where he can be reached like he would if he was working and at work, you could basically call him if it wasn't an emergency.

Well. Him not being near a phone in case something happened and that's all I heard about all summer was how he had to get a cell phone for going to school in case there was an emergency.

So, he is now complete with cell phone and although I can't imagine his angst would be as great as mine (only because I minimalize him), he does have it this year and more evidently because he has the cell phone than before.

Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

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Yes, it is good to know I am not alone! This year is worse than last since he is now eating lunch at school. I watch the clock from 11:45 to about 12:45 when I know that they are all in from recess and have washed their hands. If my pager goes off during that time, I absolutely JUMP a mile. I hope it gets better during the year... [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/wink.gif[/img]Kristi

Simply re-raising. [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

Best wishes! [img]http://uumor.pair.com/nutalle2/peanutallergy/smile.gif[/img]

Seems like wonderful, concerned, PA parents think alike!!!!! I'll nix the Prozac prescription...for now....!