Scared at Restaurants

My boyfriend has a peanut allergy and I'm always afraid something will have peanuts in it when we least expect it. We always ask for his dishes but we forget to ask for mine! I don't want to seem annoying to him but it's always a fear in the back of my mind. Any suggestions?

By Dmarie411 on Sun, 10-06-13, 16:07

I'm 25 years old with a peanut/tree nut allergy. When I first started dating my boyfriend, I was embarrassed about going out to eat because I have a laundry list of other allergies as well. He is truly the best when it comes to them, and I know I appreciate when he asks questions, especially when I may forget. Allergyeats is a fantastic app that we use ALL the time, especially when in unfamiliar areas. I also make sure to call ahead of time and find out, or google an allergy menu. I always check with the restaurant when we get there and if I don't feel comfortable, we leave. If I ever question what he is eating, or if he has had something during the day when I'm not there, 4 hours is a rule of thumb for kissing, minimum. Also, extensive brushing of the teeth.

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By PeanutAllergy.com on Thu, 10-03-13, 23:25

Question of the Week: Answered!

Every week, PeanutAllergy.com is answering one of the questions posted in our community.

Our Answer:
As annoying as it may seem to you, he may appreciate that you are concerned for his well-being. Ask him how he feels about situations where you’ve asked restaurants about their ingredients.

Here are some tips for when you are dining out with your boyfriend:

  • - Call the restaurant ahead of time to ensure that they are willing and able to cater to your boyfriend’s peanut allergy
  • - Avoid buffets
  • - Ask to see the ingredient list
  • - Remind him to bring epinephrine in case of an emergency
  • - If you forget to ask about your dishes, make sure to wash your hands after handling the food (hand sanitizer is not as effective) and avoid kissing him for a few hours
  • - Check out AllergyEats, a smartphone app where you can find allergy-friendly restaurants

Hopefully these tips – and the great advice from others in our community – can help ease your fears about dining out with your peanut-allergic boyfriend.

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By Hdmech10 on Wed, 10-02-13, 03:07

Stay away from Applebee's them their menu states not responsible for allergen contamination or something along those lines . Be careful and don't be afraid or embarrassed to ask the wait staff the questions you ask can save a life.

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By evan on Fri, 08-30-13, 04:36

A girlfriend with that kind of attention to detail to his allergy is awesome, so kudos to you.
Talk to him about it, I always feel annoying when I ask in restaurants and used to be annoyed when my parents asked for me, but now I really appreciate it. My mom has a severe shellfish allergy (shellfish)) as well so we would always as for peanut, nut and shellfish free for the whole table so everyone felt comfortable. Trust me, I think he will feel uncomfortable kissing you if there is the doubt in his mind you ate something contaminated, even if he may not say it.

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By daniswenson on Tue, 07-16-13, 21:24

That is a legitimate fear to have. I'm sure he has the same fears and I doubt he thinks that you are annoying for that. He probably thinks it's nice that you really care about his allergy and don't want him to have any problems with it. Keep doing what you're doing, but remember that it is ultimately up to him to deal with the allergy, so don't stress yourself out. And if you feel like you are always asking questions about it, have a talk with him about how you are worried for him, so you can't help but always be cautious. I'm sure he'll understand!

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